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Proof young women are opting out of casual sex?
The Spectator ^ | 05/29/2024 | Amber Duke

Posted on 05/29/2024 8:36:35 PM PDT by SeekAndFind

The popular dating app Bumble was forced to apologize recently when its anti-celibacy advertisement didn’t land the way that it had hoped. Bumble tried to tap into many women’s frustration with modern dating, telling women who are having trouble finding a significant other that “a vow of celibacy is not the answer.” But whoever is on Bumble’s marketing team failed to realize that many women are opting out of casual sex and hook-ups as they realize they prefer settling into a long-term partnership before they engage in a sexual relationship. Others are taking a break from dating…

The popular dating app Bumble was forced to apologize recently when its anti-celibacy advertisement didn’t land the way that it had hoped.

Bumble tried to tap into many women’s frustration with modern dating, telling women who are having trouble finding a significant other that “a vow of celibacy is not the answer.”

But whoever is on Bumble’s marketing team failed to realize that many women are opting out of casual sex and hook-ups as they realize they prefer settling into a long-term partnership before they engage in a sexual relationship. Others are taking a break from dating entirely, as they feel a deep dissatisfaction with the current landscape, which seems centered around fleeting physical attraction and short-lived connections. On TikTok, the #celibacy hashtag has had more than 195 million views and Google searches for “celibacy” were up 90 percent in January 2023.

Women let Bumble know that they did not appreciate the ads, which seemed designed to shame them for their choice to save their bodies for someone special. Bumble apologized in turn. “We made a mistake,” the company said. “Our ads referencing celibacy were an attempt to lean into a community frustrated by modern dating, and instead of bringing joy and humor, we unintentionally did the opposite.”

Some Gen-Z TikTokkers refer to the trend as going “boy sober,” and the reasons why young women are swearing off the hard stuff (apologies) are numerous. Liberal and progressive women argue that it would be irresponsible for them to engage in meaningless hook-ups when abortion restrictions and bans have made the stakes of an unwanted pregnancy much higher. (Ironically, this is exactly what pro-life activists have long encouraged women to do; practice safe sex or abstain to avoid getting pregnant in the first place, rather than terminating an unwanted pregnancy after the fact).

Other women acknowledged that they choose celibacy because they do not believe it’s empowering to give up sex to a man who does not meet some bare minimum standards. There is an important acknowledgment here that having sex with men who don’t treat you right or who don’t actually want to commit to you only engenders their bad behavior and incentivizes it. As the old saying goes, why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?

The backlash to Bumble’s ad doesn’t change the fact that a lot of young women are still having casual sex. The American Psychological Association found that 70 percent of sexually active 12-21 year olds reported having a casual sexual encounter in the past year. What is different, though, is that young women are starting to associate their dissatisfaction with the dating scene and negative feelings about themselves with their choice to engage in hook-up culture. According to the Institute for Family Studies, “an APA survey of 1,468 undergraduate students found that 82.6 percent reported negative mental and emotional consequences after hook-ups, including embarrassment, loss of respect and difficulties with maintaining steady relationships.” Similarly, 78 percent of women and 72 percent who engaged in uncommitted sex acts experienced regret over their actions. The Journal of Sex Research says engaging in hook-ups and the number of hook-ups are correlated with rises in depression and anxiety, which are reaching crisis levels in young people.

Louise Perry, author of The Case Against the Sexual Revolution told the Guardian that many young heterosexual women “now feel as if they have to run the gauntlet of hook-up culture if they want to have any kind of sexual relationship. I think a lot of them, quite fairly, would rather not have any sexual relationship at all.”

Women no longer buy the feminist lie that casual sex is “empowering” or gives them some special kind of agency over their own body. They are able to differentiate between “intimacy” and “sex.” And they don’t want to be with men who only desire them for what they can offer physically.

Of course, the rise of celibacy among young people is not all good. It is certainly better from a mental and physical health perspective to avoid unsatisfying sexual encounters that lack any real long-term connection. But some researchers believe the decline in young people having sex can be attributed to things like video games, social media and pornography. So while some people are choosing be voluntarily celibate, others are not having sex because they are simply unable to make real personal connections in a world gone digital. This comes with its own set of negative consequences for mental health and family formation. Young people are getting married later and later and many don’t expect to marry or have children at all. The US birth rate has cratered. None of this bodes well for society, which thrives on healthy and robust family structures.

