Posted on 11/29/2004 1:59:05 PM PST by Clive
My fella and I were going out of town. He was driving his "super reliable" car into which he pours nothing less than premium gas and synthetic oil and which, incidentally, is so much better and safer than my car that the two can never even be compared.
To boot, his car just got a tune-up and that became the launching point for a lecture about car maintenance habits and how I do not have any.
He should know. He's been working on my car all weekend. So blah, blah, I never check my oil (I forget), my tire pressure (um, my tire pressure measuring stick is broken), my radiator fluid (as if I even know where my radiator fluid is ...) and so on and so forth.
In fact, my car is in such shoddy shape, I should not even drive it anymore. Instead, I should just drive his car (which I'll simply refer to as super reliable from now on) but I have to remember not to start it in second gear because that WRECKS HIS CLUTCH.
In passing, my car-savvy fella mentioned that during his tune-up, the mechanic told him to consider replacing an ignition module or something of that sort. The mechanic, my fella concludes, is probably wrong and there is no problem with the car.
You should listen to the mechanic, I said, using up all the car advice I felt authorized to give. With your luck (he has the worst luck of anyone I know) the car will break down in the middle of a road trip and you'll be stuck there forever.
About 45 minutes later we were sitting on the side of the highway with the hazard lights on waiting for a tow truck.
That's right, Mr. Awesome-car-care-premium-gas-guy was digging around under the hood swearing and, to make matters worse, we gave the tow truck the wrong directions and were stranded for almost two hours at sub-zero temperatures in a car that would not start.
Two hundred bucks later, super reliable was in the shop and is there still, waiting for several hundred bucks worth of parts and labour.
In the meantime, the car's owner is driving my car (the one that does not have enough radiator fluid, the back doors do not open and is, overall, totally unreliable) to work.
Before I point out why this episode confirmed my attitude towards vehicles, consider this.
A couple of years ago I was driving my super junky K-Car along Highway 2.
I was just past Leduc when my tire seemingly exploded.
I pulled over, stupidly, on the left side of the highway and immediately realized I was stuck in the middle of six lanes of whizzing highway traffic.
I got out of the car, examined the tire (yep, it was flat) and pondered what to do next. I decided to walk to Nisku and call someone.
But before the traffic subsided for long enough to cross to the other side of the highway, some guy had already pulled over, put on my spare and asked me out for coffee.
Now I know I should learn how to change a flat and check my air tire pressure, but where's my incentive?
Obviously obsessive car maintenance, synthetic oil and all, does not eliminate breaking down on the side of the road.
Furthermore, if all of a sudden I learned to care about my spark plugs or my air filter, then so many guys would be deprived of the car-related lectures and rescues in which they secretly delight.
Besides, not knowing anything about cars means I generally listen to my mechanic when he says something needs to be fixed.
And let's face it, if it had been me driving ol' super reliable when it broke down, I could have got a ride back to town, and probably coffee, instead of trying not to die from the frost while waiting for the tow truck.
Reminds me...
Saw a car the other night with taillights that were half full with water. Could see the water sloshing around inside every time the car hit a bump or went around a corner.
The light bulbs worked fine. Reminded me of those bubbling XMAS tree ornaments.
A '60 Chevy Biscayne 4-door, lovingly dubbed "the Tank". I sideswiped a guardrail on Christmas Day 1970, causing the driver's door to lean out at the top. I got it partly worked back in by opening the door, jacking up that back edge of the door with a floor jack, and whacking the bottom hinge with a sledge hammer from the inside. It actually reduced the gap at the top from about 4 inches to a half an inch...The cops never did find out who destroyed the end of the guardrail....I ran to crap out of that car, and finally drove it to the junkyard, yanked the battery, and signed the title over. By now it has been recycled. One of you might be driving a car made with the steel from my first car....
Ahhhh, that picture 'splains everything and should have been posted with the original article. It all makes sense now. Good post!
Ah, the 225 cid Slant Six. Greatest engine ever built. I worked with a guy, fifteen years ago just out of college, who had what was left of a '67 Dart with a Slant Six. The car was literally rusting apart around him, one door didn't work, the headliner was falling out...it had the original, never-overhauled, Slant Six in it after 22 years and 260,000 miles, and it still purred like a kitten (with a rusted muffler) every time he started it. They don't build 'em like that anymore.
