Wanted Illinois man seen terrorizing town arrested after being ran over by golf cart

My Stateline ^ | 21 June 2023 | Blake Dietz

[DUMBGRUNT]

Must see TV!

From out of the clear blue of the western sky comes Golfcart King!

[Islander7]

😂😂😂

[The FIGHTIN Illini]

Illinois Man trying to replace Florida Man for top billing of Stupidist Man😂

[joma89]

I do not see the word ‘died’ in the title so clearly not a good news story.

[RoosterRedux]

He was ran over? My English teacher tried to ran over me in her car once. She said she was angry about my poor gramma.

That was strange since she didn't even know my gramma.

[T.B. Yoits]

As John Correia from Active Self Protection would point out, this was a situation where people needed less-than-lethal protection such as pepper spray and “bless the deserving with the hot sauce”.

[Does so]

OK...runned over...

[DUMBGRUNT]

—”Illinois Man trying to replace Florida Man for top billing of Stupidist Man”

Most reports of Florida citizens show a bit of panache.

This Illinois jamoke has nothing.

The Golfcart King was clearly on top of the subject, perhaps he was visiting from Florida?

[cdcdawg]

Headline of the Week contender. How is this “Illinois Man” instead of Floridaman?

[DUMBGRUNT]

—”I do not see the word ‘died’ in the title so clearly not a good news story.”

If you want to donate all of your earthly passions and probably your freedom to some jamoke breaking windows; give it a shot.

[bert]

He should have known that he might get run over if not wearing a safety green shirt like the driver

[coloradan]

Questions not answered in the article: What was he wanted for? Did he have a past criminal record? What was his motive? How long has he been on the run?

[DUMBGRUNT]

—”this was a situation where people needed less-than-lethal protection...”

Clearly a good application of some non-lethal blunt trauma.

Just like a beanbag shot, but different.

[E. Pluribus Unum]

I bet that hurt.

[Real Cynic No More]

What is it with all the poor grammar these days? "... was ran over....?" Such incorrect verbiage turns me off, making me wonder what real effort went into researching the topic prior to writing the article.

[alexander_busek]

Wanted Illinois man seen terrorizing town arrested after being ran run over by golf cart

Journalists nowadays! Illiterate!

Regards,

[VTenigma]

Nope, run dover.

[DUMBGRUNT]

—”What is it with all the poor grammar these days?”

A small market TV station that pays zip.

Good editors cost money. And anyone that writes needs one.

Perhaps you are looking?
Many openings.

https://nexstar.wd5.myworkdayjobs.com/nexstar/7/refreshFacet/318c8bb6f553100021d223d9780d30be

[DUMBGRUNT]

—”Nope, run dover.”

Here in Illinois, that would be acceptable south of I80.

...And Moline is right on that line.

[Lurker]

Back when Mrs L was a banquet manager at a local golf course she was running a wedding. One of the groomsmen decided to get completely drunk and take a beverage cart out for a spin. He crashed it into a sand trap. Not content with that he returned to the cart barn and took off in a golf cart smashing that into a tree.

He then returned to the cart barn and attempted to take another cart for a ride but the garage door was closed blocking the exit. So he did what anyone else would do. He rammed that golf cart into the door a few times before giving up and, because why not, headed for the dance floor.

That’s where the cops found him when they arrested him on 3 counts of DUI and criminal damage.

The father of the bride, he’d signed the contract, got a bill for around $45,000 in damage.

L