Teacher tells kids Santa is 'make-believe' (1st graders)

AP ^ | Thursday, December 4, 2003

[presidio9]

Sandra Jolly said her 6-year-old son's Christmas was spoiled when his teacher told the first-grade class Monday that "Santa Claus is make-believe."

"He had this sad, lost puppy dog look on his face. This unhappy, empty look," Jolly said. "He said his teacher informed the entire class that Santa is make-believe."

[Howlin]

For most kids they have a long time to develop into cynics.

See #205. :-)

[jwalsh07]

Do you want me to leave you alone?

Nah, I have nothing to do for a bit, I may as well dissuade you of some foolish notions.

Here is what you wrote:

Therefore, withholding truth is different from lying by omission

Do you not see the folly of this? You are saying that withholding truth (being untruthful by omission) is different from lying (being untruthful) by omission.

Clintonian logic.

[TomB]

Excuse me, did they make up their own imaginary friends or did you?

We both did. I encourage her to interact.

Does she know that she is pretending?

A four year old, no.

Did she make up Santa, OR DID YOU?

Seeing as how Santa is rather ubiquitous, nobody around here "made him up".

Does she know that YOU ARE PRETENDING?

No.

[Terabitten]

Parents shouldn't teach their kids about "Santa"...it's just too representative of the commercialization of Christmas. Jesus Christ should be the center of attention...and I am afraid Santa has become the center of attention for far too many people.

I agree. As the father of a four year old, I've had to be very careful about this. Whenever my daughter brings up the topic of Santa ("Daddy, will Santa bring me a Barbie?") I ask her if it would be okay if I brought her one instead of Santa. She always says yes. Then, I ask her what Christmas is really about. The answer is invariable "It's Jesus' birthday" or something to that effect. I think even at 4 she knows that there isn't much to the Santa story.

[Howlin]

You're making me out to be ridiculous

You're doing that all by yourself; I never "help" when somebody is doing such a great whack job on themselves.

[Howlin]

What problem do you have with making sure that your child knows that make-believe is exactly that?

I can tell you don't have children; you cannot do that if they are under about six.

And if you do have children, God help them.

[don-o]

so many of the morons on this thread who can't suspend reality for a moment don't get is that the notion of Santa Claus is a SYMBOL for the spirit of giving - appropriately attached to the season of Christmas, when God gave his Son to the world as the way to their salvation.

Tell the truth.

The American Santa is a "symbol" of getting, no giving. You know I'm right.

[TomB]

I really feel bad for their kids. What a drab, stark, er, FACTFUL life it must be.

"OK honey, you can play with your dolls, as long a you realize THEY AREN'T REAL."

[FLAMING DEATH]

Hmmm...interesting.

I don't want to jump to conclusions, but it sounds as if you're not too concerned that your children have a firm grounding in reality. And since you said you would "NEVER" try to change that, I wonder what will happen to them over the next few years.

Having taught for a few years, I have seen kids like this. They don't understand why their actions have consequences. They get used to blaming someone else for their problems. By the time they get to my grade level, however, they start blaming real people for the things they do. At that point, the behavior is already established.

So, if your kid starts blaming their bad behaviors on imaginary friends, how would you deal with that?

[Ladytotheright]

Why7 couldn't Santa bring her the Barbie; aren't you Santa? you sound very LIBERAL

[TomB]

What problem do you have with making sure that your child knows that make-believe is exactly that?

BECAUSE THEY'RE KIDS!!!

[Enough is ENOUGH]

I learned the truth through logical deduction. Well, kind of.

I was in fifth grade returning to school after the Christmas break. A bunch of kids I knew were milling around the classroom where I entered. I asked, "what did Santa bring you?" Just then I saw one girl with a pathetic look on her face and with raised eyebrows turn to another girl and whisper, "doesn't he know?" That's when I put it all together and thought to myself, well, I guess those rumors are true.

The following year I had a similar classroom revelation about the stork. That one was more incredulous to me.

