Put The Speakers In A Cage (Ann Coulter's Spiked Article)

anncoulter.com ^ | July 26. 2004 | Ann Coulter

[bimboeruption]

USA Today Put The Speakers In A Cage July 26, 2004

Here at the Spawn of Satan convention in Boston, conservatives are deploying a series of covert signals to identify one another, much like gay men do. My allies are the ones wearing crosses or American flags. The people sporting shirts emblazened with the "F-word" are my opponents. Also, as always, the pretty girls and cops are on my side, most of them barely able to conceal their eye-rolling.

Democrats are constantly suing and slandering police as violent, fascist racists -- with the exception of Boston's police, who'll be lauded as national heroes right up until the Democrats pack up and leave town on Friday, whereupon they'll revert to their natural state of being fascist, racist pigs.

A speaker at the Democratic National Convention this year, Al Sharpton, accused white police officers of raping and defacing Tawana Brawley in 1987, lunatic charges that eventually led to a defamation lawsuit against Sharpton and even more eventually, to Sharpton paying a jury award to the defamed plaintiff Steve Pagones. So its a real mystery why cops wouldn't like Democrats.

Books Strongly Recommended! Hillary's Secret War, Richard Poe So Many Enemies, So Little Time, Elinor Burkett Roots of Freedom, John W. Danford

By Ann Coulter Treason: Hardcover | Audio Slander: Paperback | Hardcover | Audio | Large Print High Crimes: Paperback

Sponsors I'm Betting on Iraq As life improves, so might their money. Single Conservatives Find a single conservative free! Annoy a Liberal! Peace Through Superior Firepower shirts

Start Advertising Now .

E-Mail List

As for the pretty girls, I can only guess that its because liberal boys never try to make a move on you without the UN Security Council's approval. Plus, its no fun riding around in those dinky little hybrid cars. My pretty-girl allies stick out like a sore thumb amongst the corn-fed, no make-up, natural fiber, no-bra needing, sandal-wearing, hirsute, somewhat fragrant hippie chick pie wagons they call "women" at the Democratic National Convention.

Apparently, the nuts at the Democratic National Convention are going to be put in cages outside the convention hall. Sadly, they won't be fighting to the death as is done in W.W.F. caged matches. They're calling this the "protestor's area," although I suppose a better name would be the "truth-free zone".

I thought this was a great idea until I realized the nut category did not include Sharpton, Al Gore, Bill Clinton, and Teddy Kennedy -- all featured speakers at the convention. I'd say the actual policy is only untelegenic nuts get the cages, but little Dennis Kucinich is speaking at the Convention, too. So it must be cages for nuts who have not run for president as serious candidates for the Democratic Party.

Looking at the line-up of speakers at the Convention, I have developed the 7-11 challenge: I will quit making fun of, for example, Dennis Kucinich, if he can prove he can run a 7-11 properly for 8 hours. We'll even let him have an hour or so of preparation before we open up. Within 8 hours, the money will be gone, the store will be empty, and he'll be explaining how three 11-year olds came in and asked for the money and he gave it to them.

For 20 years, the Democrats wouldn't let Jimmy Carter within 100 miles of a Convention podium. The fact that Carter is now their most respectable speaker tells you where that party is today. Maybe they just want to remind Americans who got us into this Middle East mess in the first place. W've got millions of fanatical Muslims trying to slaughter Americans while shouting Allah Akbar! Yeah, let's turn the nation over to these guys.

With any luck, Gore will uncork his speech comparing Republicans to Nazis. Just a few weeks ago, Gore gave a speech accusing the Bush administration of deploying digital Brown Shirts to intimidate journalists and pressure the media into writing good things about Bush -- in case you were wondering where all those glowing articles about Bush were coming from.

The last former government official to slake his thirst so deeply with the kool-aid and become a far-left peacenik was Ramsey Clarke and it took him a few years to really blossom. Clinton must have done some number on Gore. Then again, with his yen for earth tones in a man's wardrobe, maybe Gore's references to "Brown Shirts" was intended as a compliment.

Only one major newspaper -- the Boston Herald -- reported Gore's Brown Shirt comment, though a Bush campaign spokesman's statement quoting the "Brown Shirt" line made it into the very last sentence of a Los Angeles Times article. The New York Times responded with an article criticizing both Republicans and Democrats for using Nazi imagery. Democrats call Republicans Nazis, the Republicans quote the Democrats calling Republicans Nazis and both are using Nazi imagery. (It's a cycle of violence!)

The nuts in the cages are virtual Bertrand Russells compared to the official speakers at the Democratic Convention. On the basis of their placards, I gather the caged-nut position is that they love the troops so much, they don't want them to get hurt defending America from terrorist attack. Support the troops, the signs say, bring them home.

That's my new position on all government workers, except the 5% who aren't useless, which is to say cops, prosecutors, firemen and U.S. servicemen. I love bureaucrats at the National Endowment of the Arts funding crucifixes submerged in urine so much -- I think they should go home. I love public school teachers punishing any mention of God and banning Christmas songs so much -- I think they should go home.

