Posted on 04/10/2026 10:27:24 AM PDT by V_TWIN
LAKE JACKSON, TX — After nearly nine days without a fully functioning toilet, the crew of NASA's Artemis II mission changed course from splashing down off the coast of California and instead headed straight for a Buc-ee's.
Artemis pilot Victor Glover hit the throttle as a billboard "327 miles to Buc-ee's" flashed by, with the crew still crossing their legs uncomfortably.
"I see the sign! 'Your throne awaits.' Hang in there, crew," Glover could be heard shouting over the communication channel as he prepared for touchdown. "Our cheeks are about to be sitting on the nicest toilets on this marble we call Earth. Relief awaits!"
The spacecraft made its landing on the store's roof, after which the four astronauts could be seen rushing out with their knees knocking. "Out of the way, folks! Been holding it for 250,000 miles," shouted Captain Reid Wiseman. "No time for jerky, no fudge, we've got to get to the back. We're about to achieve a totally different kind of splashdown."
At publishing time, the astronauts' return to the Kennedy Space Center had been delayed after the Buc-ee's sign lit up, indicating fresh brisket was on the board.
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It’s a shame that the first return flight around the moon in 50 years had this be one of the main topics of conversation.
Well the moon is one big Litter-box ,LOL
By the time they find a spot in the parking lot and walk to the building, well.
Better off finding a Sheetz or a newer Wawa, or even any functional McDonalds.
No need for a parking spot.....they landed on the roof! 😂
Inpired me to write a song about it
Will be very caustic, brutal
Not as bad as Mount Everest.
Between #2 and empty O2 bottles it is a trash dump at Base Camp based on my understanding.
Lotter box...
Just checked. Loiks like no bentonite on the moon.
My cat just lost interest.
Litter box...
Have to build a Buc-ees on the moon, now.
With the man in the moon famous for cheese and cows flying overhead...
They better not leave their piss jugs in the parking lot, they will ruin it for all astronauts.
Now they just go for easy, dumb, obvious "jokes" that don't even make you groan.
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