Bill Clinton's Very Long Life (claims bio is 4,000 pages longhand, will have $35+ price tag)

NY Post ^ | May 3, 2004 | Cindy Adams

[dead]

BILL Clinton's bio. Out next month, it's still - if you can believe it - in the tinkering stage. At last week's in- house exclusive chat - a surprise visit - with 250 Random House executives and sales force, he said: "I'm just about finished." These hardcore booksellers have seen it all. Still, he electrified them. It was a 15-minute off-the-cuff talk. Not a note in front of him.

[alisasny]

I shudder to imagine his longhand rantings....YIKES.

Sadly a bunch of editors will fix it up and make a good product that the sheep will buy.

LOL

[ken5050]

The book will be 500 pages, 150,000 words, of which the word "I" will be used 45,000 times..

[Semper Paratus]

Kerry is going to find out that 'rat donations to him will be dried out from all the books his erstwhile donators are having to buy this year.

[Ron in Acreage]

If you remove all the lies, it makes a nice pocket sized pamphlet and may cost about .50 cents.

[.38sw]

Unlike his roommate, he's not working for a living

His roommate? Who's his roommate? Surely she's not referring to Shrillery.

[Humidston]

Wow. The ultimate narcissistic tome from a consummate liar.

"There's a sucker born every minute." ....P.T. Barnum.

[Choose Ye This Day]

John Adams was actually a decent, moral man and president. He was worth it.

[aShepard]

??Longhand??

Longhand??

Doesn't this dork know how to use a word proceswsor??

Or, did somebody take off the M-O-N-I-C-A keys??

[dead]

I don't believe he ever put a pen to paper. He spoke into a tape recorder, and his ghostwriter has to package all the ramblings into a coherent narrative.

Fortunately, the ghost writer had his theme handed to him personally by Bill Clinton - "Bill Clinton was a great, great president. Maybe the best ever. Any failings of his administration was due to the continuing hectoring and obstruction he had to endure from the VRWC. And he loves that woman he's married to. Lots, though nobody's seen them together in about two years. Oh, and he loves that daughter girl. The one with the lips."

[Diogenesis]

[dighton]

The work of Dr. Nares has filled us with astonishment similar to that which Captain Lemuel Gulliver felt when first he landed in Brobdingnag, and saw corn as high as the oaks in the New Forest, thimbles as large as buckets, and wrens of the bulk of turkeys. The whole book, and every component part of it, is on a gigantic scale. The title is as long as an ordinary preface: the prefatory matter would furnish out an ordinary book; and the book contains as much reading as an ordinary library. We cannot sum up the merits of the stupendous mass of paper which lies before us better than by saying that it consists of about two thousand closely printed quarto pages, that it occupies fifteen hundred inches cubic measure, and that it weighs sixty pounds avoirdupois. Such a book might, before the deluge, have been considered as light reading by Hilpa and Shallum. But unhappily the life of man is now three-score years and ten; and we cannot but think it somewhat unfair in Dr. Nares to demand from us so large a portion of so short an existence.

Compared with the labour of reading through these volumes, all other labour, the labour of thieves on the treadmill, of children in factories, of negroes in sugar plantations, is an agreeable recreation.

-- Macaulay, Burleigh and His Times, 1832.

[anniegetyourgun]

I wonder too. They haven't been living as husband and wife for years.

[freedomson]

Of course it's gonna be long.

In the first chapter we find our Bubba in the Garden of Eden.

[dead]

LOL! Very appropriate.

[Diogenesis]

Clinton and Belinda - ? a hotter, younger, more attractive, and smarter, "Hillary" with better hair.

[TXBSAFH]

Coming soon to an adult book store near you.

[.38sw]

Hmmmm. Could be.

Bill looks like he could use a bra.

[isthisnickcool]

If you will check you will find Barnum never said that...

BTW, I have seen the photo for the cover of Bill Clinton's new book. It's posted here.

[.38sw]

I certainly seemed like an odd thing to say, didn't it?