The toughest revelation was a year after that when a friend's mother told me that politicians were crooks. I've been skeptical ever since.

[dmanLA]

"A four year old knows that her makebelieve friends are makebelieve? When she talks to her dolls, she knows they aren't real freinds? Do you have ANY IDEA of the imagination of a child?

Never mind, you obviously don't."

I have a four year old and he definitely knows the difference between reality and pretend. I was playing pretend with him and at one point I said "Really?" and his response was "Silly Daddy, I was just pretending..."

If your kid doesn't know the difference, you better teach them. The earlier the better. Have you seen the programs on TV? Otherwise, your kid is vulnerable of copying the antics on TV not knowing that what they are seeing is NOT REAL.

[jwalsh07]

The American Santa is a "symbol" of getting, no giving. You know I'm right.

You're wrong. My kids when they were young, and now my grandkids get the lesson of giving every Christmas when we load the truck with stuff for Toys for Tots and deliver it to the Marine Corps recruiting station.

They not only learn a lesson, they get joy from doing it.

[Hodar]

My response was specifically to your insistence that children not be "lied" to. Using your own pedantic definition of lie, I showed it is OK to "lie" to your kids.

No, you simply stated that it is OK to pretend with your kids. Let's clarify... if your child comes up to you and asks "Is Santa Real?" is your response:

a) Absolutely. Santa is as real as you and me. You've seen him in the mall, and he brings you gifts every year.
b) He embodies part of what Christmas is all about. Santa brings joy to homes, and symbolizes the love we should have for our fellow man.
c) No, Santa is just pretend. But, it is fun, isn't it?
d) Do you *really* want to know, or should we just go play with one of your toys.

If the answer is 'a'; then you have lied. Do you see the difference. I'm talking about parents who tell their kids that Santa is real, that insist that he flys around the world. There is a big difference between the 'play world' and the real world. You need not be a cynic to tell the truth. And you need not crush the magic of Christmas. If the kids want to use their imaginations, and pretend; that's great. But there are plenty of parents who do not do that.

[FLAMING DEATH]

Hmm...you pick out one phrase that is not related to the substance of my post, come up with a witty quip, and that's the discussion!

You just keep it up, buddy. Don't let those ugly things like "thinking" and "ideas" get in your way. Go for the grade school insult every time. After all, that's what Freerepublic is for.

No wonder you like the Santa Claus myth. It is becoming increasingly obvious that you think like a child yourself.

[TomB]

I don't want to jump to conclusions, but it sounds as if you're not too concerned that your children have a firm grounding in reality.

My four year old, no.

And since you said you would "NEVER" try to change that, I wonder what will happen to them over the next few years.

Um, they grow up?

Having taught for a few years, I have seen kids like this. They don't understand why their actions have consequences. They get used to blaming someone else for their problems. By the time they get to my grade level, however, they start blaming real people for the things they do. At that point, the behavior is already established.

Ah yes, projection.

No, My older kids are quite well grounded. No dicipline problems, no imaginary friends.

You see, as they GET OLDER, they grow out of those things.

So, if your kid starts blaming their bad behaviors on imaginary friends, how would you deal with that?

My four year old? I'd tell her the truth, that I knew she was lying.

[FLAMING DEATH]

Again, you didn't respond to the question.

What problem do you have with making sure that your child knows that make-believe is exactly that?

[Howlin]

Why bother? It would just cause a conflict in their little TENSE minds.......no dolls, no Santa; perhaps they could just go straight from Little Gym to work!!!!

Do they know there's no Farmer in the Dell? No Big Bad Wolf??

[woodyinscc]

If you ask me, perpetuating a myth to a child for the first several years of his life, then dismissing it as "a bit of fun" is way more Clintonesque than leveling with a kid from the beginning.

Your argument is specious, Santa Claus is myth, tradition, and heritage all rolled into one. It has been passed down for generations, in good times and bad. Kids will be kids until they grow older, to them the realization that Santa is not real, is a rite of passage, on their way to adulthood.