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New Mexico Criminals Excited To Hear No One Will Be Armed For Entire Month
Babylon Bee ^ | Sep 9, 2023 | Babylon Bee

Posted on 09/10/2023 11:30:07 AM PDT by george76

Criminals across New Mexico were ecstatic to hear from Governor Grisham today that no one in the state would be armed for an entire month.

"Oh, sweet!" said local carjacker Jeff Diggs. "It's so stressful wondering if your next victim could be packing. Gosh, that's such a weight off!"

New Mexico Governor Michelle Lujan Grisham made the announcement yesterday in a press conference, to resounding cheers from criminals across the state. "I just want every thief in our great state to know they have nothing to fear," said Governor Grisham. "We're delivering bold leadership on crime, and making a statement to the nation. That statement is this: For the next month, criminals in New Mexico can rob and assault anyone with absolute impunity."

Organized crime rings broke out in applause and slapped high-fives, ecstatic about the news. "Man, I'm getting tears in my eyes," said Albuquerque gangster Sean Rogers. "What a relief, knowing we're the only ones with the guns. This is going to be amazing."

At publishing time, Governor Grisham had announced to further cheers that she would also be taking away guns from the police.


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; banglist; criminals; grisham; lujan; lujangrisham; michellelujan; newmexico

1 posted on 09/10/2023 11:30:07 AM PDT by george76
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To: george76

crime increases
you disarm potential victims
crime goes up more

repeat


2 posted on 09/10/2023 11:31:13 AM PDT by joshua c (to disrupt the system, we must disrupt our lives, cut the cable tv)
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To: george76

Maybe they’re posting really big “No Guns Allowed” signs everywhere!!


3 posted on 09/10/2023 11:36:56 AM PDT by albie
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To: albie

Either we stop all the chaos created by democrats or the US will be fully communist very soon.


4 posted on 09/10/2023 11:54:48 AM PDT by joma89 (Buy weapons and ammo, folks, and have the will to use them.)
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To: joma89

It’s not just Communist. It’s becoming an open air insane asylum.


5 posted on 09/10/2023 12:07:26 PM PDT by sjmjax
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To: george76

Reminds me of those signs in front of many schools: Gun Free Zone. Might as well post invitations to disturbed students and criminals.


6 posted on 09/10/2023 12:24:44 PM PDT by Ronaldus Magnus III (Do, or do not, there is no try)
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To: george76

“said local carjacker Jeff Diggs“, and then “local gangster Sean Rogers?”

Crime in Albuquerque has almost solely Hispanic names. Just a fact.


7 posted on 09/10/2023 12:47:09 PM PDT by DesertRhino (Dogs are called man's best friend. Moslems hate dogs. Add it up..)
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To: All

Criminals across New Mexico were ecstatic to hear that
no one in the state would be armed for an entire month.

“Oh, sweet!” said local carjacker Jeff Diggs. “It’s so stressful wondering
if your next victim could be packing. Gosh, that’s such a weight off!”


8 posted on 09/10/2023 12:50:11 PM PDT by Liz
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To: george76

Cartels will know where to start home base now.


9 posted on 09/10/2023 1:12:48 PM PDT by Vaduz (....)
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To: george76

Hardly satire.


10 posted on 09/10/2023 1:46:03 PM PDT by metmom (He who testifies to these things says, “Surely I am coming soon.” Amen. Come, Lord Jesus.)
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To: george76

Has she thought of the Chicago solution? Pay the gang members not to shoot during the 30 day gun prohibition?


11 posted on 09/10/2023 2:57:34 PM PDT by RetiredTexasVet (Biden not only suffers fools and criminals, he appoints them to positions of responsibility. )
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To: george76

Open carry protest today

https://x.com/fordfischer/status/1700996328799773109?s=46


12 posted on 09/10/2023 5:30:05 PM PDT by aMorePerfectUnion (Fraud vitiates everything)
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