Colin Farrell, right, stars as Alexander the Great, with Angelina Jolie and Val Kilmer as his parents. (Courtesy Warner Bros.)
Posted on 12/29/2004 1:34:50 AM PST by JohnHuang2
Wednesday, December 29, 2004
MEDIA MATTERS
Homosexual 'Alexander'
on life support
Warner about to pull plug on $200 million 'gigantic fiasco'
Warner Brothers is about to give up on its $200 million epic depicting Alexander the Great as a homosexual.
Colin Farrell, right, stars as Alexander the Great, with Angelina Jolie and Val Kilmer as his parents. (Courtesy Warner Bros.) |
Fox News Entertainment columnist Roger Friedman says "Alexander," starring Colin Farrell, Angelina Jolie and Val Kilmer, has become a "gigantic fiasco," the company's biggest since Kevin Costner's "The Postman" earned just $17 million.
The film grossed just $41,000 on only 232 screens over the Christmas holiday weekend, translating into $177 per show.
With a total gross of $33.9 million in its sixth week, the film likely will be dumped soon, Friedman says.
"Warner Brothers must be scratching its collective head right now," said Friedman.
Reviewer Jeffery Westfoff of the Northwest Hearld in Crystal Lake, Ill., wrote "'Alexander' often seems a couple of heartbeats away from turning into a gay porno film."
Philip Wuntch of the Dallas Morning News said, "'Alexander' has aspirations of greatness, hoping to be christened an intellectual super-spectacle for brainy moviegoers. The sad truth is that it will probably numb more brain cells than it will stimulate."
Wuntch notes that in the film, "Alexander prefers the after-hours company of men, considering women to be necessary primarily for reproductive reasons. His true soul mate is boyhood companion Hephaistion [Jared Leto], to whom he says softly, 'I'm nothing without you.' They never exchange an onscreen kiss, but their eyes constantly caress each other."
I'm glad I haven't wasted money on that one, from what I heard about it.
BWHAHAHAHA!!!!!!
Couldn't happen to a better director. That's ok, Ollie Stoner, there is always Eurostan!
:-)
What's next? Gay Atilla the Hun?
BWAHAAA!!!!!!
No, Gaydolf Hitler!
Been a bad month for me. I'll get over it. Lost my cat even! =o(
I was just getting offline when I noticed you were posting
Mainstream America won't spend money on gay films. Not now, not ever.
Howdy, amigo! Sorry to hear about your cat, tho.
My sentiments exactly ;-)
Want another one?
Ditto what you said.
um.. probably not for a while. Loved my Wanderer! Had him since... well, AT.. birth.
Wanderer's birth that is. Just a few years ago. hehe... see his pic on my FR profile page.
Hmmm, with a motto like that I should drive over to Rush's house and dump her in HIS driveway.
Yep, that's a pretty gay looking trio up there!
"Biggus Dickus" carried a far more commanding screen presence than anyone in "Alexander".
Pontius Pilate: What's, ehm...funny about Biggus Dickus?
Centurion: Well, it's a joked name, sir.
Pontius Pilate: I have a vevy gveat fviend in Vome called Biggus Dickus.
Legionary III: Pffhrpffpfff...
Pontius Pilate: Silence! What is all this insolence? You will find yourself in gladiator school vevy quickly, with votten behaviouv like that.
Brian: Can I go now, sir?
Centurion's hand against Brian's cheek: [Slap]
Brian: Aie! Aou...
Pontius Pilate: Wait till Biggus Dickus hears of this!
Legionary III: Pffhrpffpfff...
Pontius Pilate: Vight! Take him away!
Centurion: Oh sir, he just...
Pontius Pilate: No, no, I want him fighting wabid wild animals within a week!
Centurion: Yes, sir. Come on, you!
Legionary III: Oh, hahahaha...hohoho! Hoho...
Pontius Pilate: I will not have my friends ridiculed by the common soldiery! Anybody else feel like a little...giggle, when I mention my friend...Biggus...Dickus?
Legionary IV: Pffhrpffpfff...
Pontius Pilate: And what about you? Do you find it...risible, when I say the name...Biggus...
Legionary IV: Iik!
Pontius Pilate: ...Dickus?
Legionaries I and II: Pffhrpffpfff...hihihi...
Pontius Pilate: He has a wife, you know. Do you know what she's called? She's called...Incontinentia. Incontinentia Buttocks.
All legionaries: Pffhrpffpfff...hahaha...
Pontius Pilate: Shut up! What is all this? I've had enough of this wowdy webel, spickely behaviour! Silence! You call yourselves Pawaetonian guards? Seize him! Seize him! Blow your noses and seize him!
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