Gender Blender: Adolescent Girls and 'Heteroflexibility'

BreakPoint ^ | Feb. 9, 2004 | Charles Colson

[DemWatch]

Back rubs, slumber parties, holding hands, and playing with each others’ hair: This is all typical teenage girl behavior. While boys tend to rough-house, girls tend to be more affectionate. It’s always been innocent.

Until now, that is, writes Washington Post writer Laura Sessions Stepp. Nowadays, “sexual preference is a shifting concept” among adolescent girls, and in our sex-charged culture affectionate behavior between girls has gone well beyond child’s play.

It’s hard to tell whether these girls are acting on attraction or are simply vying for attention. For example, in one Washington, D.C., private school, a group of girls charged boys $10 to watch girls make out. “In the protean world of young female sexuality, where all forms of expression are modeled,” Stepp writes, “nothing is certain.” As one Brown University female said, “I like women only right now, but who knows where I’ll be in 25 years?”

Researchers say this malleability of female sexuality is to be expected. Lisa Diamond of the University of Utah conducted a longitudinal study of women ages 16 to 23 who were attracted to other women and found that over eight years, two-thirds of them changed labels “from unlabeled to bisexual, lesbian to bisexual.” One professor concluded, “there are multiple pathways to homosexuality.”

On one level, this phenomenon among young women is about the growing acceptance of homosexuality and how that affects them. When the Edmund Burke School in Washington, D.C., held a “diversity day,” students gathered in a circle and were asked to step into the middle if they described themselves as homosexual. No students stepped forward. Then they were asked to step forward if they thought of themselves as bisexual, and of the sixty students present, fifteen stepped forward, including eleven girls.

In the world of adolescence, young people are pursuing acceptance. “Whoever likes me, I like them,” said one high-school girl. “Most of these girls aren’t gay,” said another. “They’re just doing it because their friends are doing it.”

“These girls say they don’t know what they are and don’t need to know,” writes Stepp. “Adolescence and young adulthood is a time for exploration . . . ” That statement gets closer to the heart of the matter: They don’t know, and in schools and in popular culture—Britney Spears kissing Madonna—they’re encouraged to try it all.

Today’s sexually charged culture treats the options of gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgendered as all equal, all accepted choices. So when a girl hugs another girl, she may wonder if she’s lesbian or shy away from once-innocent behavior for fear of being thought lesbian. Add to that the possibility that girls may be reacting to bad experiences with boys, and we have complete confusion.

Adolescents are being bombarded by messages from media, peers, and schools. The most detrimental message is “anything goes—everything’s legitimate.” We need to encourage kids like never before that God designed them in His image, and He has a specific design for our relationships. They don’t have to try out everything, only to be left in the end with nothing.

[Gerasimov]

One professor concluded, “there are multiple pathways to homosexuality.”

Sooooo.... which is it? I thought gays were "born that way." How could there be "multiple pathways" to being queer if it truly is a gene? I didn't get "multiple pathways" to being a white guy ... or "multiple pathways" to having blond hair....

More evidence that the militant queer activists are doing everything they can to "recruit" normal kids, in spite of their claims to the contrary.

[Dr. Frank fan]

[In many cases it's because they think it will make guys like them better.] their thoughts are very well founded.

It's true enough to say that such behavior will titillate guys.

That's not the same thing as guys starting to like them better. (Let alone take them seriously enough to form an actual relationship with them, marry them, etc.)

But many girls do think it is the same thing (a common confusion among adolescents) which helps explain the trend IMHO.

Best,

[stylin_geek]

Watching is one thing, however, active participation...

Another term I've seen is "Lipstick Lesbian" Heck, I've known a number of women (not in the Biblical sense) who would, on occasion, sleep with other women, but did not consider themselves lesbian.

[Gerasimov]

Hoping to find dimwitted hormone ravished boys to sell the homosexuality myth to...

