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Posted on 07/12/2025 1:33:31 AM PDT by Lazamataz
This is (possibly, depending on the feedback I get) going to be the first chapter of the sequel for my first novel. This will be in the "Dimensions" universe. Critiques and reviews welcome!
Sprites
Sprites, they called them. Cute name for them, but they were very dangerous.
Martini adjusted his exosuit for an excursion onto the surface of Europa. This was the Jovian moon that had long fascinated Earth’s scientists. Those scientists were intrigued by the possibility of life under the kilometers of ice, in the oceans beneath.
Pedro Martini didn’t care about any of that. He was here to find rare earth deposits in the ice. That’s where the money was, and the corporation that sent him only cared about the money.
Mankind had been given access to teleporters by the Cephians, the extraterrestrial race that was a little under 1700 light years away. The primary use they put it to was to communicate with us, and to allow us access to the Galactic Communication Network that connected over 16,000 distinct sapient races across the Milky Way Galaxy.
These teleporters folded space along the fourth dimension, which allowed instant communications across those vast distances. The power requirement to send matter across folded space was very prohibitive at large distances – anything over a light year or so – but photons are massless. Communication between star systems was possible, but physical travel was not.
Mankind had discovered, however, that true teleportation over shorter distances was not only possible, but had a very low energy requirement. The conquest of the solar system had begun in earnest.
Martini punched the control panel that cycled the airlock with his clumsy gloves. The suit was mostly comfortable, but he hated the gloves. He always felt like he had thick sausage fingers when he was in this damned contraption. There was a sharp hiss as air escaped from the lock, but as the air escaped, the sound quieted quickly. Now all he could hear was his slow breath and the occasional ping sounds of life-support equipment noisily confirming their function.
He stepped onto the surface of the moon. He heard the ice and snow crystals crunch under his feet, vaguely reminding him of the sound he used to hear, as a child, when walking to school during the brutal winters of Upstate New York. Back then, it never failed to surprise him how something made out of water, frozen or not, could sound so dry.
“Clovis Twelve, Expedition Gamma. Beginning survey of Zone 18,” he said into his exosuit microphone.
“Copy that,” crackled the response. “Let me know if you need anything.”
The Clovis Twelve base housed the teleporter portal and the support equipment sent from Earth eighteen months ago. Clovis Twelve was located at one of the two thin-ice locations on Europa. Most of the ice on Europa was kilometers in depth; however, this patch was less than one kilometer thick. It was a good place to drill and look for the valuable rare-earth metals.
He hefted the drill equipment off the side of the exploration vehicle. In the low gravity, it was more a matter of clumsiness than it was the weight. He accidentally banged one of the pieces of equipment against his leg. “Shit!” he exclaimed, alarmed. He listened for the telltale hiss of escaping oxygen, but hearing none, he continued gathering the components of the laser-drill. That was lucky. He needed to be more careful. This would be a miserable place to die.
When humanity set up the first base on Europa, they discovered that Europa fairly teemed with a bizarre menagerie of life forms. Most of them were single-cell organisms, based on biochemistry completely alien to those found on Earth. There were larger life forms in thousands of configurations, too. They mostly congregated around the various hot spots in the oceans, but even away from the heated vents, the waters were full of life. The most deadly were the Sprites. These worm-like creatures, which could reach lengths up to eight meters long, were all teeth and body. If you were to compare them to an Earth-based life form. they were most analogous to Earth’s sharks. They had no eyes, but were able to locate prey by using their acute hearing. They were deadly, and they could burrow through the ice with ease, almost as easily as swimming through water.
Martini finished setting up the laser drill and activated it. It began melting the ice, the water sublimating into a gas that escaped into the vacuum. The laser quickly cut through the surface of the moon, and when water began to spew from the hole, he turned down the drill to a power level that would keep the drill hole from freezing again. He collected a sample of the water and put it into the device that would determine the concentration of rare-Earth metals. The device’s display flashed a set of numbers in green, indicating a large amount was present.
“Clovis Twelve, Expedition Gamma. I can report a score. Heavy concentrations here.”
“Roger that. Mark the location and return to base,” the operator on the other side responded.
He placed a radio beacon near the drill site and began dismantling the drill when movement under the ice caught the corner of his eye. Shit, he hoped it wasn’t a Sprite.
