Posted on 07/12/2004 7:59:57 PM PDT by LaDivaLoca
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He he he.
And the Democraps complain about unemployment...
Mornin' How is everything today? Are your voices calm?
NEVER!
I didn't think so, but then you just never know. What are they saying today?
Yeah, the bubble that she lives in...
mine
Proof that pigs do fly!
Good Morning troops!! Good Morning everyone! Here is today's humor attempt!
"Do you believe in life after death?" the boss asked one of his employees.
"Yes, Sir." the new recruit replied.
"Well, then, that makes everything just fine," the boss went on. "After you left early yesterday to go to your grandmother's funeral, she stopped in to see you."
LoL!!!!!!!
Not to mention the fact tha TaRaaaayZa prbably can't even get enough of a security clearance to even LIVE in the White House due to the groups she suppots.
You know, I hadn't even thought about that. You may be right, but then, strings would be pulled.
LOL!!!
Hey - was I right about the cure for jellyfish stings??
Morning Giggles:
Well, it seems these two rednecks, Bubba and Cooter,
decided they should go to college so they could get ahead.
Bubba went in first, and the professor advises him
to take Math, History, and Logic.
"What's Logic?" Bubba asked.
"Well, let me give you an example," said the
professor.
"Do you own a weed-eater?"
"Sure do," the redneck responded.
"Okay. Then I assume, using logic, that you have a yard," the professor went on.
"That's real good," said the redneck, in awe.
"Logic also tells me that since you have a yard, you
also have a house. Is that right?"
"GAWL-LEE!" the redneck shouted.
"And since you own a house and a house is tough to
take care of by yourself, logic dictates that you have a wife. Right?"
"Betty Mae! This is incredible!" Bubba is catching
on now.
"Finally, since you have a wife, logically I can
assume you are heterosexual rather th! an homosexual. Is that right?"
"You are absolutely right! Why that's the most
fascinatin' thang I ever heerd of. I can't wait to take this here logic class!"
Bubba, proud of the new world opening up to him,
walks back into the hallway where Cooter is still waiting. "So what classes are ya takin"? Cooter asks.
"Math, History, and Logic," replied Bubba.
"What in tarnation is logic?" asks Cooter.
"Let me give you an example," Bubba says. "Do you
own a weed-eater?"
"No." says Cooter.
"You're Queer, aintcha!?"
On This Day In History
Birthdates which occurred on July 13:
1396 Philip the Good Duke of Burgundy
1527 John Dee London, alchemist/astrologer/mathematician
1608 Ferdinand III, King of Hungary/Bohemia/German Emperor (1637-57)
1793 John Clare Northamptonshire peasant poet (Shepard's Calendar)
1815 James Alexander Seddon, Secy War (Confederacy), died in 1880
1821 Nathan Bedford Forrest Tennessee, brilliant cavalry leader, Lt Gen
1863 Emma Mary Wooley educator (Mary Anna Wells)
1901 Mickey "Toy Bulldog" Walker welterweight boxing champ (1922-26)
1913 Dave Garroway Schnectady NY, TV host (Today Show)
1928 Bob Crane Waterbury Ct, actor (Hogan's Heroes)
1934 Alexei S Yeliseyev cosmonaut (Soyuz 5, 8, 10)
1935 Jack Kemp (Rep-R-NY)/QB Buffalo Bills/US Secretary of Housing (1989- )
1940 Patrick Stewart actor (Capt Picard-Star Trek Next Generation)
1940 Paul Prudhomme cajun chef
1942 Harrison Ford actor (Star Wars, Indiana Jones, Blade Runner)
1942 Roger McGuinn rocker (Byrds-Turn Turn Turn, Mr Tambourine Man)
1946 Richard "Cheech" Marin comedian (Cheech & Chong-Up in Smoke)
1950 George D "Pinky" Nelson Iowa, PhD/astro (STS 41C, STS 61-C, STS-26)
1954 Louise Mandrell Corpus Christi Tx, country singer (Mandrell Sisters)
1975 Danielle Boatwright, Kansas, Miss USA (Kansas-2nd-1996)
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