Posted on 03/06/2003 11:33:29 AM PST by Blue Scourge
Man Sues Tom Ridge Over Duct Tape Fears
Corona, CA - Tom Ridge's advice to Americans to stock up on duct tape and plastic has sparked a lawsuit which has been filed against him, the Department of Homeland Security and President George W. Bush.
Steven J. Bosell, the owner of B & B Construction in Corona, California, has filed a lawsuit claiming emotional distress, personal injury and sexual dysfunction after he wrapped his "privates" in duct tape to protect them from a biological attack.
"After watching Mr. Ridge on television advising us to stock up on duct tape and plastic, I went to the local Costco and bought $100 worth of duct tape to protect myself", Bosell said. "When I got home, I taped up my windows and doors. After I did that I realized if survivors like myself are going to reproduce and populate the Earth after a biological attack, we have to protect our privates as well."
Bosell claimed in his lawsuit he wrapped his "privates" in duct tape as test of "Homeland Security". When he tried to remove the tape, Bosell injured himself when the tape began peeling off skin and body hair. After calling an ambulance, Bosell was taken to the hospital where the doctors and nurses laughed at him.
"I told the doctors and nurses at the hospital if they laughed, I would file a lawsuit against them and the hospital. They laughed anyways and I now have another lawsuit pending" Bosell said with tears streaming down his face. "They went out their way to make me look like a fool. Once I saw the doctors scalpel go toward my privates, I totally lost it and blacked out".
Also named in the lawsuit is the President of the United States, George W. Bush. "President Bush is just as liable for injury to my reproductive future because he hired Mr. Ridge to run the Department of Homeland Security and Mr. Ridge gave the nation bad advice. They also make me look like a fool." Bosell sobbed.
The Department of Homeland Security and the Bush Administration have no comment on Mr. Bosell's lawsuit.
Corona times,
No, I think you managed to do that all on your own.
Does B & B stand for Beavis & Butthead?? It sure should!
Corona Times. The editor of this community-newspaper is local Democratic district leader Jim Lisa. He's a knowledgeable source on Corona's history and politics. He's also a great link to the Italian community there.
This is from :
Corona/Elmhurst
Elected Officials/Political Organizations
Councilwoman Helen Marshall's Elmhurst Office -- (718) 507-0813. Spokeswoman is Sharon Anderson.
Marshall has offices in East Elmhurst and Corona.
Community Board 4. Rose Rothschild is the district manager.
Police
110th Police Precinct. 91-41 43rd Ave., Elmhurst, NY. The community officers are Noel Colon and Mike Piacenza. (718) 476-9310.
Community Organizations/Civic Leaders
Roe Daraio. Community Organized for Elmhust Maspeth 50. (718) 639-1400. Daraio works in Councilmember McCaffrey's district office in Maspeth, but lives in S. Elmhurst. Her group -- COMET -- handles issues that straddle three community boards and council districts.
Lucy Schilero, (718) 426-6767.
Schilero chairs the 110 Precinct Community Council and is the head of CURSE. She formed CURSE because the 110th Pct. Community Council is limited by its charter as a governmental apparatus. CURSE is a non-profit.
Joseph Lisa Community Center. The Lisa center is a meeting hall for various civic groups in Corona. Anthony Caminiti, the director, is a tremendous resource on the history and politics of Corona. (718) 271-1986.
Corona Preservation Senior Centers. 108-74th. Roosevelt Ave., Corona, NY. Charlayne Batista is the contact. (718) 639-2000.
Dominican American Society of Queens.
(718) 457-5395.
Joe Neufeld, (718) 424-4000.
Joe Neufeld is a longtime resident and expert on Elmhurst's history.
Schools
Community School District 24. 8000 Cooper AVE. Glendale, NY 11385. Mary Crowley, president, (718) 417-2693. Joseph Quinn, superintendent, (718) 417-2600.
Churches
St. Leo's Catholic Church. 104-05 49th Ave., Corona, NY. Sister. Joan Dawber and Father Keeney can be reached at (718) 592-7969. Father Keeney is very knowledgeable about things in the neighborhood.
Queens Ledger. (718) 429-1234. The Ledger is one of a group of community-based newspapers in Queens that will
Corona Times. The editor of this community-newspaper is local Democratic district leader Jim Lisa. He's a knowledgeable source on Corona's history and politics. He's also a great link to the Italian community there.
Hey, they didn't put the duct tape on your schlong.
(I wonder if something like this is how The Bent One got that way....)
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