Walking back from the convention site I chatted with a normal Bostonian for several blocks -- who must have identified me through our covert system of signals. He was mostly bemused by the Democrats' primetime speakers and told me he used to be an independent, but for the last 20 years found himself voting mostly Republican. Then he corrected himself and said he votes for the American.

I'd say I love all these Democrats in Boston so much I want them to go home, but I don't. I want Americans to get a good long look at the French Party and keep the 7-11 challenge in mind.

[jscd3]

Reading what this highly trained professional said was funnier than watching a clown walk into a lamppost.

Agrred. The editor in question is either a comic genius or Janet Reno's chief investigator...

[jscd3]

'Democrat women are all unwashed, dirty hippies' is hardly even an original piece of invective.

You're right. I'm sure she meant 'Democrat women are all foulmouthed unwashed, dirty billionaire hippies'

Touche...You might have also pointed out to Calvin that noting that the sky is blue is not an original observation either, but what it lacks in originality it makes up for in historical support and accuracy...

[Libertarianize the GOP]

Do you think Moore is actually going to write that column himself? I'm not sure the slob can read, let alone write.

Moore has too big of an ego to let anyone else write the column for him.

[MissAmericanPie]

In this article her disgust and hatred for these putz Demonrats got the best of her usual humor. Comes from having to be that near those disgusting cockroaches that rightly should be broadcasting as citizens from terrorist Palestine. The close proximity naturally would cause any normal person to seethe with rage.

[bradactor]

To see USA Today didn't know Ann Coulter is ludicrous. I am sure they have never seriously read her articles, books, comments, I guess. Ann summed it up when she said they want a conservative like themselves. Just like the DNC this week is trying to turn Edwards and Kerry into moderate conservatives or whatever.
Brad

[bray]

Another tape measure Home Run! So many lines in so little space. Ann Rox!

Pray for W and Our Troops

[Brian Allen]

<< It hurts her credibility when she argues that Democrats are beyond the pale when they refer to Republicans as 'Nazis', after having just begun her article by calling Democrats 'spawn of satan'.

You are missing her point.

She is talking about how liberals in the media resort to destroying the truth and muddling the mind.

To talk about someone accusing someone of being a Nazi is not the same thing as accusing someone of being a Nazi. >>

Unless, of course, you're a moral relative or some other manifestation and/or mutation of evil.

Which was Ms Coulter's piece's whole point.

[Area Freeper]

This is the best column Ann Coulter has ever written.

[AFPhys]

I just LOVED this article.

Thanks again, Ann! You really know how to use your Claymore [sword]!

Even though it was the title, I still LOLed at the

"...protestor's area," although I suppose a better name would be the "truth-free zone".

"I thought this was a great idea until I realized the nut category did not include Sharpton, Al Gore, Bill Clinton,
and Teddy Kennedy -- "

Thanks again!

[PISANO]

It hurts her credibility when she argues that Democrats are beyond the pale when they refer to Republicans as 'Nazis', after having just begun her article by calling Democrats 'spawn of satan'

The NAZI comparison is REAL, the "Spawn of Satan" is metaphysical, and is meant to get a laugh. I see no comparison in the two. Besides, she is the ONLY bomb-thrower we have on our side, she is virtually BANNED from all MSM outlets, I like her metaphoric BOMBS, and will NOT aid the enemy, in their quest to silence her!

[Calvin Coolidge]

I'd just prefer that the bombs she was throwing had some substance. She is just hurling ad-hominem attacks, and you can almost see the spittle flying out of her mouth while she spits them out. The convention hall will be filled with well-groomed, clean-shaven people with ideas that are wrong for America. I think that her type of stereotyping takes the focus off of those ideas and what is wrong with them.

[AndyTheBear]

It hurts her credibility when she argues that Democrats are beyond the pale when they refer to Republicans as 'Nazis'

Not at all. It helps her credibility not to show fear, and to reject the idea that fairness and truth need be equally balanced between the current right and left.

There are many on the left that would not mind being called the span of Satan, especially if they think they can upset Christians by embracing the title. They think its funny. So in a sense it is true.

On the other hand, the plentiful and unending accusations of comparing conservatives with Nazis is no joking matter to anyone. There is a tiny minority of self proclaimed Nazis, and they are vehemently scorned by main stream conservatives and liberals alike.

As for groups considered marginally acceptable among conservatives, there are none resembling the evil nature of the Nazis.

Ironically, for groups considered marginally acceptable among liberals, there are several that are at least comparable in several nasty ways with the Nazis. Take for example the dogmatic kookiness of the Nation of Islam. Take for example the Palestinian groups which aim to systematically exterminate Jews while portraying themselves as the victim.

No, with those of us who are honest. Ann gains credibility with her honesty. Modern day Liberals are like someone trying to sell a toothpick for a billion dollars. Meeting them half way has become ridiculous.