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The Good Wife's Guide (Guys - You're gonna love this)
http://www.gmu.edu/departments/economics/wew/misc/days.doc ^ | 13 May 1955 | Housekeeping Monthly Magazine

Posted on 10/14/2005 10:20:29 AM PDT by add925

The good wife's guide

1. Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready, on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospect of a good meal(especially his favourite dish) is part of the warm welcome needed.

2. Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you'll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh looking. He has just been with a lot of work weary people.

3. Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.

4. Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives.

5. Gather up schoolbooks, toys, paper etc and then run a dustcloth over the tables.

6. Over the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering for his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction.

7. Prepare the children. Take a few minutes to wash the children's hands and faces(if they are small), comb their hair and, if necessary, change their clothes. They are little treasures and he would like to see them playing the part. Minimize all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer, or vacuum. Try to encourage the children to be quiet.

8. Be happy to see him.

9. Greet him with a warm smile and shoe sincerity in your desire to please him.

10. Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first- remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.

11. Make the evening his. Never complain if he comes home late or goes out to dinner, or other places of entertainment without you. Instead, try to understand his world of strain and pressure and his very real need to be at home and relax.

12. Your goal: Try to make sure your homeis a place of peace, order and tranquility where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit.

13. Dont greet him with complaints and problems.

14. Dont complain if he's late home for dinner or even if he stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through that day.

15. Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or have him lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him.

16. Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice.

17. Dont ask him questions about his actions or question his judgment or integrity. Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will alwaysexercise his will with fairness and truthfullness. You have no right to question him.

18. A good wife always knows her place.


TOPICS: Culture/Society; Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS: genderwars; haimusingtehinternet; housewife; oldastheinternet; welcometo7yearsago
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To: add925

Sexist overtones nonwithstanding, this article is simply about common courtesy. He married the svelte, makeup'd chick and not the haggard, unkempt, stressed housewife... one of the reasons I put on makeup and put up my hair every morning, whether I'm going out or not.


421 posted on 10/14/2005 6:11:29 PM PDT by Seamoth
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To: add925

Sexist overtones nonwithstanding, this article is simply about common courtesy. He married the svelte, makeup'd chick and not the haggard, unkempt, stressed housewife... one of the reasons I put on makeup and put up my hair every morning, whether I'm going out or not.


422 posted on 10/14/2005 6:11:37 PM PDT by Seamoth
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To: Sally'sConcerns

You were married to a bad guy. You were wise to get out early on and not end up beaten to death. Good for you. You picked up your life and went on...as did I. Time helps heal the hurts. Been there done that.


423 posted on 10/14/2005 6:13:41 PM PDT by Conservative4Ever (God bless America...land that I love...stand beside her and guide her...)
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To: add925
Like my '...Guide' better....

A loving mother to my children, the perfect hostess when guests arrive, and an absolute slut in bed.

Yep.....am still a single kinda guy!

424 posted on 10/14/2005 6:16:45 PM PDT by GoldCountryRedneck ("Love and cooking should both be approached with wild abandon" - Author unknown)
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To: Sally'sConcerns
First, I never said women are bitches. Second, you married an animal.

I feel for any women who is a victim of marital fraud. Same goes for the guys out there. Lot of folks git hitched on a whim and end up regretting it. Number one reason in my op is the unwillingness to compromise. Some folks, you can't compromise with. Got to end it if thats the case.

There are quite a few women...now before I go any further, I want to state that indeed, some men are spoiled children who never grow up... "My Toy Box" is an example...

I do not go out with the boys but a few times a year if that...I insist my stay at home wife with a 3, 6 and 9 year old, that she goes out once every couple weeks with her girl friends and let lose...at least once a month. She goes out from time to time with em. I don't care if dinner is on the table when I get home...I don't care if I have to do a load of laundry from time to time...hell I'll even wash the kitchen floor at times...

Now, back to women... There are a lot, my sister is one of them, who think they are gods gift. They are unwilling to compromise. They are unwilling to get along. They are unwilling to get into a relationship and become one with the individual. It is me, me, me, me, me. They use sex as a device, and grow to not enjoy it. When this happens, you can either write the relationship off, or you can rest assured, the guy is in hell for the rest of his days.

There needs a mutual understanding of unconditional love and support. There needs to be a camaraderie. A team effort. Relationships today, some anyway, lack this.