I think it'll be a harder sell in most cases to turn the guys into flamers than it is to turn the girls into ball bashers. As the article stated, girls are already more naturally affectionate with each other to a certain (heterosexual) degree ... boys have a serious social stigma to overcome first. The boys they will be praying on are the disturbed, lonely, friendless ones who are already confused social outcasts and therefore have less to loose by being known in school as a "the gay kid."

[Gerasimov]

That's not the same thing as guys starting to like them better

Exactly ... more the stuff of a "Girls Gone Wild" video or a drunken frat party than a "Let's take this one home to ma." sort of thing.

[EdReform]

One professor concluded, “there are multiple pathways to homosexuality.” On one level, this phenomenon among young women is about the growing acceptance of homosexuality and how that affects them...

Psychiatrist "Reassures" Parents About Lesbian Experimentation

"...The article describes a parent-faculty meeting at The Spence School, a private enclave overlooking Central Park, where several eighth-grade girls had declared themselves "bisexual." The school called in a Harvard-educated psychiatrist, Dr. Justin Richardson--himself a gay man--to reassure the parents that lesbian experimentation is common, and that it was too soon to know if they would be lesbians or heterosexuals.

At the all-girl Brearly School two weeks earlier, Dr. Richardson told a parent group to advise their daughters as young as nine years old that they, too, may have sex with other girls in the future. "It is a good idea," he said, "to mention that people have sex with members of the same sex sometimes, and that when they grow up they may have friends that do that--and that it may be something that they themselves do."

"A small but growing number of students," the Times article reported, "have come out at these schools, or at least say that bisexuality is stylish." Parents are concerned, and Dr. Richardson--"pedigreed, carefully-spoken, determinedly nonthreatening--has become the schools' gay issues consultant of choice" because he is "sane and clear," according to the Spence headmaster..."

[Ann Archy]

I think I'm going to be sick.

[nevergiveup]

As one Brown University female said, “I like women only right now, but who knows where I’ll be in 25 years?”

Nothing new here. As I well remember, the only ones who appreciated a "Pembroker" were other Pembrokers.

(Though there was one exception. But since this is a family oriented site I won't even start with the ice cream cone story.)

[4CJ]

Look for the remake of Deliverance coming to a theater near you.

[valkyrieanne]

Gay men and women are different. IMO, homosexuality in men is largely genetic (made worse by social factors like poor upbringing.)

Women are lesbians mostly because of circumstances. When they're young, it's a way to attract guys (because it's a common male fantasy.) As someone said above, they're "lesbians until graduation."

When the females are 40-plus, it's a way to have sex and companionship if they're widowed, divorced, or just never married.

[banjo joe]

“Most of these girls aren’t gay,” said another. “They’re just doing it because their friends are doing it.”

Okay, I'm a 49 y/o male, and times have changed. But I don't remember any of the buds going gay because our friends were doing it.

Sheesh... I really am at a loss here.

[Little Pig]

"there are multiple pathways to homosexuality"



Isn't there something in Matthew about "for the gate is wide and the way is broad that leads to destruction, and there are many who enter through it."

I keep getting the image of a varzea or a floodplain river with many channels, yet they all lead to the same place.

[68skylark]

Gay men and women are different.

Well I'm not a gay man or a gay woman, so maybe I shouldn't comment. But I think your observation is exactly right.

There are real differences between male and female sexuality. Gay men often argue that their homosexuality is genetic (am I basically believe them). Gay women often report it's their choice (which I also understand). There are plenty of other differences as well.

[Moleman]

a group of girls charged boys $10 to watch girls make out. “
Ten bucks, not bad, a lot cheaper than the two "ladies" we recently hired for my friends bachelor party :-)

[mikegi]

Yeah, they're called "sluts" and in the past they simply did every boy in town. Now that homos are all the rage they're doing other girls, too (and probably numerous inanimate objects).

[homeland_maturity]

I don't see what the big deal is. My girlfriend is quite comfortable and unashamed about sexual relationships she's had with other women. She was interested, they were interested; they had a good time. Many of my female friends have had "homo" relationships thoughout their lives: high school, college, and after. None of them are messed up or unhappy because they had those experiences.

