Posted on 09/17/2005 6:59:48 AM PDT by teldon30
Dear Amy: I'd like to be in a relationship again, but I never even get asked out (unless you count frisky 85-year-olds and drunks at the corner bar). I'm a 32-year-old woman who's happy, sociable, and attractive. (I paid for college by modeling and continue to take care of myself.) I'm second-in-command at a big company, financially secure, and own a beautiful home. How can I meet men in general, and more specifically, men I'd actually want to date?
Deluxe Chopped Liver
Dear Deluxe: To scare away vampires, it takes garlic and crosses, which make ugly bulges in sleek, satin evening bags. Luckily, all you have to do to scare away men is pull out a business card that says ''senior vice president.''
''Power is the ultimate aphrodisiac,'' said Henry Kissinger. Sure it is unless you're a woman. Research by Stephanie L. Brown and Brian P. Lewis, published in Evolution and Human Behavior (Nov. '04), seems to confirm what many lonely women at the top already know: When guys go for the woman in the boardroom, it isn't the woman running the meeting but the secretary who wheeled in the coffee and croissants before it started.
Sure, plenty of men will scamper up the corporate ladder for a one-night stand. But, according to Brown and Lewis' study, men looking for dates or relationships tend to prefer their subordinates to their colleagues or bosses. The researchers hypothesize that men evolved to want women they can control as a means of guarding against ''parental uncertainty'' unwittingly raising kids fathered by the Neanderthal next door as their own. Brown and Lewis think this may also explain why men are suckers for ''behavioral expressions of vulnerability'' women who act like they might not be able to make it across the street
(Excerpt) Read more at mcall.com ...
The one and only purpose of getting married is to make babies. Guys are looking for chicks who want babies, not beemers.
I do not know ANY guy that is looking for a chick that wants babies. Most of the men I know run away screaming when the subject comes up. I think that men these days want: 1) a woman that's going to be a wage earner so they don't have to do it all themselves and 2) a woman that will let them watch the ballgame in peace. Where do the babies come into it?
And I'd love input from the peanut gallery on this one! BTW- I am 30 so maybe it's just my generation, but all the guys in my generation that I know want nothing to do with commitment or kids, so I'd love to hear from some that do. AND----keep in mind that when I say "most of the men I know" it does NOT include very many attorneys- maybe one or two. Most of the guys I know are every day normal nonprofessionals.
OK, so I want to hear from the guys on this one--do you men REALLY take a look at a woman expecting to be divorced from her someday? Do you look and say "if/when we get divorced on what level would I get screwed?"
That is so sad!
OK, so I want to hear from the guys on this one--do you men REALLY take a look at a woman expecting to be divorced from her someday? Do you look and say "if/when we get divorced on what level would I get screwed?"
That is so sad!
Oh please. I am a male. I get asked out. I have never considered less of the women simply because they did the asking. Indeed, some of those were the best dates I ever had, because I knew from the outset that they were indeed interested in Me and no games were necessary -other than those we were both interested in. Indeed, some if the women I had not considered asking out made Me reconsider when they asked Me out. Nothing wrong with a little mutual attraction.
But how to fight it other than that- OK so I am an attorney and guys have a hangup about it- so what then, I am just doomed?
I swear this fixer-upper house must have been waiting for me to find it, to be the reason I took up smithing, since I have this 'thing' for functional art such as staircase railings, and this house has the perfect staircase just begging to be worked over.
Alas, too many projects, not enough ~me~
:-)
Yeah, how about Ann Coulter? LOL Thanks for the vote of confidence tulip tree ;-)
How true. Unfortunately, where I live we tend to have to watch out for bears and other wild animals even close to town when we do that, especially in the late fall or early spring. Ten to fifteen miles out and greater you need to add fox and mountain lions to the list of possible food-thieves.
Agreed, mate. Nothing wrong with being asked out by an honest woman who is actually uninterested in mind-games and willing to spend a bit of quality time with someone they are genuinely interested in.
And the really hardcore ones probably lay the blame for the failures of feminazism right at the feet of those eeevil men. Gotta be their fault somehow!
Lol. I believe you may be on to something, Mr. Anti-Spicegirls crusader. I was seeing a lass some months back who despite things getting quite serious between us up and decided one day that she needed some time just to be single and free (and date around some) before getting into a serious relationship. I was quite disappointed, as I had invested a great amount of time and effort into things, and this sudden change of direction just made Me feel as gobsmacked as you can possibly imagine. Long story short, she has been making more and stronger efforts to contact Me, and the more I put her off because I know what a totally unreliable propect she is, the more she leaves Me messages like 'I just want to talk', 'why wont you answer me', 'cant you even just say hello', etc. The more I try to stay out of her sights the more she appears determined to continue. Talk about bloody confusing, I mean; she made her decision, why is she bothering Me now?
I didn't say security was solely based on financial means... I said it also includes it.
Well that all revolves around how you define "apart from Him" doesn't it?
I dare say the interpretation under consideration here puts itself at odds with the parable of the talents.
I believe both are true, but that the notion of proclaiming something is or is not done "in Christ" is as misunderstood as the notion the Scriptures teach a geocentric universe, or that the parable of the leaven teaches a universal evangelization.
As for good fruit, what kind do you want?
Hmmmm. Won't take "no" for and answer, huh?
Where have we heard that before?
Nonetheless I still reject your argument out of hand. My fiance NEVER cared how much money I made -indeed, when we met she already had roughly ten times as much financial assets than I did and knew that if we did formally get together and eventually marry that she would experience a much more difficult lifestyle when her family disowned her (they disliked Me intensely), but she did not care. She told Me more than once that at least we would have love, and that mattered to her more than anything.
Too, I have had women ask Me point blank how much I make, and I instantly respond that that was not a topic that was up for discussion, and shouldn't they care more for an indvidual than the monetary contributions he would be putting on the table? Because if that was what they were looking for then best say our goodbyes now, as I was not searching for a potential Hole In Pocket experience.
Oddly enough, on the few occasions when we have communicated recently, I refuse to discuss My personal life and concentrate on the weather, My garden, and watering the lawn -and the more I make her understand (by not discussing the more personal topics with her) that I am NOT interested, the more interest she appears to generate. Women really ARE from another planet!
I'm a woman and can only opine as a woman. Women do consider financial stability as something they consider when deciding whether or not to enter into a long term relationship.
I dare say her highness refuses to entertain the preposterous notion she has been rejected...at least insofar as you haven't made it explicit to her, anyway.
And I take issue with YOUR over-generalization. I posess a slightly higher intelligence or so I have been told, and truly enjoy interacting with a woman capable of equality with Me, however I have met very few that were noticeably more intelligent than I -and please, that is not a vain or intentional insult towards women. I also have had to modify My speech at times because certain females definitely have issues dealing with a member of the opposite sex who is not the typical dumb-as-a-rock-clueless-male stereotype and is capable of communicating intelligently using words greater than the three-syllable maximum that some appear to be most comfortable with given the choice.
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