AMERICA- The Right Way!!(Day 927)[Davis Recall Watch-65 Days to Go!]

21 posted on 08/05/2003 5:44:10 AM PDT by Mr. Mulliner (I could be a really good Christian if other people didn't mess me up all the time.)

To: ABG(anybody but Gore)

22 posted on 08/05/2003 5:44:53 AM PDT by Dog (: "And good ol' boys were drinking whiskey and rye, singing 'This'll be the day Saddam dies...'")

To: Mr. Mulliner

23 posted on 08/05/2003 5:47:35 AM PDT by bmwcyle (Here's to Hillary's book sinking like the Clinton 2000 economy)

24 posted on 08/05/2003 5:49:37 AM PDT by bmwcyle (Here's to Hillary's book sinking like the Clinton 2000 economy)

A Little Humor for this cloudy Virginia Morning:

Subject: Special Forces and the Media

News Anchor Dan Rather, NPR Reporter Cokie Roberts, and an American Special Forces soldier were hiking through the jungle one day when they were captured by cannibals. They were tied up, led to the village and brought before the chief.

The chief said, "I am familiar with your western custom of granting the condemned a last wish. Before we kill and eat you, do you have any last requests?"

Rather said, "Well, I'm a Texan; so I'd like one last bowlful of hot, spicy chili." The chief nodded to an underling, who left and returned with the chili. Rather ate it all and said, "Now I can die content."

Cokie Roberts said, "I'm a reporter to the end. I want to take out my tape recorder and describe the scene here and what's about to happen. Maybe someday someone will hear it and know that I was on the job 'til the end." The chief directed an aide to hand over the tape recorder, and Roberts dictated some comments. She then said, "Now I can die happy."

The chief turned and said, "And now, Mr. Special Forces soldier, what is your final wish?" "Kick me in the ass," said the green beret. "What?" asked the chief. "Will you mock us in your last hour?" "No, I'm not kidding. I want you to kick me in the ass," insisted the green beret.

So the chief shoved him into the open, and kicked him in the ass. The green beret went sprawling, but rolled to his knees, pulled a 9mm pistol from his waistband, and shot the chief dead. In the resulting confusion, he grabbed his M16 out of the hands of a captor and sprayed the cannibals with gunfire.

In a flash, the cannibals were dead or fleeing for their lives.

As the Special Forces soldier was untying the others, Roberts asked him, "Why did you ask them to kick you in the ass? Why didn't you just shoot them?"

"What!?" growled the green beret, "And have you media assholes call me the aggressor?!?"

25 posted on 08/05/2003 5:56:11 AM PDT by Redleg Duke (Stir the pot...don't let anything settle to the bottom where the lawyers can feed off of it!)

I'm so glad to see Mallard taking on the NAACP. Wish there would be a groundswell against those commies.

26 posted on 08/05/2003 5:56:48 AM PDT by Mr. Mulliner (I could be a really good Christian if other people didn't mess me up all the time.)

Ha!!!!!!!

I love it!

27 posted on 08/05/2003 5:58:21 AM PDT by Neets

28 posted on 08/05/2003 6:02:24 AM PDT by Mr. Mulliner (I could be a really good Christian if other people didn't mess me up all the time.)

Wanna hear something funny? On my mail route there is a nudist colony. Yesterday we delivered a clothing sample to them....free pantyhose!

29 posted on 08/05/2003 6:10:59 AM PDT by Mr. Mulliner (I could be a really good Christian if other people didn't mess me up all the time.)

To: Mr. Mulliner

30 posted on 08/05/2003 6:17:01 AM PDT by Neets

For those who are feeling a little older and missing those great old
tunes, there is good news! Some of our favorite artists have re-released their
great hits with new lyrics to accommodate their aging audience.

These were re-written for those of us who admit to being over 39 years
old, like me enjoy.

Herman's Hermits - "Mrs. Brown, You've Got A Lovely Walker"

The Bee Gees - "How Can You Mend A Broken Hip"

The Temptations - "Papa's Got A Kidney Stone"

Nancy Sinatra - "These Boots Aren't Made For Bunions"

The Beatles - "I Get By With A Little Help From My Depends"

Marvin Gaye - "I Heard It Through The Grape Nuts"

Procol Haren - "A Whiter Shade Of Hair"

Johnny Nash - "I Can't See Clearly Now"

Leo Sayer - "You Make Me Feel Like Napping"

ABBA - "Denture Queen"

Paul Simon - "Fifty Ways To Lose Your Liver"

Roberta Flack - "The First Time I Ever Forgot Your Face"

Commodores - "Once, Twice, Three Times To The Bathroom"

Rolling Stones - "You Can't Always Pee When You Want"

Bobby Darin - "Splish, Splash, I Was Havin' A Flash"

31 posted on 08/05/2003 6:17:24 AM PDT by Neets

"Ping-a-ling-ling-ling"

You rang??? ;^)

32 posted on 08/05/2003 6:41:01 AM PDT by MozartLover

33 posted on 08/05/2003 6:41:33 AM PDT by Neets

LOL

I can relate to the Commodores..........

34 posted on 08/05/2003 6:43:02 AM PDT by MozartLover

To: lysie; *ATRW

Good morning lysie & all!

Gotta scoot; BBL.

35 posted on 08/05/2003 6:45:55 AM PDT by MozartLover

I am saving that ...look at all the new taglines....:-)

36 posted on 08/05/2003 7:05:31 AM PDT by Dog (: "And good ol' boys were drinking whiskey and rye, singing 'This'll be the day Saddam dies...'")

37 posted on 08/05/2003 7:34:59 AM PDT by bmwcyle (Here's to Hillary's book sinking like the Clinton 2000 economy)

The New York Times has been "dowdifying" Mel Gibson for his new movie, taking his quotes out of context to make him appear anti-semitic.

PaleoJudaica.com: More on Mel and the Passion

38 posted on 08/05/2003 9:50:50 AM PDT by Mr. Mulliner (I could be a really good Christian if other people didn't mess me up all the time.)

To: Mr. Mulliner

You're kidding right???
In Tennessee?

39 posted on 08/05/2003 9:52:45 AM PDT by Guenevere (...a Florida resident for almost 30 years!!)

To: Mr. Mulliner

...#29....You're kidding?

40 posted on 08/05/2003 9:53:42 AM PDT by Guenevere (...a Florida resident for almost 30 years!!)

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