[Tijeras_Slim]

Get a trained monkey who can bring you your meds.

[John Jorsett]

Abuse (or extreme drunkeness) reported.

[Lazamataz]

BTTT

[JoeSixPack1]

Can you recycle spent contaminated bearing grease?

Do clams cook themselves when arosed?

Are you logged in? OOPS,,, You got a zot!

Can zots be harnessed for future zotting with out unzotting the previously zotted when zot room is at a premium?

[gitmo]

do ducks have lips?

do sponges lose their sponginess when aroused?

now that you've been cast into the pits of DU maybe your posts won't appear so stupid.

[socal_parrot]

Kind of makes me nostalgic for the old pro-McClintock threads.

[Petronski]

But where are we going to
get the 1.21 GigaZots to
power the Flux Capacitor?

Oh....trekie_boy!

[Hillary's Lovely Legs]

Here you go, trekie. Enjoy the view.

[avg_freeper]

"If I had a million dollars" Bare Naked Ladies

[Revolting cat!]

Do buffaloes have wings?

[Joe Hadenuf]

Vote yes on no.

[Revolting cat!]

Do chickens fry steaks?

[Scenic Sounds]

Isn't this thread more appropriate, boss? ;-)

[avg_freeper]

ARTIST: Barenaked Ladies TITLE: If I Had A Million Dollars

If I had a million dollars - if I had a million dollars

I'd buy you a house - I would buy you a house
If I had a million dollars - if I had a million dollars
I'd buy you furniture for your house - maybe a nice chesterfield or an ottoman
If I had a million dollars - if I had a million dollars
I'd buy you a K-Car - a nice Reliant automobile
If I had a million dollars I'd buy your love

/ A E D - / / / / / / A E D - E - - - /

If I had a million dollars I'd build a tree fort in our yard
If I had a million dollars You could help, it wouldn't be that hard
If I had a million dollars Maybe we could put a fridge in there somewhere We could go up there whenever we wanted We could get something to eat maybe

/ D E A / F#m / D E A / F#m / D E A / F#m E (hold) /

If I had a million dollars - if I had a million dollars
I'd buy you a fur coat - but not a real fur coat that's cruel
If I had a million dollars - if I had a million dollars
I'd buy you an exotic pet - like a llama or an emu
If I had a million dollars - if I had a million dollars
I'd buy you John Merrick's remains - all them crazy elephant bones
If I had a million dollars I'd buy your love

If I had a million dollars We wouldn't have to walk to the store
If I had a million dollars We'd take a limousine 'cause it costs more
If I had a million dollars We wouldn't have to eat Kraft Dinner But we would - but of course we would It's a very tasty treat for the whole family

If I had a million dollars - If I had a million dollars
I'd buy you a green dress - but not a real green dress, that's cruel
If I had a million dollars - if I had a million dollars
I'd buy you some art - a Picasso or a Garfunkel
If I had a million dollars - if I had a million dollars
I'd buy you a monkey - haven't you always wanted a monkey
If I had a million dollars I'd buy your love

If I had a million dollars, if I had a million dollars
If I had a million dollars, if I had a million dollars
If I had a million dollars, I'd be rich

[P.O.E.]

Q) What's the difference between a duck?

A) One leg is both the same.

[ladyinred]

I want a monkey.

Ah, it seems you already have one dear, it's on your back .

[Destructor]

Isn't it time for Scotty to "beam you up" now, Trekie Boy?

[avg_freeper]

They called me chicken legs
They called me four-eyes
They called me fatso
They called me buckwheat
They called me Eddie

[potlatch]

1.] A 'real green' dress is REAL green.
2.] You pull up to a limousine, roll down the window and say "Would you have any Grey Poupon dijon ketchups?
3.] Turn around, the monkey is on your back!

[DaughterOfAnIwoJimaVet]

My ancestors killed Abraham Lincoln. It haunts me still. Do you know where I can get a bucket of chicken?