Posted on 03/03/2023 9:15:32 AM PST by Red Badger
The National Park Service's official Twitter account warned park visitors to not push their slower friends down in a bear encounter. Photo courtesy of the National Park Service
March 2 (UPI) -- The National Park Service offered some sage advice for park visitors who encounter bears: "Never push a slower friend down."
The NPS said on its official Twitter account that feeding another human to a bear is never the answer.
"If you come across a bear, never push a slower friend down...even if you feel the friendship has run its course," the NPS tweeted.
A reply to the tweet asked what a park visitor should do if they are the slower friend, to which NPS said: "Check in on the friendship before you head to the woods."
"Seeing a bear in the wild is a special treat for any visitor to a national park. While it is an exciting moment, it is important to remember that bears in national parks are wild and can be dangerous," officials wrote in a follow-up tweet.
The NPS shared a link to its page of bear encounter advice, which includes hiking in groups, picking up small children and keeping food away from the animals.
Babylon Bee material.
When relatives from big cities come to visit and want to go hiking, I pull out a jar of bacon grease and tell them it’s sun block.
Me too.
I guess we should be thankful that the government doesn’t encourage the friend with fewer Intersectional Grievance Points to volunteer to be eaten in the name of equity.
“The NPS [says to] pick up small children”
And Biden perked up when they told him that.
If I have enough ammo..sure, but if limited, it’s a choice. But ultimately I am joking. The scene in my mind is one from the 2nd season of The Walking Dead when Shane knee capped they other guy with him when they were fleeing walkers because he didn’t have enough ammo kill them all, and they both couldn’t get away. Shane survived.
Oops - aim. ha ha
What if your friend is a liberal Democrat? Then you know he is going to push you down so why not push him down first?
Then you know he is slow, overweight and waiting for the government to do it for him..................
I tell my liberal friends not to run at all. “Mr. Bear is really your friend, and if you rub him between the ears and chant ‘Abortion, gun control, climate change’ he’ll just roll up into a nice fuzzy ball. Would I lie?”
I love that discussion!!
Never watched that show, but thanks for the description. I guess that’s self-preservation there.
The three of us go the same speed, Smith, Wesson, and me.
He would have to catch up with me. I’m not going back to push him down.
I’m pretty sure my rapidly filling underwear would affect my name
We would for ever call you stinky
Because calling you Joe Biden would be to mean.
I thought they were going to get the woolly mammoths
Somebody at NPS has a morbid sense of humor. I thought that this had to be the Bee at first.
DANG!
Better to be an alive “Stinky”, that’s for sure.
Fools! That is just why we hike with slower people.
Their social media posts are all pretty funny. I don’t know who writes them, but I enjoy reading them. They generally get lots of fun feedback.
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