He picked up his pace, hoping to get back into the protection of his exploration vehicle as quickly as possible. He saw two more flashes of fleeting movement. Definitely Sprites. Dammit. He considered abandoning the drill machinery and coming back later to retrieve it. He was about to report the presence of Sprites to his home base, opening the channel, but never had the chance to report. He turned just in time to see the larger of the two Sprites leap out of the ice, the ring of teeth coming up to meet his visor. He managed to utter a single syllable, “Fuu…” before his helmet cracked open.
“Expedition Gamma, Clovis Twelve. Report in, please.”
Static.
“Expedition Gamma, Clovis Twelve. Please check in.”
Static.
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This is possibly going to be the first chapter of my sequel novel. Feedback and reviews welcome!
Engaging story Laz. Good luck with it.
This book may be sci-fi, but it is humans, and specifically our frailty, that take center stage. Fear, greed, misunderstanding, and especially miscalculation dog the steps of all the players, good and bad. And these emotions and failings are apparent on every human level, from international and geopolitical, to cabinet meetings, and particularly the interpersonal level.
All this human element makes this book supremely and wonderfully unpredictable. All the plans and the plotting and the grandest schemes on even the global and national scales, can fall completely to pieces for the smallest of reasons, like one cautious woman engaging in some CYA. “The best laid plans of mice and men,” are often nothing in the face of a world populated by individuals, by unpredictable humans.
The science and the machines in this book are riveting and one can see Tom Clancy in heaven, nodding his approval. The dissection of the physics and energy calculations surrounding star travel are especially impressive, and lead to one of the best lines in the book, “I guess all the science-fiction writers got it wrong.”
The surprise ending, like so much great writing, is an uplifting message of hope and love. Because in the end, we are not alone, and there is much more to us than the selfish, the petty, and the unthinking.
This book is a true page-turner—gripping from start to finish. It blends elements of science fiction, political intrigue, and spiritual reflection, creating a multi-layered narrative that keeps the reader constantly guessing. The plot delves into a wide range of themes, including UFOs and aliens, covert government operations, the chaos of war, and deeper questions surrounding spirituality and the human condition.
What makes this story so compelling is not just the suspense or action, but the thought-provoking way it challenges the reader to consider humanity’s place in the universe. The pacing is sharp, the characters are well-developed, and the twists are genuinely surprising without feeling forced.
Whether you're a fan of speculative fiction, thrillers, or philosophical sci-fi, this book offers a little something for everyone. I highly recommend setting aside time to dive into it—you won’t want to put it down.
My compliments. It is lean, effective story-telling in classic science fiction style.
Thank you! That is high praise indeed!
Bkmrk
Let me know what you think!
Laz, good luck! My first novel is now in the hands of copy editors and should be up soon, too. I know the kind of toil it takes to produce a really good novel. People have no idea the blood, swear, and tears!
When humanity set up the first base on Europa, they discovered that Europa fairly teemed with a bizarre menagerie of life forms. Most of them were single-cell organisms, based on biochemistry completely alien to those found on Earth. There were larger life forms in thousands of configurations, too. They mostly congregated around the various hot spots in the oceans, but even away from the heated vents, the waters were full of life. The most deadly were the Sprites.
These worm-like creatures, which could reach lengths up to eight meters long, were all teeth and body. If you were to compare them to an Earth-based life form. they were most analogous to Earth’s sharks. They had no eyes, but were able to locate prey by using their acute hearing. They were deadly, and they could burrow through the ice with ease, almost as easily as swimming through water.
Nice work! Is the Writer’s Guild new? First time I’ve seen it. Thx.
OUTSTANDING Laz! Has me on the edge of my seat. (LOL sausage fingers)
Congratulations, Laz. Sounds terrific! Please include me on the ping list.
Big SciFi fan,
You are added!
I almost didn’t read this sample because I knew it would be a cliffhanger. But of course, I did, and now must wait for the work to be completed. Please keep it going!!!!
Are you self-publishing? I am!
My first novel is now in the hands of copy editors and should be up soon, too.
I didn't use an editor. It seems I have enough writing skill that I could serve as an editor for others. 😊
I know the kind of toil it takes to produce a really good novel. People have no idea the blood, swear, and tears!
For me, at least, it involves almost no effort. I sit down, imagine the characters, and they take on a life of their own. In my first novel, I had a plotline sketched out, but the characters decided things were going to unfold differently. It was quite breathtaking.
nice, but if sprites were a known entity, would martini have more of a defense protocol?
i do like the descriptive nature of your work. to the point.
t
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