Posted on 06/15/2003 12:24:21 PM PDT by f.Christian
IMHO (In My Humble Opinion) © Unshackled
Norman Liebmann
In my humble opinion, Bill Clinton should make amends to America by arranging a fishing trip for Hillary with Scott Peterson. (Hillary could give our regards to Lucca Brazzi.)
In my humble opinion Hillary’s book should be called “Nothing new. Nothing true.”
In my humble opinion, there should be an automatic life sentence for making anything go "boom!"
In my humble opinion, Arabs are a species of bug – and even if they aren’t, they should be squashed anyway.
In my humble opinion, Jayson Blair notwithstanding, Bill Clinton is still the main gauge of how many career miles can be squeezed out of a lie.
In my humble opinion, Al Franken is moronic and ugly – but not necessarily in that order.
In my humble opinion, on his best day on this planet, Yasser Arafat looks like Dorian Gray’s passport photo.
In my humble opinion, Hillary Clinton has a smile that can curdle embalming fluid.
In my humble opinion, there is one really good thing about Jesse Jackson - which has yet to occur to me.
In my humble opinion, a homosexual has become a bishop of the Episcopal Church. Now he can slip into one of those long gowns without waiting for the Gay Pride Parade.
In my humble opinion, Howell Raines should take over as Editor of The Tanganyika Times where his favoritism will be a little less noticeable. (After years of hearing the expression “the white man’s burden”, Jayson Blair has finally given the world a name that goes with it.)
In my humble opinion, Hans Blix should have taken Monica Lewinsky with him to Iraq. If nothing else she could have found a few Weapons of Mass Ejaculation.
In my humble opinion, the Israelis are finding out they can’t count on the word of George Bush any more than the conservatives who voted for him.
In my humble opinion, it’s a toss up which Chelsea Clinton hates to admit most – that she’s the daughter of Bill and Hillary, or that she’s the Fourth Dixie Chick.
In my humble opinion, Richard Gephart's extravagant new medical care plan includes money to buy additional bedpans that the orderlies can use as Frisbees in the hospital parking lot.
In my humble opinion, there is something wrong with Bush letting the lights stay on at night during our air raids on Baghdad while Gray Davis was letting the lights go out at night all over California.
In my humble opinion, America needs another Clinton in the White House like a tourist in Mexico needs an enema.
In my humble opinion, you can be sure, in times of tragedy, even though Bill Clinton is laughing on the outside, he’s also laughing on the inside.
In my humble opinion, Martha Stewart is getting leaned on by the Feds because she’s smart, white, and probably changed her mind about “putting out” for Bill Clinton.
In my humble opinion, the only remarkable thing about Barbara Walters is her ability to say, “Say it isn’t so” with her eyebrows,
In my humble opinion, it’s time to cut through the bulls**t and re-name Washington D.C. the District of Clinton.
In my humble opinion, having forced South Carolina to take down its Confederate flag, the NAACP will next demand the Washington Monument be made available for Oprah Winfrey to use as a mooring mast.
In my humble opinion, Bubba’s upcoming book should be called, “Bill Clinton’s Rectalization of American Politics”. It should be reviewed in The Proctologists’ Quarterly - and they could shove up their back page.
In my humble opinion, whatever the gooks did to John McCain in the Hanoi Hilton, it doesn’t seem to have rehabilitated him.
In my humble opinion, whether Iraq had Weapons of Mass Destruction or not, Saddam Hussein needed killing.
In my humble opinion, a recent poll reveals, as the Democrat nominee for President, Carol Mosely Braun would win ninety percent of the black vote. The poll also showed she would win one hundred percent of the black vote if she changed her name to Idi Mosely Amin.
In my humble opinion, every time Senator Robert Byrd makes a speech he proves that you’re never too old to be too old.
In my humble opinion, the program of giving a tax refund to a person who does not pay any tax should be called Recipient Oink–ism.
In my humble opinion, The South should keep in mind that Grant did not let Lee keep his sword and his honor just so that someday Maxine Waters could metaphorically pull down his pants.
In my humble opinion, if elephants can get along without ankles so can Hillary Clinton, Should she decide to run in 2004, she will give new meaning to the term “stumping.”
In my humble opinion, Kofi Annan couldn’t care less about what’s happening in Iraq, as long as someone comes to his office every day and puts down fresh straw. (He never had it so good.)
In my humble opinion, it’s beginning to look as though the only ones who still “Remember the Alamo” are the Mexicans.
In my humble opinion, Bill Clinton is not only the first black President but also America’s first white tar baby.
In my humble opinion, life in this country would improve immeasurably if we could find a way to stop the government and the media from acting as shills for each other.
Norman Liebmann is a columnist and former Television writer (Johnny Carson, Dean Martin; wrote and produced Chico and the Man, and created the characters for The Munsters - who are all named after his relatives). Please visit his website ... Firehat.com --- a treasure trove of articles and humor.
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