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(Parody)You won't believe what's in Claudine Gay's resignation letter
glennbeck.com ^ | January 3, 2024 | Glenn Beck

Posted on 01/04/2024 5:26:58 AM PST by Heartlander

(Parody) Claudine Gay's resignation letter

Friends and Ivy League citizenships.

In all the decisions I've had to make in my academic life. I've always had to do what was best for Harvard.

Throughout the long and difficult period of these past few months. I felt it was my duty to preserve, to make every possible effort to complete the term of office, to which I was appointed.

In the past few days, however, it's become evident to me. I no longer have a strong enough pace in the academic community, to justify continuing that effort. I've never been a quitter. To leave office before my term is completed is abhorrent to every instinct in my body. But as president, I must put the interest of Harvard first.

However, I want to make one thing clear.

I'm not a crook.

I repeat, I did not have plagiaristic relations with that paper. Instead, I only had a dream.

A dream where Harvard students would one day live in a nation, where they would be judged by the color of their -- not by the color of their skin, but the content of their character.

But today is not that day. Instead, I've been subjected to personal attacks and threats fueled by racial animus. But when evil men plot, good men must plan.

When evil men burn and bomb, good men must build and bind. When evil men shout ugly words of hatred, good men must commit themselves to the glories of love. Because darkness cannot drive out darkness. Only light can do that.

Hate cannot drive out hate. Only love can do that. And it's during our darkest moments, that we must focus to see the light.

So let us hold the truths to be self-evident, that all university presidents are created equal. And they're endowed by their boards with certain unalienable rights.

Among these, are life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. But don't judge me by my success. Judge me by how many times I fell down and got back up again. Because life truly is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you will get. And at first, if you don't succeed. Try, try again. And, you know, the only thing we have to fear is fear itself.

And with these words, I'm resigning as President of Harvard. But don't cry for me, Argentina. Don't cry because it's over.

Smile because it happened. My tenure as Harvard's first black president was one small step for man, but a giant leap for mankind. When the two roads diverged in a wood, I took the one less traveled by. And that's made all the difference. So ask not what your university can do for you, ask what you can do for your university.

Because life moves pretty fast, and if you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it. So here's looking at you, kid. And, Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall.


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS:

1 posted on 01/04/2024 5:26:58 AM PST by Heartlander
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To: Heartlander

Want your blood pressure elevated 1st thing this morning?

She’ll still be making in the neighborhood of $900k A YEAR at harvard


2 posted on 01/04/2024 5:31:45 AM PST by V_TWIN (America...so great even the people that hate it refuse to leave!)
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To: Heartlander

I’m having deja vu all over again….


3 posted on 01/04/2024 5:33:06 AM PST by fishtank (The denial of original sin is the root of liberalism.)
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To: Heartlander

When she saw the fork in the road, she took it.


4 posted on 01/04/2024 5:33:57 AM PST by fishtank (The denial of original sin is the root of liberalism.)
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To: Heartlander

Parody…right?


5 posted on 01/04/2024 5:37:30 AM PST by silverleaf (“Inside Every Progressive Is A Totalitarian Screaming To Get Out” —David Horowitz)
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To: V_TWIN

We won’t have Claudine Gay to kick around any more.


6 posted on 01/04/2024 5:38:43 AM PST by OKSooner ("You won't like what comes after America." - Leonard Cohen.)
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To: Heartlander

As awful as it is, it is beyond her tiny brain. She copied it from someone else. Without quotes, of course.


7 posted on 01/04/2024 5:46:11 AM PST by Da Coyote
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To: Heartlander

Racism of course. And al the “civil rights” gurus like Shharptongue and Jerkson will be echoing that.


8 posted on 01/04/2024 5:53:14 AM PST by antidemoncrat
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To: Heartlander

You’re all just too white stupid to understand that opposing genocide is racist.


9 posted on 01/04/2024 5:55:33 AM PST by _longranger81
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To: silverleaf
Parody…right?

Was it the word "Parody" in the headline that gave it away?;-)

10 posted on 01/04/2024 6:01:58 AM PST by RoosterRedux (A person who seeks the truth with a strong bias will never find it. He will only confirm his bias.)
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To: Heartlander

I didn’t feel like reading her word salad, so did she blame racists?


11 posted on 01/04/2024 6:19:04 AM PST by Mark17 (Retired USAF air traffic controller. Father of USAF Captain & pilot. Both bitten by the aviation bug)
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To: OKSooner
We won’t have Claudine Gay to kick around any more.

Unfortunately, that's not the case.

See post 2

12 posted on 01/04/2024 6:33:03 AM PST by Gil4 (And the trees are all kept equal by hatchet, ax and saw)
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To: Heartlander

Did she plagiarize the letter, too??


13 posted on 01/04/2024 7:35:57 AM PST by SMARTY ("A lie which is half a truth is ever the blackest of lies." Tennyson)
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To: Heartlander

....and my country tis of thee, e pluribus unum, and God save the king.


14 posted on 01/04/2024 8:24:49 AM PST by nagant
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To: Heartlander

That’s funny.

Thanks for the laugh.


15 posted on 01/04/2024 7:22:04 PM PST by WeaslesRippedMyFlesh (Wake me up when somebody tells the truth.)
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