Teacher tells kids Santa is 'make-believe' (1st graders)

AP ^ | Thursday, December 4, 2003

[presidio9]

Sandra Jolly said her 6-year-old son's Christmas was spoiled when his teacher told the first-grade class Monday that "Santa Claus is make-believe."

"He had this sad, lost puppy dog look on his face. This unhappy, empty look," Jolly said. "He said his teacher informed the entire class that Santa is make-believe."

[FLAMING DEATH]

Interesting that you chose that response rather than to refute what I said.

Exactly what part of what I wrote did you disagree with?

[TomB]

If your kid is under the impression that it is no longer make-believe and that the imaginary friend is real, you most certainly are lying to them. Are you saying this is what your daughter believes?

A FOUR YEAR OLD!? OF COURSE!

You seem to have this desire to force your children into adult realities right off the bat. For cryin' out loud, let them be kids.

[Libertina]

ROTFLOL

[jwalsh07]

Well, I had a teacher that told me there was no Santa, and my mother went over to the school and told the teacher there was a Santa and Santa didn't like her--that's why he never came...lol

Big ole Saint Nick belly laugh.

[Hodar]

A four year old knows that her makebelieve friends are makebelieve?

This is the first time you mentioned a 4 yr old. Now, at some level the child probably knows that her dolls are not alive. They don't eat, walk, sleep or move. But, pretty much all children play and pretend. It's part of growing up.

However, this article was not about pretending with dolls. It was not about a 4 yr old, it was about a 1st grade teacher, and a 1st grade student. I would certainly hope that at 1st grade, the child would be more emotionally developed than a 4 year old. Be consistent.

[cyncooper]

The teacher told the kids the truth, and some parents can't handle the truth.

Get a grip, Mr. Grinch. The teacher was way out of bounds, period.

As to comparing Santa to "parents can't handle the truth", nonsense. Are you saying the parents believe in Santa, too?

[jwalsh07]

Exactly what part of what I wrote did you disagree with?

Almost everything.

[FLAMING DEATH]

"And I've never done that with Santa either."

So, you're saying that your child knows that Santa is a figment of someone's imagination? Kudos to you.

"Either it is a lie, or it isn't. Which is it?"

Make-believe isn't a lie as long as everyone involved understands it to be make-believe. Would you agree with this?

[cyncooper]

I finally figured it out after somebody made the mistake of leaving a price tag on one of the stocking stuffers. "Wait a minute, since when does Santa charge for toys?" That's when my parents said, "son, we need to talk."

To this day we have abided by the "don't ask, don't tell" concept regarding Santa. My parents never had to address it directly with any of us, and we didn't feel the need to inform them we knew.

[BSunday]

Yep, Santa is the ultimate tool for parents to get their kids do what they want to do

I suppose you learned that in your massive parenting experience of 2 whole years ?

[brewcrew]

What so many of the morons on this thread who can't suspend reality for a moment don't get is that the notion of Santa Claus is a SYMBOL for the spirit of giving - appropriately attached to the season of Christmas, when God gave his Son to the world as the way to their salvation. Santa Claus represents the spirit of giving. But little kids have a difficult, if not impossible time comprehending anything symbolic. It's not about lying - it's about giving them something concrete that stands for giving instead of getting.

In our house, if you don't profess a "belief" in Santa, well, then he doesn't exist. And he doesn't bring you anything either.

[dmanLA]

"Let's say you come into the room and your four year old is playing with her dolls sitting around a table having a tea party. Do you:

a. Sit down and have her introduce you to her imaginary friends and stike up a nice conversation.

b. Grab her, shaking her violently and screaming "For crying out loud, they're only dolls!! They aren't real!!!"

Excuse me, did they make up their own imaginary friends or did you? Does she know that she is pretending?

Did she make up Santa, OR DID YOU? Does she know that YOU ARE PRETENDING?

[Howlin]

Make-believe isn't a lie as long as everyone involved understands it to be make-believe.

Don't you think we should all make our kids sign a TOS before we can assume that they, under the age of 6, understand it's all make-believe?

[FLAMING DEATH]

ok....elaborate?

Explain to me how having the discretion to withhold information from your child which they may not be prepared to deal with is the same as making intentionally false statements, or statements that are misleading because they aren't factually complete?

If you ask me, perpetuating a myth to a child for the first several years of his life, then dismissing it as "a bit of fun" is way more Clintonesque than leveling with a kid from the beginning.

But, since you posted two one-sentence responses, I guess you don't really have an argument to offer me.

Do you want me to leave you alone?

[cyncooper]

Apparently, Ms. Codner didn't immediately inform the students that Santa Claus was make-believe. Seems to me, that somehow the class reached that conclusion after a little deductive reasoning.

Apparently she guided them along to the inevitable conclusion, and was not about to let the matter go until she had demonstrated that Santa is not real. There was no reason to use Santa Claus as her subject in the lesson. She could have steered the discussion in another direction.

[LandofLincoln]

LIke that ever works

[don-o]

Sorry.

When kids are playing their own games, and invite an adult in, the proper answer is "Very nice."

That is not a lie, if you can see through a child's eyes.

[TomB]

This is the first time you mentioned a 4 yr old.

I see you read as well as you reason. This is from my post 185:

"Let's say you come into the room and your four year old is playing with her dolls sitting around a table having a tea party. Do you:"

Now, at some level the child probably knows that her dolls are not alive. They don't eat, walk, sleep or move. But, pretty much all children play and pretend. It's part of growing up.

No, children of that age have imaginations, or, shall we say, SHOULD have imaginations that can produce things as real as this desk I'm typing on. It isn't wrong, it's healthy.

For most kids they have a long time to develop into cynics.

However, this article was not about pretending with dolls.

My response was specifically to your insistence that children not be "lied" to. Using your own pedantic definition of lie, I showed it is OK to "lie" to your kids.

[TomB]

Make-believe isn't a lie as long as everyone involved understands it to be make-believe. Would you agree with this?

I have no doubt that my kids believe their makebelieve friends are real. And I NEVER try to change that.

[FLAMING DEATH]

I see. You're making me out to be ridiculous, because I suggest that you don't let your kids imaginations run away with them to the point that they believe things that are untrue.

So, I assume by this that you advocate the opposite of what I said?

It is hard to get any meaning out of such a sarcastic response. I get the impression that you're trying to sidetrack me.

Not exactly the type of argument I'd expect to see posted here. Nevermind the fact that you didn't respond to the ideas I actually wrote.

What problem do you have with making sure that your child knows that make-believe is exactly that?