I think back and remember my childhood days... I remember the frying pan flying across the room on several different occasions, straight off the stove, but it was from my mother, trajectory, my father. Who was at fault? I'm sure Freud would have a field day with. They divorced and it taught me that if you say "I do", you better be damn sure because your life will be hell, or your life will be shattered.


Iv'e gotten a little more gray since this shot...she is still a li'l fire cracker!

We just had our 12th anniversary. We've had our problems, but our willingness to compromise pulls us through. She does not put her hands on her hips and stomps her feet...she does not use sex as a device...she gives no reason(well, 99% of the time) for conflict. She keeps me straight...well, she offers her thoughts and upon reflection I concede. It is compromise and I use that word again because I do not know of a better term....

SR

425 posted on 10/14/2005 6:49:12 PM PDT by sit-rep (If you acquire, hit it again to verify...)
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To: add925
No, got it via email and other FReepers found it on the web at places like Indiana University's website (talk about irony in the land of Kinsey!).

That's no surprise. I'm sure IU's womens studies uses this sort of stuff in thier process of building new angry feminists.

426 posted on 10/14/2005 6:52:15 PM PDT by disclaimer
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To: add925

Favourite?


427 posted on 10/14/2005 6:53:00 PM PDT by HiTech RedNeck (No wonder the Southern Baptist Church threw Greer out: Only one god per church! [Ann Coulter])
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To: add925

What a crock of crap.


428 posted on 10/14/2005 6:54:49 PM PDT by cyborg (I'm on the 24 plan having the best day ever.)
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To: Alberta's Child

ROTFLOL! My dear AC, let me put it this way: I don't want, need, or desire a master. Now, a husband is another story. LOL.


429 posted on 10/14/2005 6:55:02 PM PDT by Victoria Delsoul
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To: HairOfTheDog

LOL

Classic!!

I am stealing that!!!


430 posted on 10/14/2005 7:04:21 PM PDT by MikefromOhio (Pwner of Noobs)
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To: MikeinIraq

I stole it too ;~D

Can't tell what forum it's looking at, but it ~might~ be DU.


431 posted on 10/14/2005 7:06:19 PM PDT by HairOfTheDog (Join the Hobbit Hole Troop Support - http://freeper.the-hobbit-hole.net/)
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To: Sally'sConcerns

"Dad's" behavior in this sad vignette is a caution. Onus is on the WIFE to make something like THAT work? Sounds like "Dad" may not have been all that kind to his own wife and daughters before either.

That being said, such a situation doesn't necessarily have to end up in splitsville. My brother blew up like that once years ago. Broke a wooden spindle and bashed a hole in the wall with a vitamin bottle. But his wife did not walk out. Several family members were hastily summoned and they talked him into going to a mental hospital. Once he got the proper medication he was back to normal function.


432 posted on 10/14/2005 7:06:44 PM PDT by HiTech RedNeck (No wonder the Southern Baptist Church threw Greer out: Only one god per church! [Ann Coulter])
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To: HairOfTheDog

LOL

well every ONCE in a great while they come up with something good...but chances are they stole it too.....

that guy talking about 3somes...what a crock of horse dung


433 posted on 10/14/2005 7:07:28 PM PDT by MikefromOhio (Pwner of Noobs)
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To: gogeo

Post of the day



In my best Elvis
thankya thankya vury much


434 posted on 10/14/2005 7:09:02 PM PDT by WKB (If you can't dazzle them with brilliance.. then Baffle them with BS)
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To: Caipirabob
The Good Wife’s Guide for the New Millennium

by Uncle Vlad

Let him get his own damn dinner. You’ve worked all day yourself, and it’s high time the big baby learned something about domestic self-reliance.

Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him. When you’ve learned how to fake sincerity, your relationship will be a happy one.

Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. Make sure he finds your girlfriend and you in the sack together when he gets home.

Prepare the children. Take a few minutes to wash the children’s hands and faces (if they are small), comb their hair, and if necessary, change their clothes. Take care never to tell him they’re not his children.

Don’t complain if he comes home late for dinner or even stays out all night. You can always find your own action through the personal ads in your local alternative newspaper.

Don’t greet him with complaints or problems. Leave that job to your lawyer.

Prepare yourself. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh-looking. After all, if this farce of a marriage doesn’t work out, you’ll want to look good if you find yourself back on the market.

