How I Wish Rumsfeld Had Answered Kennedy Yesterday, Part I

The following is a fictitious exerpt from the testimony of Donald Rumsfeld before the Senate Armed Services Committee, June 23, 2005

Mr. Kennedy: Mr Secretary, this war has been grossly mismanaged and we are stuck in an intractable quagmire, isn’t it about time you accpeted your egregious failure and resigned to save more American kids lives?

Mr. Rumsfeld: Wow, well you cut me sir. Let me answer by asking a few questions of my own.

Mr. Kennedy: This panel is here to ask the questions, not answer them, that is totally out of line.

Mr. Rumsfeld: Well, it will help me frame my answers, indulge me sir. I mean, you have just accused me of the worst failure – of incompetence, so I would like to fully flesh out an answer for you.

Mr. Rumsfeld: First, sir. Do YOU actually believe what you just said to me? The reason I ask that is in April, when I was last before this body, you attacked me with greater energy and passion. Are you unwell? Or, are sou starting to doubt your own overblown hyperbole? I don’t mean this to be disrespctful, I am concerned about your health. You don’t look well at all, you’re ruddy faced and you look terribly bloated. Are you truly well enough to participate at these hearings?

Kennedy: That’s out of line, I am here to do my job and I will do it with my last dying breath. Answer my question, when should an incompetent Secretary of Defense?... shouldn’t you resign Mr. Secretary, based on your mismanagement of the Iraq War?

Rumsfeld: Do you really believe that I am incompetent or are you making a point for thelevision? Am I here to help this body understand what’s going on, or to help you score political points for the extreme left of your party?

Kennedy: That is completely out of line, Mr. Secretary, and you will be in contempt of congress if you continue in that vain.

Rumsfeld: I’m sorry Mr. Senator, that question was more rhetorical than anything else, I’ll refrain from that in the future.

Rumsfeld: Just one more question, sir. Have you ever read the Memoirs of Bui Tin?

Kennedy: I read a great number of things, Mr. Secretary, what is Bui Tin? (chamber laughter)

Rumsfeld: It it the story of his career as a General under Ho Chi Min during the Vietnam War.

Kennedy: We are not talking about Vietnam. That was 30, no nearly 40 years ago, we are talking about your incompetence and whether it is time for you to resign because of the disaster you have created in Iraq.

Rumsfeld: I bring it up because this former Communist makes a compelling...a passionate case that the Vietnamese didn’t win the Vietnam war, the US lost that war. And the US lost that war, in his words not mine, because of the constant barrage from the left attacking the War and the objectives. And, I bring it up now because history is repeating itself right now in these proceedings.

Kennedy: You’re in contempt, Mr. Rumsfeld, Mr Chairman I move that the Secretary be censured, be held in contempt of Congress

Warner: Too bad, (laughter) I can tell, let the man finish, he’s answering your question.

Warner: Senator, sit down, you asked the man a question, a very nasty question, now stay for his answer!

Rumsfeld: In his book, Mr. Bui Tin, Colonel Bui Tin makes states very plainly that the Kremlin was takling a very keen interest in the goings on in Vietnam aznd that their rear guard was completely in check, their people were kept in in line by the threat of brutality of the communist leadership in Hanoi. He further points out that the situation was exactly the opposite for the Americans. That the activist leftisits, who were recieving funding from the Kremlin, were having a profoundly negative effect on morale and on America’s will to win. He states that there was no quagmire in Vietnam except the fictional one created in the public’s consciouness by the leftists. He speaks of the incredible benefits to Hanoi in this verbal war, this war that was raging here in America, benefits from testimony from people like John Kerry when he was a soldier and from Jane Fonda’s mission to Saigon. And, the reason I bring it up now is that we are in danger of repeating the same mistake, this time to the benefit of the Islamic extremists we are fighting.

Kennedy: This is incredible, this is too much, I won’t stand for having my patriotism questioned.

