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Olsen Twins Arrested at Anti-War Demonstration (PARODY)
www.BSNN.net ^ | Vanity Dregs

Posted on 01/22/2003 7:47:40 AM PST by goliath

Olsen Twins Arrested at Anti-War Demonstration


By Vanity Dregs
BSNN.net Headline News

Dressed in the latest design from the Olsen Twins' G.I. Jane Collection, Ashley Olsen is dragged to jail after she jumped the fence surrounding the White House. President and Mrs. Bush were unhurt.

WASHINGTONDeclaring they are convinced Saddam Hussein isn’t such a bad guy and therefore "there is no need for war," Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen (the Olsen Twins) led a spontaneous anti-war demonstration that ended in their arrest outside the White House. Both Mary-Kate and Ashley are demanding that President Bush use diplomacy to end the crisis with Iraq .  

"All this talk of war is freaking us out," Mary-Kate told BSNN.net, "and after watching a rerun of China Beach , Ashley and I are convinced there is a better way."

Being entertainers, the Olsen Twins are longtime political activists whose first protest—shortly after their birth in 1986—was against the Reagan Administration’s support of the Nicaraguan Contras. Predictably, the twins also opposed the use of force to remove Manuel Noriega and won widespread respect in Hollywood when they protested the Gulf War by refusing to eat pizza until it was over.

Mary-Kate Olsen is gagged and arrested in Lafayette Square during a spontaneous anti-war rally near the White House. 

The twins seem unconcerned about a public backlash against their strong political stand and hope that their status as superstars can help sway some people to the anti-war camp.

"President Bush has declared 'either with us or against us,'" sneered Ashley, "and Mary-Kate and I refuse to allow that doo-doo brain to speak for us. He ain’t exactly Josiah Bartlett, ya know."

Insisting that they are patriotic Americans and agreeing in principle that Saddam Hussein should not be allowed to have weapons of mass destruction, the twins argue that just because President Bush and Saddam Hussein are angry at each other, that’s no reason to become violent.

To further their goal of altering the course of history, the twins have released a new song and music video, "Give Appeasement a Chance," which they hope President Bush and Saddam Hussein will use as anger management.

 "If I’m angry or in a bad mood, I put on really loud music and dance around my room until I feel better," explained Ashley. "And that’s what we are urging President Bush and Saddam Hussein to do, too."

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TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS:
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To: SarahW
And a great joke it is!

But for real.....C-Span will air The Pro-Life Rally live, today at noon. Watch if you can, because they sure won't replay it as often as they are last night's NARAL dinner with democratic presidential candidates.

21 posted on 01/22/2003 8:03:25 AM PST by YaYa123
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To: PBRSTREETGANG
Wow, it's the most realistic satire I've ever seen in my life. LOL. Why would anyone think that it's not true, knowing how flaky the hollyweird left it?
22 posted on 01/22/2003 8:04:32 AM PST by American Blood
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To: goliath
Completely staged.
23 posted on 01/22/2003 8:04:33 AM PST by rintense (Go Get 'Em Dubya!)
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To: SauronOfMordor
BTW, the article is a HUMOR PARODY, for those who don't get it.

I saw it on the internet, it must be true!

24 posted on 01/22/2003 8:05:54 AM PST by csvset (P.T. Barnum would have loved the internet, so many rubes, so little time.)
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To: goliath
I await the 'Gary Coleman And Emmanuel Lewis Arrested For Undisclosed Reason' headline...
25 posted on 01/22/2003 8:07:07 AM PST by F16Fighter
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To: goliath

  The mug shots...

 

 

 


26 posted on 01/22/2003 8:10:11 AM PST by Fintan (It don't mean a thing if it ain't got that swing...)
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To: cactusSharp
their real worth is 300 million AFTER TAXES

Cactus, what's your source?

I'm asking because the current issue of People (I know, I know) has them on the cover, and an article about wealthy teens. The magazine has them pegged at $76 million.

They're still young enough that a good conservative influence upon them could go a long way.

27 posted on 01/22/2003 8:17:03 AM PST by Freebird Forever
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To: goliath
Olsen Twins Arrested...

Who are they?

28 posted on 01/22/2003 8:19:28 AM PST by FreePaul
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To: Freebird Forever
do your homework...the 76 is last yrs annual
29 posted on 01/22/2003 8:21:38 AM PST by cactusSharp
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To: FreePaul
From the hit TV show 'Full House'. If you have teenage daughters, you would know!


30 posted on 01/22/2003 8:26:36 AM PST by MadelineZapeezda
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To: SarahW
truthfully I had to go back and look for a humor tag,
which there is not one on the post.
however, I did figure out it was a joke fairly quickly, good one

LOL
31 posted on 01/22/2003 8:28:58 AM PST by vin-one (I wish i had something clever to put in this tag)
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To: cactusSharp
do your homework...the 76 is last yrs annual

The article says Total fortune: $76 Million.

Not annual income.

Again, cite your source.

32 posted on 01/22/2003 8:30:58 AM PST by Freebird Forever
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To: Freebird Forever
I'll find and link the FORBES source
33 posted on 01/22/2003 8:33:32 AM PST by cactusSharp
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To: MadelineZapeezda
Missed Full House also. Had a teenage granddaughter live with us for quite a while. I guess she didn't know about it either.
34 posted on 01/22/2003 8:35:15 AM PST by FreePaul
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To: cactusSharp
I'd be willing to accept Forbes over People.
35 posted on 01/22/2003 8:38:37 AM PST by Freebird Forever
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To: Freebird Forever
Again, cite your source.

Hmmmmm. I'd just like to point out that, ultimately, you're getting all worked up about an Olsen Twins parody. Seems to me there's bigger problems to worry about -- like whether it's time to change the air in your spare tire.

36 posted on 01/22/2003 8:38:38 AM PST by r9etb
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To: YaYa123
The Ashley Twins = Scott Ritter Dream Team

The Ashley Twins = Austin Powers Dream Team as well.

37 posted on 01/22/2003 8:41:39 AM PST by Centurion2000
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To: American Blood
Why would anyone think that it's not true, knowing how flaky the hollyweird left it?

The source, Bull S*** News Network, is only one reason why.

38 posted on 01/22/2003 8:42:59 AM PST by SMEDLEYBUTLER
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To: goliath
Great. More than half to posters don't realize this is a joke. These people will be cursing the Olsen twins into their old age, not realizing they have been duped.
39 posted on 01/22/2003 8:45:29 AM PST by hopespringseternal
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To: goliath
Wonder how many swallowed this whole...nice job.
40 posted on 01/22/2003 8:47:11 AM PST by wtc911
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