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Terminally-Ill Man Estranged From Daughters for 20 years now hopes to Find Them to Seek Their Forgiveness
AsiaOne ^ | August 10, 2024 | Candice Cai

Posted on 08/11/2024 1:18:19 PM PDT by nickcarraway

A 69-year-old man's final wish is to reunite with his two estranged daughters whom he has not seen in more than 20 years and seek their forgiveness.

Retired businessman Chen Tuguang (transliteration), is suffering from terminal pancreatic cancer, Shin Min Daily News reported.

In an interview with the Chinese evening daily, he shared that his wife had died of liver cancer in 1993, leaving behind his daughters aged 11 and eight.

Deciding to "leave this sad place", Chen packed his bags for Shanghai, China where he worked for several years.

He got married to a Chinese woman there and later brought her to Singapore.

However, his daughters did not get along with their step-mother and they often quarrelled about money, said Chen.

"One day in 2003, my elder daughter took her sister and left. I never saw them again."

He stated that he'd tried to search for them but was unsuccessful.

"Now that I'm seriously ill, I only hope they can let go of the past and forgive me," said Chen.

"I hope to see them one last time before I go, that's my only wish," he added, sharing that his daughters would now be aged 42 and 39.

His friend, Chen Meiru, 58, who's helping him in the search, told Shin Min that Chen is suffering from end-stage pancreatic cancer and that the cancer cells had spread.

He was given the diagnosis in April, after Chen found blood in his stool.

"Doctors had said it was incurable, but he had a strong will to live and went through chemotherapy but it was unsuccessful," said Meiru.

To aid his friend in fulfilling his final wish, Meiru also appealed to funeral director Roland Tay to help find Chen's daughters.

"He doesn't have that many days left and time is of the essence," said Meiru.

According to Shin Min Daily News who visited Chen at his home, the latter looked thin and frail, and needed someone to assist him when walking.

His discomfort was also plain to see as he laid his head down during the interview, his voice soft and weak, Shin Min reported.

Chen managed to pull out old family photos from 30 years ago, which showed him hugging his daughters.

Said Meiru: "He cries every day as he's very worried that he won't be able to see his daughters."

Despite his poor health, Chen penned down his remorse in a 200-word letter written on Aug 5, which detailed his regrets, Shin Min reported.

He expressed hope for his ashes to be placed alongside those of his ancestors, mother and wife so it'll be convenient for his daughters to pay their respects.


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Education; Health/Medicine
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1 posted on 08/11/2024 1:18:19 PM PDT by nickcarraway
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To: nickcarraway

The guy sounds like he did them wrong. I would not be optimistic about a reunion. Real life ain’t a Hallmark movie.


2 posted on 08/11/2024 1:28:08 PM PDT by Vermont Lt (Don’t vote for anyone over 70 years old. Get rid of the geriatric politicians.)
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To: Vermont Lt

Unless he was rich.


3 posted on 08/11/2024 1:33:04 PM PDT by TribalPrincess2U (Bye done!)
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To: nickcarraway
You leave your kids do not be surprised when they leave you.

Hopefully the ladies have made their peace with his actions and have forgiven him long ago.

Because that is a heavy load to carry.

4 posted on 08/11/2024 1:37:07 PM PDT by Harmless Teddy Bear ( Roses are red, Violets are blue, I love being on the government watch list, along with all of you.)
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To: Vermont Lt

Yeah, women are not very forgiving. It’s freaking evil, but that’s how they are. More important to some people like that to show how hard they are going to be able to fly to compassion to a dying man. Basically he got remarried, and his daughters were worried that the money was going towards his wife.


5 posted on 08/11/2024 1:38:23 PM PDT by DesertRhino (2016 Star Wars, 2020 The Empire Strikes Back, 2024... RETURN OF THE JEDI. )
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To: Vermont Lt

“The guy sounds like he did them wrong.”

I took it to mean that he brought someone (step mother) into the home which changed the family dynamics. That may have been how he “did them wrong”. Wicked stepmothers aren’t just in fairy tales; some are real life.


6 posted on 08/11/2024 1:39:09 PM PDT by MayflowerMadam (Bannon didn't kill himself.)
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To: nickcarraway

The daughters ran away when they were 11 and 8? He searched for them but “couldn’t find them?”

How does he know they weren’t snatched off the streets soon after? How does he know they’re even alive? If they simply disappeared, never to be seen again, were he and his second wife ever questioned by the authorities about it?