Rumsfeld: I am in no way questioning your patritism, Mr. Senator. I’m am sure you have the best interests of the nation at heart, there is no doubt in my mind. However, I believe you are being used as an unwitting tool of powerful elements on the Left who want to see America fail. They are working to make the mighty humble and I think you may be unwittingly doing their handiwork.

Kennedy: This is outrageous, you are out of line Mr. Secretary, Mr. Chairman I ask, no I demand that the Secretary be censured and held in contempt...

Warner: We will do no such thing, I agree with the man and if we were to poll the committee, I’m sure you would find that many of us do. In fact you may be one of the few people up here who really think Mr. Rumsfeld is, how did you put it, incompetent?

Kennedy: Fine, you may contiunue, Mr. Rumsfeld, but remember your words may come back to haunt you.

Rumsfeld: Is that a threat of some kind, Mr. Kennedy? I’m almost finished.

Kennedy: Nothing. Continue with your statement (under his breath) since it'll be your last.

Rumsfeld: Well, I just want to conclude by saying that the contant negativity, the constant drumbeat of defeatism emanating from the Left which you are so eloquently sending out here, today, in these proceedings, in the question you just posed to me; that in waging this internal war on our military, you, your party Senator, is repeating the mistakes of the past. The only quagmire exists is the one you are conjuring up by your leftist friends.

Rumsfeld: The truth of the matter is that wars are messy. There are no pefect wars. The only perfect war is fought on a desktop with figurines. I think it’s evident that we (gesturing to his leadership) are all working as hard as is humanly possible to prevail in this current conflict and I know you will not find a more professional, more motivated, more well trained and passionate fighting force than the US Armed Forces and frankly your rhetoric does them an injustice and gives aid and comfort to the enemy, just as it did during the Vietnam War. (The chamber erupts in wild applause.)

Now as to whether I should resign, well the President has an un dated leter of resignation from me in his files, he can accept it any time he likes. Thank you Mr. Chairrman

2 posted on 06/24/2005 1:57:22 PM PDT by potlatch (Does a clean house indicate that there is a broken computer in it?)

3 posted on 06/24/2005 1:58:30 PM PDT by bassmaner (Let's take the word "liberal" back from the commies!!)

Kennedy is the last person who should be asking questions.

Rumsfeld should have carried a picture of Mary Jo with him and showed it to Teddy.

Rummy: "Senator Swimmer, do you speak Sign Language?"

My extreme fantasy:

Rumsfeld walks up to the speaker's table, sits down and pulls a framed photograph of Mary Jo Kopechny and sets it on the table, facing the senators. Then he calmly announces,

"I couldn't find a crucifix, a silver bullet, or a wooden stake.

6 posted on 06/24/2005 2:17:24 PM PDT by Publius6961 (The most abundant things in the universe are ignorance, stupidity and hydrogen)

Kennedy: That’s out of line, I am here to do my job and I will do it with my last dying breath.

Please, dear Lord, let it be soon...real soon.

All he had to do to drive Kennedy from the building would have been to say: "You, sir, have the blood of a million Viets on your hands; your hands are awash in the blood of Montagnards, Cambodians and Laotians. You went behind President Reagan's back to form alliances with the Politburo and the KGB. And in the final analysis you, sir, are a coward and your bullying techniques will not work on me.

I saw this on the news yesterday. Here's what I think took place. I think Kennedy took a letter from a disgruntled constituent, made a couple changes, then tried to use it against Secretary Rumsfeld.

The original letter probably read:

Senator Kennedy, this Senate has been grossly mismanaged and we are stuck in an intractable quagmire, isn’t it about time you accepted your egregious failure and resigned to save more American kids lives?

I would like Rumsfeld to read from Teddy's father's disgraceful Trafalgar Day speech in 1940, an incredibly defeatist and negative review of the British chances in World War 2.That would underscore the point that we've had defeatists and sympathizers with the enemy in all our wars. Kennedy Sr. was pro-Nazi also.

The fact is, that leftist drunk gotta away with his nastiness.

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