Posted on 09/22/2005 5:48:16 PM PDT by wagglebee
We hear a lot of talk these days about the need to protect and strengthen the traditional American family. Certainly, it is true that the institution of marriage is under attack from every side. But the real threat comes from the multitudes of couples that fail to honor their marriage vows.
Adultery is one of the most terrible "facts of life" in contemporary America. If you watch the daily soap operas on TV many of which are just soft-core pornography you might get the impression that there are more people cheating on their spouses than remaining faithful. And you might be right.
How many people have affairs? That's hard to say because not everybody will answer honestly. But sex therapist Peggy Vaughan, author of The Monogamy Myth conservatively estimates that about 60 percent of married men and 40 percent of married women will have an affair at some time during their marriage. Maggie Scarf, author of Intimate Partners basically agrees.
Since these books were written more than a decade ago, and since more women are leaving the home and entering the workforce, the number of wives having affairs may also have reached the 60 percent range.
Americans have a schizophrenic attitude toward adultery.
While 90 percent admit that adultery is morally wrong, according to a Time-CNN poll, 50 percent say that President Bill Clinton's morals are "about the same as the average married man." While 35 percent think that adultery should be a crime, 61 percent think it shouldn't.
Having an affair simply doesn't carry the social stigma that it once did.
According to Playboy magazine, 2 out of 3 women and 3 out of 4 men have sexual thoughts about their coworkers, and about the same number follow through on those libidinous impulses.
Why do husbands and wives cheat on their spouses? Psychologists cite subjective issues like loss of love and feelings of alienation. Certainly the media pressure of our sex-saturated society is a significant influence.
But a major factor is the easy availability of cheap and plentiful Internet pornography.
Statistics show that 25 percent of all Internet search engine requests are related to pornography.
According to the National Coalition for the Protection of Children and Families, "approximately 40 million people in the United States are sexually involved with the Internet." And while 76 percent of women feel that phone sex or cyber-sex is the equivalent of committing adultery, only 41 percent of men do.
Dr. Alvin Cooper and MSNBC.com conducted an online poll of 38,000 people, and 10 percent admitted that they were addicted to Internet pornography.
What's more, a lot of those Internet sex addicts eventually progress from cyber-sex to real-time sexual affairs.
Some legal professionals estimate that as many as one-third of all divorces may have their roots in Internet porn or online affairs. "If there's dissatisfaction in the existing relationship, the Internet is an easy way for people to scratch the itch," explains J. Lindsey Short, Jr., president of the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers.
The pain and suffering caused by adultery is immense, especially for children. They are more likely never to marry, or to later divorce, if they had divorced or cheating parents. After a divorce, many children are unable ever to develop strong, trusting relationships.
There is a direct correlation between the steady decline of morals and values in America and this more accepting contemporary attitude toward adultery. Part of the reason is because most people have forgotten what a marriage really is.
Marriage is more than just a legal status recognized by the state, or even a temporary social contract between two people.
True marriage is a solemn covenant relationship between a man, a woman and God. It is a hallowed institution that should be revered, cherished, and preserved.
The act of adultery is childish and selfish, and it hurts everyone involved.
It violates at least two of the Ten Commandments: the clear prohibitions against committing adultery and coveting your neighbor's spouse.
If we care about the future of our great nation, we as a people must relearn the virtue and necessity of staying committed to the spouses to whom we are married.
Hahahaha... good one. Yup, you can cross me off that list. Definitely won't be taking it in. Thanks for thinking of me though lol.
I remember that story from Scores, sad. Oh well, what can you do? When a city loses its strip club edge, it's all over!
I haven't been there, but apparently there's a club downtown where hipsters are trying to revive the "art" of burlesque.
Romans 5:10 For if, when we were enemies, we were reconciled to God by the death of his Son, much more, being reconciled, we shall be saved by his life. 11 And not only so, but we also joy in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, by whom we have now received the atonement. 12 Wherefore, as by one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin; and so death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned.
Let me ask you a question. Do you have joy in your life? The joy of knowing your sins are forgiven? That you were once condemned to an eternal hell but were miraculously saved from it? That it didn't cost anything other than a little faith? Depressed? Far from it. It is the folks that don't have this promise firmly in their grasp that have reason to be depressed.
My guy's father gave him one of the best explanations I've heard concerning why he would never commit adultery. Aside from loving his wife - he said that "it's just incredibly rude."
Putting your own needs above those of your spouse and family - is the ultimate inconsiderate act.
i guess marriage is not defined the same throughout out country?
I'm sure he feels the sameway.
Reading your comment and then seeing your screen name cracked me up!
Honor is in very short supply these days. Glad to see there are a few of us who value this virtue.
Appreciation of the female form is
human nature,we are all victims of old sin nature.or human nature. many of us men would not have selected you females,if it werent in part for human nature. For all have sinned and come short of the glory of god. Now we know ,we are devoted to you as husbands,but we dont have any problems appreciating the beauty of the female form.now liking the physical apearance of the opposite sex is far from adultery.Adultery is behaving as husband and wife,not goin to the beach and sayin ,wow!
.
Yeah, I could see this guy picking out smooth rocks in my mind.
Alriiiiiiighty then.
No doubt, more than a few would agree with the obvious.
I can instantly see what's wrong with your equation. Most marriages aren't childless and there aren't any children in your equation. Try again.
Now that's the honest truth.
Bet that line didn't work on the playground either.
Adulterers, pedophiles, and rapists are just misunderstood...
The prevalence of non-judgmental liberalism in our entertainment and education has taken away the moral boundaries that once restrained the more animalistic tendencies of our base human nature.
There is no doubt that us men like sex and are tempted from time to time to have extra marital sex. The subversive thought that the temptation and the act of giving into that temptation are healthy expressions of our masculinity and are not morally wrong goes a long way to encouraging men to take that step. The universally found justification for adultery is that it was always the other spouse's fault.
More and more I've been hearing rapists and pedophiles using the same thinking in their excuses. More and more we're seeing men and women committing crimes who wouldn't be committing those crimes if they had been brought up to have a stronger moral guide.
I like this gauge, and it reminds me of another. Something emotionally bad happens. How to deal with it? Would you be willing to cut-off a pinky or perhaps undergo a root canal to prevent it? In essence, trading off different levels of physical discomforture to deal with the mental. Kinda puts things into perspective.
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