Clear away the clutter to ensure a tranquil evening. Take care to hide any articles of men’s clothing that aren’t his.

Question everything. You didn’t spend thousands of dollars and years in therapy to be some rube’s doormat.

A good wife knows her place—with her foot firmly on the nape of her husband’s neck.

435 posted on 10/14/2005 7:13:23 PM PDT by Uncle Vlad
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To: wideawake; WKB
him to WKB-- Idiot boy, this was posted as an authentic item. It is not.

I am unaware of any FR rule which says: "You can post lies, as long as they're not in Breaking News."

They didn't put the local karate place in breaking news either. Come to think of it, they didn't put the local car shop in their either. They didn't put Michael Jackson in it either. What's this world coming to?

WK--didn't you get called "idiot boy" by that 15-year-old stoner the other day? Or maybe it was that two-year-old one. It's about the same kind of language.

436 posted on 10/14/2005 7:13:42 PM PDT by moog
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To: moog; wideawake
WK--didn't you get called "idiot boy" by that 15-year-old stoner the other day? Or maybe it was that two-year-old one. It's about the same kind of language.



It was the 2 year old.
But after his momma slapped him around for a while
he is wideawake now and knows not to call people names.
437 posted on 10/14/2005 7:21:11 PM PDT by WKB (If you can't dazzle them with brilliance.. then Baffle them with BS)
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To: WKB; wideawake

It was the 2 year old.
But after his momma slapped him around for a while
he is wideawake now and knows not to call people names.

The other guy must have eaten the soap then.


438 posted on 10/14/2005 7:22:44 PM PDT by moog
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To: add925

The good husband’s guide

1. Take her out to dinner. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a reservation ready and a babysitter arranged. This is a way of letting her know that you have been thinking about her and are concerned about her needs. Most women are exhausted and harried by the time you come home and the prospect of a good meal (made and cleaned up by someone else) is part of the warm greeting needed.

2. Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes on your way home to make yourself presentable. For goodness sake, man, brush your hair and chew a breathmint! She has just been with a lot of miniature walking Chinese torture devices all day long. (Your children.) The least you could do is have good breath.

3. Be interesting and witty. Make her laugh. Face it: Laundry and dishes are mind-numbingly dull. Her boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.

4. Don’t ask her about the extra charges on the Visa...

5. Gather up your dirty socks, your dirty shirts, your shoes….then. WASH YOUR OWN LAUNDRY, YOU SLOB!

6. Over the cooler months of the year you should give her a glass of wine, light a fire for her to unwind by, and rub her feet until she falls asleep. Then go do the dinner dishes. Your wife will feel she has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering to her sanity will provide you with immense personal satisfaction.

7. Watch the children, and let her go out with the girls.

8. Tell her she’s beautiful all the time. Do not hate the weight she gained while carrying your children. Embrace it. It’s your fault.

9. Greet her with chocolate and a gift certificate for a mani/pedi.

10. Listen to her. No, REALLY!

11. Don’t ask her about the extra charges on the AmEx...

12. Your goal: Try to help her relax, despite the fact that she is in her workplace 24/7.

13. Don’t greet her with complaints and problems…and don’t ask her about the extra charges on the Mastercard... A woman has to have a vice.

14. Don’t complain if you come home to find her sitting on the couch in her pj’s surrounded by laundry and the breakfast dishes. Count this as minor compared to what the house would have looked like had she done NOTHING that day.

15. Draw a hot bubble bath for her, light some candles, put on some nice music…just to make her happy. Don’t do it for your own motives…ahem.

16. Arrange her pillow and offer to buy her expensive shoes. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice when talking about shoes.

17. Don’t ask any questions about housework or question her parenting. Remember, she is the master of the house because you are gone during most waking hours. You have no right to question her.

18. A good husband knows his place.

439 posted on 10/14/2005 7:40:08 PM PDT by I'm ALL Right! (WWW.ENDOFTHESPEAR.COM - A True Story. In theaters Jan 20, 2006. Click my profile.)
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To: I'm ALL Right!
The good husband’s guide

Sorry, all I can see is your title, after that, your post is blank, with no text. Perhaps its my computer ;)

440 posted on 10/14/2005 8:53:13 PM PDT by add925 (The Left = Xenophobes in Denial)
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