Posted on 10/19/2004 11:28:28 PM PDT by ProtectOurFreedom
...Kerry proves incapable of reading simple declarative sentences. He inserts dependent clauses and prepositional phrases until every sentence is a watery mess. Kerry couldn't read a Dick and Jane book to schoolchildren without transforming its sentences into complex run-ons worthy of David Foster Wallace. Kerry's speechwriters routinely insert the line, "We can bring back that mighty dream," near the conclusion of his speeches, presumably as an echo of Ted Kennedy's Shrum-penned "the dream will never die" speech from the 1980 Democratic convention. Kerry saps the line of its power. Here's his version from Monday's speech in Tampa: "We can bring back the mighty dream of this country, that's what's at stake in these next two weeks."
Kerry flubs his punch lines, sprinkles in irrelevant anecdotes, and talks himself into holes that he has trouble improvising his way out of. He steps on his applause lines by uttering them prematurely, and then when they roll up on his TelePrompTer later, he's forced to pirouette and throat-clear until he figures out how not to repeat himself. He piles adjective upon adjective until it's like listening to a speech delivered by Roget.
Kerry's health-care speech Monday in Tampa was a classic of the form. The written text contained a little more than 2,500 words. By the time he was finished, Kerry had spoken nearly 5,300 words—not including his introductory remarks and thank-yous to local politicians—more than doubling the verbiage. Pity his speechwriters when you read the highlights below. It's not their fault.
(Excerpt) Read more at slate.msn.com ...
> It turns out even Slate agrees!
The conspiratorial could almost surmise that "the word"
has gone out from Chappagua on JfK 2.0
John F. Kennedy could really move a generation. John F*ckin' ain't no Kennedy!
And Mr. Suellentrop can't write a paragraph without making two-bit references to obscure wingnut writers.
Kerry acts like ordering at a restaurant is like delivering the Lincoln Gettysburg Address.
If he had to pay a dollar--from his salary, not his wife's bank account--for every extra word, he'd read each script flawlessly. We in MA know Kerry is CHEAP!
And his wife's no Jackie...
That's because sKerry thinks he's smarter than anyone else. He wants to be sure his 'eloquence' is on display.
> Kerry acts like ordering at a restaurant is like
> delivering the Lincoln Gettysburg Address.
And that the speech as written needs to be improvised
mid-sentence, as it lacks enough gravitas, or gravy,
or something.
The full article is a hoot, and astonishingly critical
of Kerry. Either "the word" went out, or the Pravda
Press reads the tea leaves and wants to put some distance
between themselves and the imminent debacle.
You have to read this one ... Kerry can't even give a speech correctly .. *L*
'Yes, I'll have French Fries with that. French fries are made out of potatoes, you know, and I plan to raise the minimum wage in order that those who break their backs picking those potatoes will earn a decent wage. A wage that will enable them to pay for the high price of gasoline -- gasoline that we are dependent on foreign countries for. And yes, I'll have ketsup on that burger. Burgers come from cows, you know. And I will work to insure that all cows have a place to come home to at night. There will be no cow left behind.'
Good article. But they miss the point. Its not that he adds words. Its that he is so stupid that when they hand him his speech he thinks it is an outline.
watch him. he does it three or four places in every speech. sort of like the fact that he only seems to own two ties; one pale blue, and one a peculiar shade between pink and red. it turns out that there are probably dozens of them, and they are custom made; they all have a "JK" design with american flags on them....
This is absolutely hilarious. Reading the article is funny but you guys are even funnier. I’m like half asleep here reading and you guys are making me laugh loud enough to wake up my baby. Thanks for the humor.
Not only Kerry is a gasbag but so is the writer to this story. What’s up with this guy?? Is he trying to prove his English 100 skills?? I had to look some shit up just to know what the hell he is talking about… or is it just me? And yes, they are in CYA mode because J F*kn K is going down in a ball of flames. W by 10 points when its all said and done.
I'd be surprised if JF'nK didn't take longer to order at a restaurant than Lincoln took to deliver the Gettysburg Address. (It was one of the shorter presidential speeches in history.)
It used to be Thurston Howell III, but he has changed his delivery since testifying in '71.
And we're recording the speech for posterity, right?
What an egotistical fop. Can't stop talking? Join that 12-step program: OnAndOnAndOn-Anon.
I thought that yesterday when I saw the John Edwards video of him combing his hair. It was originally posted on Slate.com, not what you'd call a bastion of right wing partisanship.
Plus there were a couple NYTimes articles highly critical of Kerry.
Actually, that's insulting Lincoln, who was very concise at Gettysburg. Kerry's more like Bill Clinton at the 1988 Democratic Convention.
I'm John F*ckin' Kerry - Je suis de Jean Francois Cheri. I am running for President Of The United States - Je cours pour le sécrétaire général de l'ONU. My home is Boston, Massachusetts - En France est mon coeur. I believe in defending America - Je exique ce que l'approbation française à l'avance. The Iraq War was the wrong war at the wrong place at the wrong time - La mère France est le pays droit au bon endroit au bon temps. Elle sait l'avancer des intérêts comme le fais je - dans la convenance et sans souci de principe ou d'honneur. I know how to make America stronger and respected again in the world - Et ayez le faisceau de Jacques Chirac avec fierté à quel simpleton je suis. There's one thing about me that doesn't need translation - I am the Frenchurian Candidate For The Ages. Je suis le candidat de Frenchurian pour les âges. Vote for me on Nov 2nd so the world will love America. (Tandis que f*cks de la France nous excédent idiot.)
You have this out-rrrageous French accent, you silly FReeper!
I have to rest now, as my Babel Fish is stuned by that post.
;o)
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