Morford: Is Your Porn Safe?

San Francisco Chronicle ^ | Wednesday, April 28, 2004 | Mark Morford, gay porn addict

[presidio9]

Can you hear the outcry? Can you feel the snippy puritanical heat?

Can you feel John Ashcroft's hot, predatory breath bearing down on your life and your box of vibrators and your adult DVD collection and snatching away your copy of "Weapons of A-- Destruction #2" and smacking you across the face with a Bible, all before skipping off to the dungeon to feed the flying monkeys?

Because while 9/11 and the process of gleefully decimating your civil liberties via the USA Patriot Act may have delayed him a few years, Ashcroft & Co. is back on the anti-porn warpath, hell-bent on slashing and burning its way through the porn industry like a priest through an all-male boarding school -- oh wait, bad analogy -- like a hot knife through butter -- nope, not that, either -- like a Halliburton exec through Baghdad -- there, that's more like it -- as the U.S. Justice Department sets its sights on punishing the sex industry and eradicating porn and making the world safe for uptight danceless ultra-pious nondrinking white men once and for all.

[xm177e2]

Can you really describe that as "man-boy"? I mean, a 17-year-old is almost a man, and a shemale almost isn't.

[Just another Joe]

The only sentiment I will give him in the entire article is this one.

and the never-ending cry will continue to wail right through November: "Who -- pray, who -- will save the children?" (My God but children need a lot of saving these days, don't they? The poor dears. It's amazing they're not all depressed and rebellious and forced by their parents to become addicted to prescription meds. Oh wait).

[O.C. - Old Cracker]

Yes, defended with the same zeal that the sophisticated pot smoker uses to protect his precious cannabis. (just got off a Woody Harrelson/dopehead thread)

[O.C. - Old Cracker]

Dang! How would you like to be the cop at the front of that arrest?

[ArrogantBustard]

radiant unstoppable women

Morford misspelled "skanky sleazebags", and there weren't anywhere near 1 million of them

[Slings and Arrows]