I was never interested in boys, and have politely declined same-sex advances, and I've had plenty of my own advances declined by women who weren't interested in me.

Drudge Report has an article about a 23-year-old woman who posed as a 16-year-old boy in order to have a relationship with a 12-year-old girl. That's deceptive, manipulative, and predatory, and not the kind of thing I'm talking about. But I don't see anything wrong with people with a mutual respect for each other experimenting, having fun, and enjoying each other in a sexual way *as long as they are responsible* e.g. contraception, communication about the relationship, etc.

[longtermmemmory]

now the media is declairng/admitting homsexual behavior is a choice.

well it is sort of progress.

[fr_freak]

I don't see what the big deal is. My girlfriend is quite comfortable and unashamed about sexual relationships she's had with other women....But I don't see anything wrong with people with a mutual respect for each other experimenting, having fun, and enjoying each other in a sexual way *as long as they are responsible* e.g. contraception, communication about the relationship, etc.

Well, that's the heart of the "culture wars", isn't it? Either you believe that certain behaviors are immoral, and therefore inherently destructive to one's mental health and well-being, or you don't. Obviously you are on the side of "anything goes". Let me present my take on the ramifications of this trend:

The first aspect to consider is societal ramifications. The family is the bedrock of society. It is there that the child learns (or fails to learn) the values that he will then carry over to his role in society at large. How the child sees men, woman, peers, and his own place in society will all be shaped in these formative years. The child's own reasoning does come in to play to some degree, but I believe that though we may come to disagree with values we were taught (or that we absorbed) as children, we can never really be free of them; we can only compensate for them. The resulting conflict can be extremely stressful. The promotion of sex as simply a recreational act damages the importance of its role in marriage and family. This includes irresponsible heterosexual behavior as well. Sexual intimacy is a large part of the bond between a husband and wife, and is greatly diminished if each has become accustomed to sex as a casual activity. Homosexuality goes even farther in that it destroys the very foundation of marriage - that it is a union of a man and a woman.

The second aspect to consider is the individual's own mental and physical health. Even for those who claim to be purely homosexual, it appears to be very unhealthy to engage in that behavior. The health risks for men are indisputable - vastly increased risks of diseases such as AIDS, Hepatitis, and Syphilis, among others. The most alarming aspect of male homosexual behavior is its compulsive nature even in the face of these destructive diseases, demonstrating the participants' complete lack of respect for self and others. With women, these effects are not as pronounced but are similar from what I understand. There simply is no reason why these behaviors should be encouraged. Whether one is ashamed of the behavior or not is immaterial; there are plenty of unashamed rapists, thieves and murderers.

What the real issue in this instance is why behavior that was relatively unheard of 50 years ago is becoming so prevalent today. It is unreasonable to believe that it is because more girls are born lesbian now than 50 years ago. What we must realize is that the reason more girls (and probably boys) engage in this behavior is because it is being actively promoted by the greatest propaganda machine that has ever existed - the modern entertainment media. Lesbianism is being promoted to girls as being sexy and hip a la Brittany and Madonna. Girls looking to be desirable and appreciated, as so many are, may see this as the way. Given that such behavior, in reality, actually degrades an individual's chance at any real happiness, the promotion of it is inherently destructive and immoral.

[anniegetyourgun]

It is progress toward truth. The truth is that sex has always been a decision for human beings - male or female. Everyday decisions are made about when, where, with who, how often, if, with what, etc.

[AreaMan]

a group of girls charged boys $10 to watch girls make out

There is a name for them on the tip of my tongue, but it escapes me right now

This reminds me of an old joke:
Here it is condensed:

A woman is walking down the street when she is stopped by a rather short and homely man. The man, excusing himself ahead of time, asks her:

Man: "Excuse me but I wondered if you would sleep with me for a Million Dollars. Nobody needs to know about it, just you and me."

The woman considers this after getting over her initial shock and says:

Woman: Well, ok. But no kissing!

Man:Well then, how about $50 instead of a million dollars?

Woman:What!? What kind of a woman do you think I am!?

Man:Wait a sec, we both know what you are. It's only a question of price now.