Posted on 03/13/2026 1:01:23 PM PDT by simpson96
Dear Annie: My son is getting married in July, and I’m dreading it. The woman he plans to marry is, in my view, a lying, conniving, lazy master manipulator who has worn him down so much he barely seems to care about life anymore. He doesn’t see it, but my husband and I do. He thinks she hung the moon.
She’s a complete narcissist. She’s on her phone every waking minute, and doesn’t cook, clean or care for their daughter. My son works all day, then takes care of their home and my granddaughter while she makes excuses. She believes putting on “Ms. Rachel” and sitting in the same room scrolling TikTok counts as parenting. There is little to no interaction.
She hasn’t done anything to improve their situation; if anything, life seems harder because of how she conducts herself. She’s been “working on” getting her driver’s license for four years. When things go wrong, it’s always someone else’s fault, and she casts herself as the hero in every story. Every conversation somehow circles back to her.
I truly believe he’s making the biggest mistake of his life by marrying her. She won’t change because he, and everyone else, caters to her. What can we do? -- Dreading the Wedding
Dear Dreading the Wedding: It’s painful to watch someone you love make choices you wouldn’t make yourself. Even so, this is your son’s life, and if he’s set on marrying this woman, pressure won’t change that.
Share your concerns once, calmly and respectfully. Focus on what you’ve observed and how it affects him and your granddaughter, not on attacking her character. Then step back. If you’re right and things unravel, you want him to feel safe coming to you, not defensive or embarrassed.
Sometimes the best way to help is to keep the door open and your judgment quiet. You may not be able to stop this wedding, but you can make sure your son and granddaughter always have you in their corner.
Keep the pimp hand strong and put her on the street to get your money.
“Your son is a cuck. Horse whip him.”
“The whole question of them finally marrying is pointless.”
No it’s not. Marriage means she either gets half his assets, his house, his child and an alimony-salary or just a monthly child support. Huge difference.
Sad to hear that. God Bless the child. My wife of 52 years is in long term care for dementia, a reaction to the COVID vax. The cost of her care will eventually impoverish us. I can relate to your experience.
This is the 2026 Post of the Year.
Aren’t all “Dear Abby” letters pretty much made up?
I bet she’s fat too and has zero interest in him. He will never have sex with her but her boyfriend will. She will have kids but they won’t be his. He is a loser and she knows it.
If that were my son. I would wish him well and would not attend the wedding or give him a single penny for any of the wedding or living expenses. I would at the very least try to convince him to get a prenup but he seems to have no huevos so it is all on him. Stupid should hurt.
I doubt it is even his child.
I said nothing about family courts.
You sound like a bitter divorced man. That hate and anger is going to eat you up inside.
Whatever it is right now, it's no longer "America" envisioned by our Founders.
I dimly recall it coming out that most of them were.
You forgot to mention the Huckabee “Nile to the Euphrates” Israel first crowd.
Lol.
The son of close friends of many years came close to marrying badly. The father did not see the problem but the mother did, recognizing from the start that the girlfriend did not smile and look adoringly at her son. Among other issues, her assessment was that "If you aren't equally head over heels for each other at the start, the marriage will not last."
The mother shrewdly muted her adverse comments on the match and delivered them only in private to her son. Six weeks later the son recognized that his mother was right and dropped his girlfriend.
A year and a half later he married a new girlfriend and they now have a lovely baby daughter. The video and pictures that I have seen of the couple consistently have them smiling as they steal glances at each other.
She sounds like my ex-wife.
I’m sure there are instances where Mom is right, some where she is wrong.
My first wife was much like that, except she never yelled or ordered me around. She left it to me to bathe the baby, mop the floors, wash the high chair, clean the bottles, do the laundry, vacuum the floors and change the sheets. If I brought up her lack of attention to necessary things, she would sulk and literally cry on the bed like a child. The worst thing she did was say, I’ll kill myself at the strangest times. Like riding down the freeway, she would open the door and threaten to jump.
We went to one appt with a counselor, I told her what I was living, she actually told me that I had valid reason to get a divorce. I put up with 4 years of that behavior. Nobody told me these types of parental advice BEFORE marriage, after the divorce started, my ears were filled with stories.
Hang the hurt feelings, TELL HIM YOUR TRUTH.
Of course. If mothers were always right, there would be no mother-in-law jokes.
Do not bail him out. This is a life lesson a teachable moment. Cut the cord, tough love, release your parental control. It might difficult for parents to do this, but when poor decision-making by your offspring leaves the poor fools out in the wilderness circling the drain... why get sucked into this mésalliance? Your thoughts have been made clear.
Three or four years, a divorce, child support and alimony payments will fix this stupidity. It’s all in God’s hands, no matter what Trust God.
Who knows, it might work out.
He’s set on marrying this woman, then he wonders why his friends keep calling him Mr Wimp.
Bad women and men can cause the fear of marrying again.
Bad deal learning your only good to them for a free ride and a nice insurance policy.
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