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George Carlin on Katrina (funny)
email going around

Posted on 10/07/2005 6:16:59 AM PDT by Uncledave

Been sitting here with my ass in a wad, wanting to speak out about the bullshit going on in New Orleans. For the people of New Orleans... First we would like to say, Sorry for your loss. With that said, Lets go through a few hurricane rules: (Unlike an earthquake, we know it's coming)

#1. A mandatory evacuation means just that..Get the hell out.

Don't blame the Government after they tell you to go. If they hadn't said anything, I can see the argument. They said get out... if you didn't, it's your fault, not theirs. (We don't want to hear it, even if you don't have a car, you can get out.)

#2. If there is an emergency, stock up on water and non-perishables. If you didn't do this, it's not the Government's fault you're starving.

#2a. If you run out of food and water, find a store that has some.

(Remember, shoes, TV's, DVD's and CD's are not edible. Leave them alone.)

#2b. If the local store has been looted of food or water, leave your neighbor's TV and stereo alone. (See # 2a) They worked hard to get their stuff. Just because they were smart enough to leave during a mandatory evacuation, doesn't give you the right to take their stuff...it's theirs, not yours.

#3. If someone comes in to help you, don't shoot at them and then complain no one is helping you. I'm not getting shot to help save some dumbass who didn't leave when told to do so.

#4. If you are in your house that is completely under water, your belongings are probably too far gone for anyone to want them. If someone does want them, let them have them and hopefully they'll die in the filth. Just leave!

(It's New Orleans, find a voodoo warrior and put a curse on them)

#5. My tax money should not pay to rebuild a 2 million dollar house, a sports stadium or a floating casino. Also, my tax money shouldn't go to rebuild a city that is under sea level. You wouldn't build your house on quicksand would you? You want to live below sea-level, do your country some good and join the Navy.

#6. Regardless of what the Poverty Pimps Jessie Jackson and Al Sharpton want you to believe, The US Government didn't create the Hurricane as a way to eradicate the black people of New Orleans; (Neither did Russia as a way to destroy America). The US Government didn't cause global warming that caused the hurricane (We've been coming out of an ice age for over a million years).

#7. The government isn't responsible for giving you anything. This is the land of the free and the home of the brave, but you gotta work for what you want. McDonalds and Wal-Mart are always hiring, get a damn job and stop spooning off the people who are actually working for a living.

President Kennedy said it best..."Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country."

Thank you for allowing me to rant.

George Carlin


TOPICS: Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS: blacks; carlin; gallowshumor; georgecarlin; humor; ibetitsfake; icantfindchat; katrina; myemailisnews
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1 posted on 10/07/2005 6:17:00 AM PDT by Uncledave
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To: Uncledave

I seriously doubt this is from George Carlin. He would have been ranting about the US troops in Iraq.


2 posted on 10/07/2005 6:18:16 AM PDT by dfwgator (Flower Mound, TX)
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To: Uncledave
Some good points in the article but I heard this isn't really Carlin.
3 posted on 10/07/2005 6:18:54 AM PDT by varyouga (Reformed Kerry voter (I know, I'm a frickin' idiot))
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To: Uncledave

One thing is absolutely certain: George Carlin didn't write this.


4 posted on 10/07/2005 6:19:20 AM PDT by wideawake (God bless our brave troops and their Commander-in-Chief)
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To: Uncledave

I have a feeling George Carlin didn't write this...


5 posted on 10/07/2005 6:20:12 AM PDT by Living Free in NH
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To: Uncledave
#6. Regardless of what the Poverty Pimps Jessie Jackson and Al Sharpton want you to believe, The US Government didn't create the Hurricane as a way to eradicate the black people of New Orleans; (Neither did Russia as a way to destroy America). The US Government didn't cause global warming that caused the hurricane (We've been coming out of an ice age for over a million years).


Thought he was a lib... guess not.
6 posted on 10/07/2005 6:20:18 AM PDT by LesbianThespianGymnasticMidget (God punishes Conservatives by making them argue with fools.)
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To: varyouga

I doubt it's Carlin too. It's probably another fraud email like the "I'm a bad American" email that circulated a few years ago that was incorrectly attributed to him.


7 posted on 10/07/2005 6:20:31 AM PDT by VA_Gentleman
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To: Uncledave

Not nearly funny enough to be Carlin.


8 posted on 10/07/2005 6:20:46 AM PDT by Wolfie
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To: Uncledave

No, it's from Ted Nugent/Dennis Miller/Andy Rooney.


9 posted on 10/07/2005 6:21:08 AM PDT by avg_freeper (Gunga galunga. Gunga, gunga galunga)
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To: dfwgator

Me too.


10 posted on 10/07/2005 6:21:32 AM PDT by netmilsmom (God blessed me with a wonderful husband.)
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To: Uncledave

Uh, sorry, but no way George Carlin authored this. I ain't buyin'.


11 posted on 10/07/2005 6:22:07 AM PDT by Obadiah (Support Harriet Miers!)
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To: Wolfie
Not nearly funny enough to be Carlin.

You mean Carlin in his prime, sadly that was many years ago.

12 posted on 10/07/2005 6:22:31 AM PDT by dfwgator (Flower Mound, TX)
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To: dfwgator

Also doubt this is from George Carlin (sounds more like Nathan Porter)... but I did enjoy it.


13 posted on 10/07/2005 6:22:53 AM PDT by silverleaf (Fasten your seat belts- it's going to be a BUMPY ride.)
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To: dfwgator

Comedy is subjective. No sense arguing about it.


14 posted on 10/07/2005 6:23:26 AM PDT by Wolfie
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To: Uncledave

Definitely not Carlin unless he has had a brain transplant.


15 posted on 10/07/2005 6:23:28 AM PDT by Millie
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To: LesbianThespianGymnasticMidget
Thought he was a lib... guess not.

You guessed right the first time.

There's no way this is from Carlin.

16 posted on 10/07/2005 6:23:37 AM PDT by PBRSTREETGANG
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To: Uncledave

LOL and a breath of fresh air, from George. . .


17 posted on 10/07/2005 6:23:52 AM PDT by cricket (No Freedom - No Peace)
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Comment #18 Removed by Moderator

To: dfwgator
I thought Ted Nugent said this!!!!

(Or maybe it was Mark Twain)

19 posted on 10/07/2005 6:24:29 AM PDT by Tribune7
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To: Uncledave

I doubt that George Carlin wrote this.

(but I will be passing it on as his anyway)


20 posted on 10/07/2005 6:24:44 AM PDT by linkinpunk
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