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Heaven Confirms People Who Prefer Ham At Thanksgiving Will Not Enter The Kingdom
BabylonBee.com ^
| Nov 26, 2025
| The Babylon Bee
Posted on 11/27/2025 5:05:58 AM PST by E. Pluribus Unum
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To: E. Pluribus Unum
I might bee the only person left on Earth who still likes green bean casserole.
2
posted on
11/27/2025 5:08:49 AM PST
by
Sirius Lee
("Never argue with a fool, onlookers may not be able to tell the difference.d)
To: E. Pluribus Unum
Statistics show that men who eat ham are less likely to marry 9-year-olds.
3
posted on
11/27/2025 5:09:41 AM PST
by
Tell It Right
(1 Thessalonians 5:21 -- Put everything to the test, hold fast to that which is true.)
To: Tell It Right
4
posted on
11/27/2025 5:10:57 AM PST
by
V_TWIN
(RIP Charlie Kirk)
To: E. Pluribus Unum
Don’t be no jive turkey, fool!
To: E. Pluribus Unum
We are having ham. We had turkey at Cousinsgiving on Sunday, one smoked and one fried.
6
posted on
11/27/2025 5:16:26 AM PST
by
AppyPappy
(They don't call you a Nazi because they think you are one. They do it to justify violence. )
To: Sirius Lee
You can wash down your bean salad with lime jello salad and olives.
Bon Appetit
7
posted on
11/27/2025 5:16:37 AM PST
by
Jonty30
(I've been diagnosed as being polemic and there is no cure. )
To: Jonty30
You’ve gone too far! Repent!!!
8
posted on
11/27/2025 5:19:01 AM PST
by
Sirius Lee
("Never argue with a fool, onlookers may not be able to tell the difference.d)
To: E. Pluribus Unum
Seems ham-fisted to me.... a swine way of doing things even.
9
posted on
11/27/2025 5:20:12 AM PST
by
LastDayz
(A Blunt and Brazen Texan. I Will Not Be Assimilated.)
To: LastDayz
I make good use of the hambone.
To: MarlonRando
What??? Who you talkin' to, Willis?
11
posted on
11/27/2025 5:22:05 AM PST
by
rlmorel
(Factio Communistica Sinensis Delenda Est.)
To: Sirius Lee
Actually, I still kind of like it. I usually don’t say so because you always hear a chorus of yucks.
12
posted on
11/27/2025 5:31:02 AM PST
by
dforest
To: E. Pluribus Unum
Since we’ve moved to Tennessee, we’ve been enjoying a new tradition for Thanksgiving: A rack of BBQ spare ribs, coleslaw and cornbread.
13
posted on
11/27/2025 5:31:20 AM PST
by
Bloody Sam Roberts
(Perfection is impossible. But if you pursue perfection you may achieve excellence - - Vince Lombardi)
To: Jonty30
I’d rather face the fires of eternal damnation than eat that jello salad slop.
14
posted on
11/27/2025 5:40:00 AM PST
by
Liz
("Socialism is a wonderful idea. It's just that it's been disastrous." Thomas Sowell. )
To: AppyPappy
We are having ham. We had turkey
on Sunday, one smoked and one fried.
Well you can just go to hell is the way I heard it.
15
posted on
11/27/2025 5:42:35 AM PST
by
Liz
("Socialism is a wonderful idea. It's just that it's been disastrous." Thomas Sowell. )
To: Bloody Sam Roberts
I’d rather have supreme pizza or some grilled burgers along with coleslaw and fries or maybe onion rings.
16
posted on
11/27/2025 5:43:34 AM PST
by
wally_bert
(I cannot be sure for certain, but in my personal opinion I am certain that I am not sure..)
To: Jonty30
Are those discarded cigarette butts amidst the olives and shredded carrots?
To: Liz
I didn’t get a vote. However there are free dinners locally that are available and they include the blessed sacrament (turkey and stuffing).
18
posted on
11/27/2025 5:46:56 AM PST
by
AppyPappy
(They don't call you a Nazi because they think you are one. They do it to justify violence. )
To: E. Pluribus Unum
19
posted on
11/27/2025 5:50:13 AM PST
by
equaviator
(Nobody's perfect. That's why they put pencils on erasers!)
To: AppyPappy
I didn’t get a vote.
Nevertheless, you were caught on tape eating ham......you are doomed.
20
posted on
11/27/2025 5:50:13 AM PST
by
Liz
("Socialism is a wonderful idea. It's just that it's been disastrous." Thomas Sowell. )
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