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My Daughter Let It Slip That She Expects Me to Buy Her a House. What?
Slate ^ | March 20, 2024 | Kristin Wong [advice columnist]

Posted on 03/20/2024 3:20:25 PM PDT by grundle

Dear Pay Dirt,

I love my husband but he comes from a very wealthy family, whereas I raised my kids on a modest salary as a single mom. I had to sign a prenup when we got married and even if he dies before me, I will not be inheriting millions. He has been very generous with my two adult children, taking them on expensive vacations and such.

This I why my daughter’s behavior is such a shock. She, her husband, and their two girls live in a very expensive area and rent. They refuse to consider relocating based on their political opinions. My daughter called me to complain yet again about her living situation and then proceeded to berate me for not convincing my husband to go ahead already and buy her a house. She was “sick” of how we were flaunting our lifestyle in her face and said I needed to do more as her mother. We haven’t really spoken since and the thought of having this conversation makes me physically ill. I worked two jobs to give my children the best start in life. They graduated with no college debt and I was able to help pay for both of their weddings (this was before I met my husband). I haven’t spoken to my husband about my daughter’s demands because I know it will sour their relationship. What do I do here?

(Excerpt) Read more at yahoo.com ...


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To: DesertRhino

Ah, yes. I see, belatedly. You’re right.


61 posted on 03/20/2024 5:01:11 PM PDT by 9YearLurker
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To: Buttons12

Your second scenario sounds like Paulie and Adrian.


62 posted on 03/20/2024 5:03:02 PM PDT by JZelle
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To: grundle

Kristin, tell your daughter she’s wong.


63 posted on 03/20/2024 5:13:17 PM PDT by Disambiguator
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To: grundle

The comments on Yahoo are surprisingly conservative. Most seem to be “Tell your daughter to Bugger Off!”


64 posted on 03/20/2024 5:16:09 PM PDT by Mr Rogers (We're a nation of feelings, not thoughts.)
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To: DesertRhino

So true.
My dad knew, from childhood, a true “bad seed.” Total psychopath, bordering on demonic. Dad and everyone else was warned in the second grade, to watch out for this character. The guy was smart enough to stay out of prison but his crimes were legion. He married one time, raised one kid.
That kid, now in his 50’s, has never been in trouble, has a happy, satisfying marriage, family and social life; everyone who ever knew his dad thinks this outcome is a miracle.
And the bad seed’s parents — you guessed it, great people. There are no guarantees.


65 posted on 03/20/2024 5:16:14 PM PDT by Buttons12 ( )
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To: grundle
She, her husband

She stopped being the author's responsibility when she was given away at the wedding.

66 posted on 03/20/2024 5:18:10 PM PDT by Brass Lamp
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To: McGavin999

Great answer. Daughter needs to count her lessons and live within her means.


67 posted on 03/20/2024 5:23:09 PM PDT by BradyLS (DO NOT FEED THE BEARS!)
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To: JZelle

I’ve known them some 20 years, since I was a child. He was always saying his half-sister had “the mind of a child.” I’m convinced he wants her to have the mind of a child. For pete’s sake, she can read, write and do math better than most of the public high school seniors in the county, according to the proficiency scores. She can drive a car, and babysit kids and care for his pets; only too dumb to go out on a date?
In a way it reminds me of “Barretts of Wimpole Street.” Elizabeth’s father telling her she was an invalid.


68 posted on 03/20/2024 5:26:13 PM PDT by Buttons12 ( )
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To: grundle

poster child for “no good deed goes unpunished”. learn to say NO! and follow through. wifey had her own house before we got married. 2 ADULT(over 40)children, 2 GRAND sons(over 18), and her brother(almost 60 at the time)lived with her in her house.we married and she moved into my house. out of three bedrooms she has her own office, I have my own studio and we have our master bedroom. she sold her house, the clan had no where to go so started trying to finagle a way into our house(My house”). now wifey has the perfect guilt-free excuse when they try...”Hubby says NO!”. she’s off the family hook and now that they know me, they don’t try me. tough love is designed to Force people,and particularly your adult Children, to GROW UP! definitely not for the weak but keep in mind “Only the Weak apologize to the Petulant”.


69 posted on 03/20/2024 5:28:27 PM PDT by Qwapisking ("IF the Second goes first the First goes second" L.Star )
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To: BradyLS

s/b “...count her blessings...”


70 posted on 03/20/2024 5:30:37 PM PDT by BradyLS (DO NOT FEED THE BEARS!)
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To: EEGator; drwoof

Single parent can mean never married, divorced or surviving spouse. It really doesn’t matter what her marriage status was, her children could see that she worked two jobs in order to take care of them. She did her job and her new husband owes them nothing. Does the daughter not know about the pre-nup? That’s a pretty big hint that she shouldn’t expect a house from her stepfather.


71 posted on 03/20/2024 5:30:56 PM PDT by skr (Righteousness exalteth a nation: sin is a reproach to any people. - Proverbs 14:34)
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To: Secret Agent Man

not necessarily from mommy. college peer pressure and indoctrination can easily re-trained your children into people you don’t recognize. seems dogs have it right with progeny...pop them out and go your separate ways. once they’re weaned there’s no responsibility or guilt over how they turn out. in other words if your children suck, walk away and let them. do it for YOUR peace of mind.you won’t change them.


72 posted on 03/20/2024 5:42:30 PM PDT by Qwapisking ("IF the Second goes first the First goes second" L.Star )
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To: Buttons12

Yes.

Second and third child saw what happened with the first. My sister and brother also saw it. Everyone was outraged by their behavior.

My husband, our two other children, and I are moving to joint land with my sister and her family.

Since COVID wrecked me, I in my declining years now. Moving my family to our final home is part of my end stage preparations.


73 posted on 03/20/2024 5:45:35 PM PDT by TheWriterTX (🇺🇸✝️🙏🇮🇱)
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To: skr

Maybe that’s the real reason for the pre-nup. Loved the wife and found her worthy. Liked the kids well enough but understood them better.


74 posted on 03/20/2024 5:45:58 PM PDT by BradyLS (DO NOT FEED THE BEARS!)
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To: skr

Agreed. Didn’t intend to disparage anyone, but kinda did. Just a little hard-hearted, I suppose. Valid observation about her working to keep things afloat. Rough that her kids had to live through that. Likely led to her daughter having a big ‘ol void in her heart, and her seeking money to fill it.


75 posted on 03/20/2024 5:59:58 PM PDT by drwoof
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To: skr

I was just being counter argumentative to someone being argumentative.
I have no attachment to either side of this “news”.
I regret posting to it.


76 posted on 03/20/2024 6:02:01 PM PDT by EEGator
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To: Buttons12

That’s crazy but I don’t doubt it.


77 posted on 03/20/2024 6:03:12 PM PDT by JZelle
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To: grundle

“I had to sign a prenup when we got married”

No. You didn’t.


78 posted on 03/20/2024 6:08:09 PM PDT by unlearner (I, Robot: I think I finally understand why Dr. Lanning created me... ;-)
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To: grundle

“..if he dies before me, I will not be inheriting millions.”

And if you die first?


79 posted on 03/20/2024 6:23:56 PM PDT by PTBAA
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To: EEGator

She does not mention how she became single.


80 posted on 03/20/2024 6:30:53 PM PDT by lastchance (Cognovit Dominus qui sunt eius.)
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