So, what’s the answer to this problem illuminated by Bumble’s unfortunate anti-celibacy ad? Young women are right to lay off casual sex until they find the right man, but they shouldn’t give up on love entirely. Statistically, the happiest group of women are married mothers. That’s something worth staying in the game for.



TOPICS: Society
KEYWORDS: casualsex; dating; fornication; mansophere; mgtow; pua; redpill; relax; socialmedia; women; youngwomen
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To: SeekAndFind

““a vow of celibacy is not the answer.””

Why not?


21 posted on 05/29/2024 10:17:15 PM PDT by Organic Panic (Democrats. Memories as short as Joe Biden's eyes.)
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To: metmom

I agree. And I have never believed casual sex was good for men anymore than women.


22 posted on 05/29/2024 10:18:24 PM PDT by Georgia Girl 2 (The only purpose of a pistol is to fight your way back to the rifle you should never have dropped)
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To: SeekAndFind
So while some people women, who own all the sexual power / are "gate-keepers" of sex are choosing be voluntarily celibate, others men are not having sex because they are simply unable to make real personal connections in a world gone digital.

One should always differentiate by gender when making these statements!

Regards,

23 posted on 05/29/2024 10:43:57 PM PDT by alexander_busek (Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence.)
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To: metmom
no man wants to settle down with the town bicycle.

metmom: Women don't like it in men, either.

Yeah, women want a really pure man - preferably a virgin.

Meanwhile, back on planet Earth, women want the dynamic, socially confident, physically attractive go-getters willing and able to invest the time and energy necessary to land multiple bed-partners.

To be a male "town bicycle" requires lots of effort and "game" and is hence a signifier of / placeholder for high value.

For a woman, however, it requires no effort. A simple announcement at closing time at the local bar will suffice.

Regards,

24 posted on 05/29/2024 10:48:50 PM PDT by alexander_busek (Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence.)
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To: metmom

Women are the gatekeepers of sex not men. Fact is 90 % of women only sleep with 10% of the men who are considered top tier. They also go for the bad boy thugs .


25 posted on 05/29/2024 10:52:29 PM PDT by gawatchman
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To: Jonty30; metmom
Men do not care as much about a woman’s ability to provide, but how exclusive she can be with him. Women care more about a man’s ability to provide than whether he can be lifelong exclusive to her. [...] if a man isn’t highly experienced by the time he’s in his twenties women don’t want him.

Finally, a voice of reason! Statements based upon a real-world assessment of fundamental biological realities.

Regards,

26 posted on 05/29/2024 10:52:38 PM PDT by alexander_busek (Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence.)
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To: imabadboy99

I heard that

I was pretty attracted to one young lady

She ... just ... couldn’t ... stop ... the ... game ...

Actually a couple like that. It was sad.


27 posted on 05/29/2024 11:13:30 PM PDT by SaveFerris (Luke 17:28 ... as it was in the Days of Lot; They did Eat, They Drank, They Bought, They Sold ......)
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To: HIDEK6

The tattoos and nose rings do not help at all


28 posted on 05/29/2024 11:14:49 PM PDT by SaveFerris (Luke 17:28 ... as it was in the Days of Lot; They did Eat, They Drank, They Bought, They Sold ......)
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To: willk

[tattooed and wearing nose rings.]

I’m glad somebody also said it.


29 posted on 05/29/2024 11:16:33 PM PDT by SaveFerris (Luke 17:28 ... as it was in the Days of Lot; They did Eat, They Drank, They Bought, They Sold ......)
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To: SaveFerris

>>[tattooed and wearing nose rings<<

True maneater.


30 posted on 05/29/2024 11:34:50 PM PDT by 353FMG
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To: SaveFerris

>>[tattooed and wearing nose rings<<

Sign of a maneater.


31 posted on 05/29/2024 11:36:29 PM PDT by 353FMG
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To: Georgia Girl 2

In World war Two, many young American girls elected to support the war effort for patriotic reasons by becoming “Victory Girls” and sleeping with any many in a uniform. Some did have preferences, like sailors, soldiers, airmen, marines etc... The rational was no American boy should go into combat a virgin and their job was to see that didn’t happen. They were called “Patriotutes” and they did raise moral but spread VD. They would give out for the price of a movie or a hamburger. My Aunt was one such “Patriot”—when having a fling in a hotel room, a Marine going out to the Pacific to the war, tried to pay her, she threw the money at him—telling him she was no whore. He ask what he could do for her and she thought hard and told him this: “When you get out there, kill a Jap for me.” he said OK.