7 posted on 08/11/2024 1:48:16 PM PDT by BradyLS (DO NOT FEED THE BEARS!)
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To: BradyLS

The story as excerpted here doesn’t add up, IMO.


8 posted on 08/11/2024 1:51:15 PM PDT by BradyLS (DO NOT FEED THE BEARS!)
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To: BradyLS

…And what happened to wife #2? She’s not mentioned past the fight that drove the daughters away.


9 posted on 08/11/2024 2:01:45 PM PDT by BradyLS (DO NOT FEED THE BEARS!)
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To: BradyLS
As laid out in the story, when his daughters were eleven and eight their mother died. Rather then sticking around he did a flit to another country for several years. No indications of what arrangements he made for his daughters. After several years in another country he comes back with a new wife and expects his daughters to join him in playing "Happy Families". They were not so inclined. When they were 21 and 18, ten years after their mother died they moved out and he has not seen them since.
10 posted on 08/11/2024 2:23:50 PM PDT by Harmless Teddy Bear ( Roses are red, Violets are blue, I love being on the government watch list, along with all of you.)
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To: Harmless Teddy Bear

Thank you for working it out for me. They left as young adults then. I get it now.


11 posted on 08/11/2024 2:34:01 PM PDT by BradyLS (DO NOT FEED THE BEARS!)
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To: BradyLS

It could have been written better.


12 posted on 08/11/2024 2:49:23 PM PDT by Harmless Teddy Bear ( Roses are red, Violets are blue, I love being on the government watch list, along with all of you.)
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To: BradyLS

No, they left when one daughter was 18 and the other was 21, allegedly because they didn’t get along with the stepmother.


13 posted on 08/11/2024 2:56:22 PM PDT by nickcarraway
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To: nickcarraway; Harmless Teddy Bear

My thanks for pointing that out. Harmless Teddy Bear squared me away, too.


14 posted on 08/11/2024 3:01:09 PM PDT by BradyLS (DO NOT FEED THE BEARS!)
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To: Harmless Teddy Bear

Can’t say as I blame them.

It’s not the new wife. It’s HIM. Abandoning them.


15 posted on 08/11/2024 3:21:11 PM PDT by metmom (He who testifies to these things says, “Surely I am coming soon.” Amen. Come, Lord Jesus”)
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To: Vermont Lt
The guy sounds like he did them wrong.

his daughters did not get along with their step-mother and they often quarrelled about money

>More like the ungrateful children thought HE did them wrong......

16 posted on 08/11/2024 3:26:02 PM PDT by Hot Tabasco
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To: nickcarraway

” I only hope they can let go of the past and forgive me,”

What an ego on this guy.


17 posted on 08/11/2024 4:20:33 PM PDT by Organic Panic (Democrats. Memories as short as Joe Biden's eyes)
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To: Hot Tabasco

Sounds like three oriental women arguing about money to me. Compassion for a man dying of cancer, reflecting on his life, asking for forgiveness? sheesh, not likely.

He should’ve said something about a big inheritance and that he’s trying to locate them. He would’ve got his two daughters back, probably a couple of extras.


18 posted on 08/11/2024 4:23:33 PM PDT by DesertRhino (2016 Star Wars, 2020 The Empire Strikes Back, 2024... RETURN OF THE JEDI. )
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To: Organic Panic

Yeah, a dying man asked for forgiveness. Clearly an egomaniac. I think that’s how Jesus would see it also. “Verily I say until you. When a dying father wants forgiveness, withhold it. Ruminate on somebody’s wrongs from many years ago. Hold the hate inside your heart, use it to hurt people all you can”.

Book of Grudges 3:16


19 posted on 08/11/2024 4:28:22 PM PDT by DesertRhino (2016 Star Wars, 2020 The Empire Strikes Back, 2024... RETURN OF THE JEDI. )
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To: metmom
Yep.

Let's assume he was gone for only three years.

That is a long time choose to leave your grieving daughters after the loss of their mother to what was probably a prolonged and painful illness.

Then just when they had adjusted to life without him he pops back up with a "replacement" mom and proceeds to tear up what stability they had regained.

Out of all the things kids need one of the greatest is stability. They need to know that tomorrow will be somewhat the same as today. Even when they go on a vacation to some place and enjoy it after a few days they are ready to go back home.

And at that age a "Few years" is an eternity.

20 posted on 08/11/2024 4:29:08 PM PDT by Harmless Teddy Bear ( Roses are red, Violets are blue, I love being on the government watch list, along with all of you.)
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