Netflix 'Narnia' Adaptation To Feature First Black White Witch

BabylonBee.com ^ | 1-24-2023 | Babylon Bee Staff

[servo1969]

[Jim W N]

Stung by the Babylon Bee again...

[Angelino97]

This fails as satire, because it's too plausible.

I wouldn't be surprised if someone at Netflix reads this and thinks, "Hey, that's a good idea!"

[Olog-hai]

Will Aslan end up being infested by the fleas of a thousand camels?

[Jim W N]

The Babylon Bee is pretty funny...

[Tell It Right]

Will the witch still live in a cold climate? Asking for a diversified friend.

[enumerated]

Does a polar bear shit in the… never mind.

[RedMonqey]

Reality is tough competition for the Bee but got stung by them with this.

[Larry Lucido]

Never mind that. Will there be black white cookies?

[Agatsu77]

Rushing off to totally F^^K up another story. I’m sure the story has been changed to be woke.

[Organic Panic]

I want to see white Luke Cage.

[GeorgianaCavendish]

Prophecy not satire.

[moovova]

We ride for free on our kid’s Netflix acct (at least until Netflix changes their policy in a few months). Free or not, it’s probably time to sign off.

Netflix is now nothing but black male heroes, black female heroines, gayness, foreign films, and end of the world/apocalyptic movies (because mankind has destroyed Mother Gaia). Content-wise, Netflix has gone to crap, and it’s obvious as to why they’re losing subscribers.

[MalPearce]

Not to be picky but the prequel to The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe has Jadis as a majestic woman who destroyed her own world simply by uttering The Deplorable Word. I read that book first -The Magician’s Nephew - and had her pictured as a seven foot tall, female Attila the Hun.

Upon arriving in London, the bare armed hussy is grossly offended when the Cockneys take the piss out of her, and tries the Deplorable Word with no effect. In the end she frightens a horse and breaks a bar off a lamp post, but doesn’t achieve anything more than gaining a write-up in a policeman’s daily report.

I’ve always been annoyed that they never film that book when its follow up has been done to death.

[know.your.why]

Anyone that is a fan of C.S. (Jack) Lewis knows that to mess with any of his works is to invite the wrath of bad juju in the manner of what would befall a blasphemer or a homosexual rock star.

[KarlInOhio]

I wasn't merely stung - I did a pro wrestling turnbuckle jump onto the whole hive. Now to see how much is real and where the Bee started making it up.

I do eagerly await the Screwtape Tweets where the temptation of humanity is explained in 140 character missives filled with poop emojis.

[Blood of Tyrants]

Almost got me! But it would spread the message that black women can be evil witches, too.

[Rummyfan]

At publishing time, Netflix announced they had bought the rights for Lewis's Surprised By Joy, a reflective memoir about grappling with his faith in the wake of his wife's death from cancer. Netflix says audiences will love their "fresh, modern take," and their story will follow Lewis as he abandons his dying wife to live his truth. The Year of Me will star Idris Elba as C.S. Lewis and is slated for release on the platform in 2024.

You know, I wouldn't be surprised.

[Aut Pax Aut Bellum]

Satire today, fact tomorrow.

[Fai Mao]

Try the Korean drama (Dubbed into English) “The Extraordinary Attorney Wu” It is really good, and has almost no wokeness in it