BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA -- John Kerry relied on info from the ONION for his voter irregularities BS

Larry Elder show | 4-11-05 | dfu

[doug from upland]

This is just too good. Larry Elder was just talking about John Kerry and his whining claims of voter irregularities that cost him the election. After all, he just had to turn around 60,000 votes in Ohio and we would have a first lady telling people to shove it from the White House.

One of Kerry's claims is that messages were being given to DemocRAT voters that Republicans vote on Tuesday and RATS on Wednesday. Well, John, it was not a dirty trick. The info was satire and published in . . . . . . . . . . THE ONION!

Yes, Kerry is relying on a satirical piece to claim something that didn't happen. Good grief. We are so lucky that this idiot and traitor is not residing at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue.

[mcg1969]

Wow, it's really unbelievable that people would fall for Billy the Burlap Boy too.

[mountainlyons]

There were voter irregularities. 30,000 absentee ballots to GI'S overseas did not return!

[queenkathy]

Just one question....Who is John Kerry? Never heard of him...

[Rocky]

I'm sure this made the day for the author of the Onion story.

[Darkwolf377]

It's funny watching Kerry trying to be so ON, and falling on his face--if he wasn't already on crutches he's need some anyway.

Of course, if BUSH said this, he'd be a laughing stock in the media for WEEKS. I suspect we will not see this reported in the MSM.

[mystery-ak]

Ha...I had this as my tag line for a while before the election......LOL

[SupplySider]

He's delusional, like Clinton and Gore.

Clinton talked himself into his own hype that Ken Starr was a sex-obsessed purtian bent on his destruction. Gore, after trying to fix the Florida recount, actually believes the election was stolen from him.

Apparently Kerry believes his own propaganda points, too. It's kind of frightening.

[CompSciGuy]

I think Ben would agree ;-)

Cheers,

CSG

[Cyber Liberty]

I am a very sick little boy. My mother is typing this for me, because I can't. She is crying. Don't cry, Mommy! Mommy is always sad, but she says it's not my fault. I asked her if it was God's fault, but she didn't answer, and only started crying harder, so I don't ask her that anymore. The reason she is so sad is that I'm so sick. I was born without a body. It doesn't hurt, except when I go to sleep.
The doctors gave me an artificial body. My body is a burlap bag filled with leaves. The doctors said that was the best they could do on account of us havin' no money or insurance. I would like to have a body transplant, but we need more money. Mommy doesn't work because she said employers don't hire crying people. I said, "Don't cry, Mommy," and she hugged my burlap body. Mommy always gives me hugs, even though she's allergic to burlap, and it chafes her real bad.

I hope you will help me. You can help me if you forward this e-mail. Dr. Johansen said if you foward this e-mail then Bill Gates will team up with AOL and do a survey with NASA. Then the astronauts will collect prayers from school children all over America and take them up to space so that the angels can hear them better. Then they will go to the Pope, and he will take up a collection in church and send the money to the doctors. The doctors could help me better then.

Maybe one day I will be able to play baseball. Or maybe just use my lungs and heart, when the doctors make them. The doctors said that every time you foward this letter, the astronauts can take another prayer to the angels. Please help me. Mommy is so sad, and I want a body. I don't want my leaves to rot before I turn 10.

If you don't foward this e-mail, that's OK. Mommy says you're a mean heartless person who doesn't care about a poor little boy with only a head. She says that she hopes that you stew in the raw pit of your own guilt-ridden stomach. What kind of wretched person are you that you can't take five lousy minutes to forward this to all your friends so that they can feel guilt and shame for the rest of their day, and then maybe help a poor, bodiless nine-year-old boy?

Please help me. This really sucks. I try to be happy but it's hard. I wish

I had a puppy. I wish I could hold a puppy.

Thank You.
Billy 'Smiles' Evans,
The boy with just a head.
And a burlap sack for a body.

[CyberAnt]

and hugh

[maggief]

http://election.kcrg.com/article.aspx?id=91973

KCJJ's Election Joke Irks Republicans
By Craig Brown
KCRG-TV9 News Reporter
Tuesday, November 02, 2004, 12:37:24 AM

Video

IOWA CITY-- An Eastern Iowa radio station has come under fire for a DJ's comment about when Iowans should head to the polls. The DJ insists it was just a joke, but the Republican Party isn't laughing.

Popular disc jockey Steve Soboroff, know as "Captain Steve" to his loyal listeners at KCJJ in Iowa City, never dreamed his little joke would get this far. Soboroff told his Monday morning audience due to the record amount of voters, Democrats will vote on Tuesday and Republicans on Wednesday Thursday and Friday. "It was said in jest, it was very apparent that it was said in jest. I also said that Republicans were charging 5 and a quarter at the polls for the pencils to fill in the ballots," said a chuckling Soboroff.

It may have been intended as a joke, but the local Republicans think it could be damaging misinformation. "It shouldn't be a laughing matter at all," said Johnson County Republican Co-Chair Todd Versteegh.

The Johnson County Republicans have filed an ethics complaint with the state election board. They're also investigating steps to file a complaint with the FCC and the Federal Election Commission. The republicans say they're appalled, and believe the comment may have confused elderly voters. "This close to an election, this type of behavior should not be tolerated at all by either Republicans or Democrats," said Versteegh.

The Republicans are also upset that Democratic County Supervisor Terrence Neuzil was on the air at the time. But Neuzil told TV9, Soboroff's comment was obviously a joke.

Just to be clear, everyone; Democrats, Republicans and all others will all head to the polls Tuesday.

[BROKKANIC]

I was under the impression that the line... "Republicans vote on Tuesday and Democrats on Wednesday." was coined on the Glenn Beck show. He even had a massive waffle head of John Kerry driving around blasting that phrase over a PA.

[nopardons]

Apparently yes. LOL

[oolatec]

Anyone have a link to the original Onion article?

[hosepipe]

[ Yes, Kerry is relying on a satirical piece to claim something that didn't happen. Good grief. We are so lucky that this idiot and traitor is not residing at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. ]

The pitiful thing is it was a bit of luck...
The luck being the Swifys... and that he is a poodle..
American women don't seem to have a problem with their politicians being unstable in all their ways.. and veritable liars.

[JOE6PAK]

BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

[JOE6PAK]

I think RUSH did this Tuesday / Wednesday gag years ago.

[Sidebar Moderator]

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[Finny]

I hear ya, Stan ... but Larry Elder is a former very conservative Libertarian who recently converted (!) to Republican. He's on OUR side, and is no friend of Kerry, Liberals, or MoveOn. Give him a listen if you ever get a chance ... he's great. The Sage of South Central!