Facts About Texas

eMail | 2-10-04 | unknown

[ChuckHam]

Yet you allow millions of illegal aliens to run loose all over the state?

If you're going to be a broken record then you can at least admit the problem is just as big if not bigger in California.

Pot.....kettle

[tet68]

I had a cool book about texas once, it was called "Texas Brags".

Had a great story about a farmer in the panhandle who was driving two mules with a load of corn to town and it was so hot the corn began to pop, the mules thought it was snow and froze to death.

Sometimes when a blue northerner comes through, the camp fires freeze, then the texans grind them up to make chili powder!

[Richard Kimball]

Oklahoma's a terrific place to be from.

[sandydipper]

Also Jim Pope - the Sec/Tres of the 504th MP BN Assoc. lives in Balinger. A really fine feller.

[tet68]

Armadillo.......possum on the half shell.

[bobbyd]

Ping

[ErnBatavia]

That's the reason there's that old country song, "Lookin' at Texas in my rearview mirror"

[hobson]

Have you heard of Earth, Texas? Funny true story from a friend of my Dad. The man from Earth was driving through Arizona and was stopped for speeding. The officer asked him where he was from and he replied, Earth. The officer was not amused.

[MPJackal]

Another interesting fact that more people fought at the Alamo from the states of OH, KY, TN, AL, and many other states, than people from the TX Teritory (If I remember right, that number was 3). So TX you are welcome. Your ability to join the US was paid for with the blood of NON Texans. Everything is big in TX including their egos. Oh, my wife is from TX so you can understand my point of view.

[HuntsvilleTxVeteran]

It is so flat in Texas, an echo takes 8 hours to return.
This is nice as before you go to sleep, you just yell
"wake up".

[Flyer]

Texas stuff *PING!*

As always, a FReep mail will get you on or off this Houston topics ping list.

[bobbyd]

.

[philetus]

German Air Force Air Defense School
El Paso / Fort Bliss, Texas, USA

http://www.goerigk-jever.de/rakslw-a.htm

[Ditter]

I have never eaten an armadillo. They are carriers of leprosy I believe.

[philetus]

Armadillo Stew

1 armadillo; shelled, cleaned and cut into chunks
1 pound dried pinto beans, cleaned and soaked
1 large onion, chopped
garlic, chili powder, cumin, cilentro salt and pepper to taste

Saute meat in oil. Add beans, onion and seasonings to meat. Cover with water. Cook until beans are done. May need to add more water.

Yield: 8 servings.

[Deguello]

The San Jacinto Monument is taller than the Washington Monument and this fact really irritates the staff at the Washington Post.

[philetus]

"Happiness is Lubbock, Texas in my rearview mirror"

[HuntsvilleTxVeteran]

Hell In Texas


THE DEVIL, we're told, in hell was chained,
And a thousand years he there remained,
And he never complained, nor did he groan,
But determined to start a hell of his own
Where he could torment the souls of men
Without being chained to a prison pen.

So he asked the Lord if He had on hand
Anything left when He made the land.
Tle Lord said, 'Yes, I had plenty on hand,
But I left it down on the Rio Grand
The fact is, old boy, the stuff is so poor,
I don't think you could use it in hell any more."

But the devil went down to look at the truck,
And said if it came as a gift, he was stuck;
For after examining it careful and well
He concluded the place was too dry for hell.
So in order to get it off His hands
God promised the devil to water the lands.

For he had some water, or rather some dregs,
A regular cathartic that smelt like bad eggs.
Hence the deal was closed and the deed was given,
And the Lord went back to His place in Heaven.
And the devil said, 'I have all that is needed
To make a good hell," and thus he succeeded.

He began to put thorns on all the trees,
And he mixed the sand with millions of fleas,
He scattered tarantulas along all the roads,
Put thorns on the cacti and homs on the toads;
He lengthened the homs of the Texas steers
And put an addition on jack rabbits' ears.

He put little devils in the broncho steed
And poisoned the feet of the centipede.
The rattlesnake bites you, the scorpion stings,
The mosquito delights you by buzzing his wings.
The sand burrs prevail, so do the ants,
And those that sit down need half soles on their pants.

The devil then said that throughout the land
He'd manage to keep up the devil's own brand,
And all would be mavericks unless they bore
Tle marks of scratches and bites by the score.
The heat in the summer is a hundred and ten,
Too hot for the devil and too hot for men.

Tle wild boar roams through the black chaparral,
It's a hell of a place be has for a hell;
Tle red pepper grows by the bank of the brook,
The Mexicans use it in all that they cook.
Just dine with a Greaser and then you will shout,
"I've a hell on the inside as well as without."

Unknown Author

[D Rider]

Awesome, "I would like 8 new senators and a coke to go please."

[helen crump]

Who is Phil Sheridan?