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Crusader Nabbed By Michigan Cops
the smoking gun ^
| August 5, 2005
| the smoking gun
Posted on 08/07/2005 3:20:08 AM PDT by Antioch
Medieval sword, mallet, armor no match for ye olde Taser
Meet Robert McClain. The Michigan man, 42, was arrested last week after he attempted to literally go medieval on cops. According to the below Royal Oak Police Department report, officers were dispatched to McClain's home after a motorist called 911 to report that McClain had fled the scene of an auto accident. When they arrived at his crib, McClain allegedly tried to strike a cop with a four-foot sword. After missing, McClain retreated to his basement, where he donned a chainmail armored vest and leather gauntlets to protect his arms. He also added a giant wooden mallet to his arsenal and beckoned officers to come downstairs and get him. "I'm gonna crush your f*cking skulls," McClain warned. Then, in a nice rhetorical flourish (for a lunatic, at least), he added, "I have a thousand years of power." That omnipotence, however, was no match for a police Taser, which felled McClain. He was then carted off and charged with felony assault and a misdemeanor count for failing to remain at an accident scene.
TOPICS: Crime/Corruption; Culture/Society; Miscellaneous; News/Current Events
KEYWORDS: chainmail; medieval; psychopath
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1
posted on
08/07/2005 3:20:08 AM PDT
by
Antioch
To: Antioch
There's got to be some sort of proverb or anecdote in response to this story...
Never wear stainless steel to a fight involving an electrical discharge?
Never bring a 4 foot broadsword to a taser fight?
A "thousand years of power" is no equal to a brand new Taser gun and an itchy trigger finger?
2
posted on
08/07/2005 3:29:47 AM PDT
by
Caipirabob
(Democrats.. Socialists..Commies..Traitors...Who can tell the difference?)
To: Antioch
3
posted on
08/07/2005 3:30:08 AM PDT
by
Deetes
(God Bless the Troops and their Family's)
To: Caipirabob
What about the "giant wooden mallet"???
BWAHAHAHA !!!!!
4
posted on
08/07/2005 3:31:49 AM PDT
by
Deetes
(God Bless the Troops and their Family's)
To: Antioch
That omnipotence, however, was no match for a police TaserSometimes police work can be a lot of fun.
To: Antioch
It's only a voltage wound! I'm only slightly stunned!
6
posted on
08/07/2005 3:34:41 AM PDT
by
palmer
(If you see flies at the entrance to the burrow, the ground hog is probably inside)
To: Antioch
'He also added a giant wooden mallet to his arsenal and beckoned officers to come downstairs and get him. "I'm gonna crush your f*cking skulls"' Its all fun and games till someone gets there "f%*ing skull crushed"!!!!
7
posted on
08/07/2005 3:37:42 AM PDT
by
Mad Dawgg
("`Eddies,' said Ford, `in the space-time continuum.' `Ah,' nodded Arthur, `is he? Is he?'")
To: Antioch
Wonder what kind of Witches Brew he was on?
8
posted on
08/07/2005 3:38:46 AM PDT
by
leadpenny
To: Antioch
"Now I know what you're thinking, punk. Did he fire 6 shots or only 5?
Well it really doesn't matter seeing as at 50,000 volts this is the most
powerful tazer in the world and will shock your socks cleeeeean off..."
9
posted on
08/07/2005 3:42:15 AM PDT
by
UnbelievingScumOnTheOtherSide
(Give Them Liberty Or Give Them Death! - IT'S ISLAM, STUPID! - Islam Delenda Est! - Rumble thee forth)
To: Dan from Michigan
Whew! for a minute there I thought this might be you;)
10
posted on
08/07/2005 3:48:37 AM PDT
by
ChefKeith
(If Diplomacy worked, then we would be sitting here talking.)
To: Antioch
"
... When they arrived at his crib ...Was his moms home?
11
posted on
08/07/2005 3:54:14 AM PDT
by
MrBambaLaMamba
(Buy 'Allah' brand urinal cakes - If you can't kill the enemy at least you can piss on their god)
To: Antioch
12
posted on
08/07/2005 4:02:36 AM PDT
by
kcvl
To: Antioch
When they arrived at his crib ebonics?
13
posted on
08/07/2005 4:05:40 AM PDT
by
sure_fine
(*not one to over kill the thought process*)
To: Caipirabob
Never wear stainless steel to a fight involving an electrical discharge? First off never wear stainless steel period. Stainless steel is not a martial metal. Only an idiot would use a stainless steel sword or armor.
14
posted on
08/07/2005 4:09:42 AM PDT
by
Pelayo
To: martin_fierro
15
posted on
08/07/2005 4:13:37 AM PDT
by
ovrtaxt
(Logic test: Pearl Harbor is to 911 as Harry Truman is to .....)
To: Antioch
To: Antioch
17
posted on
08/07/2005 4:25:29 AM PDT
by
tomakaze
(Cuius testiculos habes, habeas cardia et cerebellum.)
To: Antioch
To: Antioch
19
posted on
08/07/2005 4:33:00 AM PDT
by
nuconvert
(No More Axis of Evil by Christmas ! TLR) [there's a lot of bad people in the pistachio business])
To: Antioch
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