I'm happy with my '96 Ram half-ton pickup and its 318 Magnum though, 132,000 miles and still rattling along. Looks like hell, drives great. And much easier to mess with in most areas than my wife's 2000 Focus. For one thing, there's nothing quite like the engine compartment on a Ram to make a small-block V8 look incredibly tiny...
}:-)4
I have the book around here somewhere, and I once owned two Beetles and a Ghia. The book did come in handy. "How to Keep Your Volkswagen Alive", "a manual for the compleat idiot" (that's the way complete was spelled on the cover, it's no typo), by John Muir.
Memories.....
Have you tried isolating the short -- figure out what is on that circuit, disconnect all and add back one at a time until the fuse blows. Might need a repair manual.
The alternative: remove one circuit at a time until the fuse doesn't blow anymore. Requires more fuses.
Once you have figured out which circuit is causing the short then could be the device (light, radio, etc.) on that circuit or the wiring to the device. A volt meter/ohm meter would be handy at this point -- check resistance between wiring to ground. etc.
Tougher if it is shorting intermittently.
Not this part though ...
23) Dump first quart of fresh oil into engine.
24) Remember drain plug from step 11.
That's not funny.
Not funny at all.
Not only can you change you own oil...you should change your own own oil...
Your VW will think it's romantic and sweet of you, and it'll be nice to you for months afterwards!...hehe
As fer your electrical nightmare in the Aerostar, I'd follow the posted suggestions. I'm not much of an electrician.
Try the light socket first. If that's not it take a spare afternoon (hehe), and try tracking down the wires that live on that fuse that keeps blowing.
Females: Use a manual or electrical schematics.
Males: Putter around for hours on end without looking at the directions.
One wire is probably bare somewhere. Nudity is bad in the whitehouse and electrical wires. If a wire gets exposed and touches metal, you'll have vicious electrical gremlins.
Also, keep looking for your VW!
For motivation for you, I went to get the tags renewed on mine today at lunch.
After an hour and a half of stadging in a surly line, I got new stickers for my buddies.
VW Bus and VW Bug tags: about $40 dollars each...
Laughing at the blonde college gal who cried as she credit carded $1300.00 dollars...Priceless
DAMHIKT!
What happened to baling wire and duck tape???? I thought everything could be fixed with those 2 things :)
Thanks for the hint. What happens if your teeth stick to the gum....... just plug the holes with everything in your mouth!?!
Similar thing happened to me when I was a kid. Decided to change the oil in my car for the first time.
Removed all of the oil, replaced the filter, and put four more quarts into the engine.
Got about a mile down the street when my automatic transmission started slipping. Had to pull over and I limped back to my grandparents.
I had drained the automatic transmission fluid instead of the oil -- had twice the oil in the engine and no transmission fluid.
My grandfather had a pretty good laugh.
My first car, a sixties model chrysler, is in a barn someplace in iowa. It's got a 440-4barrel, a dana 60 and a torquflight727. Those used to be farely desireable for drag racing...probably not so much nowdays though.
I used to envy a buddy of mine that had an old 4x2 Ram shortbox with a slant six motor, 4 on the floor and shiny new red paint. I don't remember what size the motor was though.
LOL. My wife did that to me once with her Honda. After I got her off the highway into a parking lot, I went through the steps... air, water, ...fuel?? After I got back with the 5 gal gas can from home and it started she said, and I quote... "It couldn't have been out of gas, the light didn't come on."
Thats it! Thats the name.
My memories are fading as I get older.
I might still have it, too. In a box deep in the "archive" in our basement.
I remember balancing the rods with string a stick and a grinding wheel as instructed in the book.
The engine was light enough to remove from the car by yourself. Acutally, you lifted the back end of the car up and over the motor (while the motor was sitting on the ground). Getting the engine back on the spline was a little tricky. I remember it took me some time since the spline was angled.
A really fun car and engine to work on.
motorhead ping.
Well, that's a given!
Heck, even young whipper snappers like you know THAT!
I don't think I'd put my teeth in the radiator.
If you've ever got a spoon caught in the garbage disposer you know the sound they'd make when they went through the water pump.
LOL! Thanks.
I've never felt smarter than I do right now.
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