32 posted on 05/29/2024 11:57:48 PM PDT by Forward the Light Brigade (. War is Hell)
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To: Georgia Girl 2

In World war Two, many young American girls elected to support the war effort for patriotic reasons by becoming “Victory Girls” and sleeping with any many in a uniform. Some did have preferences, like sailors, soldiers, airmen, marines etc... The rational was no American boy should go into combat a virgin and their job was to see that didn’t happen. They were called “Patriotutes” and they did raise moral but spread VD. They would give out for the price of a movie or a hamburger. My Aunt was one such “Patriot”—when having a fling in a hotel room, with a young Marine going out to the Pacific to the war, he tried to pay her, she threw the money at him—telling him she was no whore. He ask what he could do for her and she thought hard and told him this: “When you get out there, kill a Jap for me.” he said OK. In this way she saw her actions as helping the USA in the war.


33 posted on 05/29/2024 11:59:53 PM PDT by Forward the Light Brigade (. War is Hell)
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To: metmom

The Big War will change all this quick. After the conflict—a wedding boom and then a baby boom—common after a war.


34 posted on 05/30/2024 12:02:07 AM PDT by Forward the Light Brigade (. War is Hell)
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To: 353FMG; willk

[fat, tattooed and wearing nose rings]

An accurate description of one young lady that I know.
All three of those though she’s not-too-terribly overweight.

Plus she’s got a ‘tude, too.

Though sometimes one can converse with her a bit, there is ___something___ there. Add it all up - it’s definitely a no-go for any guy and I think 353 also nailed it.

[Sign of a maneater.]

yep


35 posted on 05/30/2024 12:02:52 AM PDT by SaveFerris (Luke 17:28 ... as it was in the Days of Lot; They did Eat, They Drank, They Bought, They Sold ......)
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To: Jonty30

Well, you certainly can watch these hoochies all day long on YT with their 100+ body counts, wild 6-7 figure BF salary expectations, and an attitude that the man has to pay for EVERYTHING (including the current baby where the baby daddy is out of the picture).

It’s really wild out there, especially out in public where a lot of partying and drinking is going on. There’s women out there who expect the man to pay for exorbitant meals AND take home for her kids ON THE FIRST DATE.

But most of them eventually succumb to age and the last resort is marriage with some poor schmuck who gets the used bicycle with bald tires and the pedals missing. In the end, the juice just ain’t worth the squeeze.

There ARE decent young women out there, but unfortunately they’re not where most young men seem to gravitate.


36 posted on 05/30/2024 12:09:44 AM PDT by Gaffer
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To: Gaffer

Where are they? Asking for a friend.


37 posted on 05/30/2024 1:01:09 AM PDT by JohnnyP (Thinking is hard work (I stole that from Rush).)
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To: SeekAndFind

There is also a male version of aversion to dating women who bring nothing to the table. Men Going Their Own Way is the usual name for it [MGTOW]. Its pretty astounding to hear some of these women brag about bedding hundreds of men then wondering where da good men at?

Hopefully, the trends of rejecting hookups and meaningless dating drivel can continue by both sexes and some rebalancing can happen.
But both sides have a lot to unlearn like that men are wallets and for men, that women are not just bed meat.

Wonder if there’s some sort of code or manual that teaches that stuff?


38 posted on 05/30/2024 2:54:21 AM PDT by Adder (End fascism...defeat all Democrats.)
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To: SeekAndFind

I may not be the best parent in the world but my girls are both girly girls. Both are still virgins, so they tell my wife. This is saying a lot since they’re attractive young women. My hope is they wait until they meet a well adjusted man to settle down with. My oldest is in her second year of college and she has had one somewhat boyfriend. Most of the boys are not mature enough and I think my girls see that. Here’s to hoping they find real men to date and not some soy boy that won’t be able to provide for them. Yea call me old fashioned.


39 posted on 05/30/2024 3:16:47 AM PDT by TermLimits4All ("If you stand for nothing, you'll fall for anything.")
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To: Newbomb Turk

Prenup, prenup, prenup.


40 posted on 05/30/2024 3:28:54 AM PDT by Rockingham
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