Posted on 10/15/2025 9:29:26 AM PDT by Red Badger
According to OregonLive, Chezarae Walter got pulled over speeding out of a WinCo Supermarket while driving a stolen vehicle she had put through the wringer.
But despite the prosecution's objections, the judge let her off...
...with the payment of one Baja Blast Mountain Dew.
Why one Baja Blast?
The owner of the stolen vehicle, Peter Higginbotham (yes, really), recognized his 1996 Toyota Camry because it had a funny bumper sticker that read:
"The book value of my car is one Baja Blast."
Being a typical bleeding heart Portlander, Higginbotham didn't want to see Chezarae go to jail for stealing his car, so he asked the judge if Chezarae and him could work out a civil compromise instead: One Baja Blast for one car.
Practically the first words out of Multnomah County Circuit Judge Jeffrey Auxier's mouth were, ‘You worked out a smoking hot agreement!'
Because that how judges in Portland talk, you know.
Prosecutor Jacob Rhoads asked the judge not to approve the civil compromise, calling the resolution ‘not appropriate' and noting that the woman had prior property crime and theft convictions.
But the judge overruled him saying,
The bottom line is the victim in this case doesn't want this to proceed, and I've heard enough to be satisfied that you are on a path in life that has potential. The state has enough cases to prosecute.
Higgenbotham got his Baja Blast (which he doesn't even like), Chezarae walked free and clear, and the insurance company got stuck with a $1,700 bill for the 30-year-old car she destroyed.
Portland!
I'll have to try this next time I'm before a judge as a defendant.
"Your honor, I do not wish this case to proceed. I'm just getting my life back together."
Hope the judge has a rude awakening soon.
>>the insurance company got stuck with a $1,700 bill for the 30-year-old car she destroyed.
The real victims of this crime. If the owner agreed to compensation for the loss of the vehicle, there should have been no insurance claim.
Democrat judges are a clear and present threat to America and democracy.
This whole situation is obscene, but I wouldn’t worry about the insurance company; they never lose any money. They just pass it on to their customers.
True! If he in effect "declines to press charges" after the verdict, it's out of his hands. If the whole thing was not really a biggie, then he can decline the insurance settlement--can't he?
Insurance company:
"What's that, bro? You still want the insurance payout? Dude! So sorry. Now we have no reason to think you didn't collude with the thief to pick up some cash. Can you prove you didn't?
"Get back to us any time. We're in no hurry."
“Hope the judge has a rude awakening soon.”
Karma needs to hit a million times more often than it does.
Portland eh. Socialist area so property crimes are few if any.
Bigger question. What moron carries collision coverage on a $1500 car?
“They just pass it on to their customers.”
What do you expect them to do. This is partially why insurance rates are high in some areas than others. Of course you know who the liberals blame.
There has to be a deductible. This would be comprehensive coverage so sometimes they have lower deductible.
“IDIOCRACY” was a documentary.”
This is NOT Idiocracy. It ‘s calculated.
“It doesn’t matter if the victim doesn’t want to pursue the case, idiot judge.”
The judge is NOT an idiot. He knows exactly what he’s doing.
Is that like a cotton-headed ninny muggins?
No, it’s more like ‘Nattering Nabobs of negativity’...............
Actually, the REAL victims of this crime will be the person or people this low IQ thieving ‘underserved person’ will kill next time she is out driving drunk in a stolen car.
Also... Multnomah county stopped publishing mugshots because it showed that so many violent crimes were committed by the tiny minority of melanated Portlanders and it was easy to identify the antifa goons the DA let off without charges.
There's this guy who was an entertaining wrestler in the 90s and 00s who's real name is Michael Higginbotham:
No one accused him of being a genius, either (but he played his cards right and is worth a few mil).
I worked with a Higginbotham and my wife went to school with a family of Higginbothams...............
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