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Elon To Stay As Twitter CEO After Counting Mail-In Votes
BabylonBee ^ | December 19, 2022

Posted on 12/19/2022 5:41:52 PM PST by McGruff

SAN FRANCISCO, CA — After posting a Twitter poll that seemed to indicate most Twitter users want him to step down from Twitter's leadership, Elon Musk has revealed that millions of mail-in ballots sent in yesterday confirmed most people want him to stay.

"Initially the poll seemed to indicate that the majority of users and bots wish me gone, but that was a mirage," said Musk as he emerged from a dark, windowless room with stacks of ballots. "It looks like we got an overnight dump of 2 million mail-in votes that all say they want me to stay in charge of Twitter! Imagine that! Vox Populi Vox Dei!"

The dump reportedly came after millions of people around the world realized they had missed the Twitter poll and desperately sent in hand-written appeals begging the eccentric billionaire to keep running Twitter. "Please Mr. Musk! Don't leave! Twitter is fun now! PLEASE!" read one earnest note.

Officials with the FBI are reportedly outraged that the mail-in results were enough to overturn their expensive Chinese bot farm and are demanding a recount.

(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...


TOPICS: Conspiracy; Humor
KEYWORDS: twitter
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1 posted on 12/19/2022 5:41:52 PM PST by McGruff
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To: McGruff

Oh man, I really wanted this to be true!


2 posted on 12/19/2022 5:43:35 PM PST by CatOwner (Don't expect anyone, even conservatives, to have your back when the SHTF in 2021 and beyond.)
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To: McGruff

The Bee never lets me down!


3 posted on 12/19/2022 5:44:44 PM PST by DAC21
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To: McGruff

And after counting votes post election day.


4 posted on 12/19/2022 5:44:48 PM PST by Vision (Woke is communism and it has no place in America. Election Reform Now! Obama is an evildoer.)
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To: McGruff

Genius.


5 posted on 12/19/2022 5:46:38 PM PST by ifinnegan (Democrats kill babies and harvest their organs to sell)
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To: McGruff

This. Is. Perfect.


6 posted on 12/19/2022 5:46:56 PM PST by Reddy (BO stinks)
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To: McGruff

He bought Teitter always intending to hire someone to run it eventually.

This way he gets people to think they won a moral battle that has zero consequences.


7 posted on 12/19/2022 6:06:53 PM PST by Bayard
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To: McGruff

I know it’s the Bee, but I sure hope Elon picks up on that. Maybe even post pictures of boxes of mail-in-ballots being offloaded from a van.

That would be so cool!


8 posted on 12/19/2022 6:06:54 PM PST by aquila48 (Do not let them make you "care" ! Guilting you is how thery control you. )
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Bahahahahaha…


9 posted on 12/19/2022 6:11:34 PM PST by TnTnTn
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To: McGruff

Completely brilliant headline!


10 posted on 12/19/2022 6:17:05 PM PST by zeestephen (43,000)
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To: McGruff

Its almost effortless with them. Perfect.


11 posted on 12/19/2022 6:29:50 PM PST by bigdaddy45
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To: McGruff

If only...


12 posted on 12/19/2022 6:33:33 PM PST by MayflowerMadam
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To: McGruff

The Bee got me this time……
…I still think Elon is trolling……anyway, Musk likes the Bee


13 posted on 12/19/2022 6:33:33 PM PST by Guenevere (“If the foundations are destroyed, what can the righteous do?”)
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To: McGruff

LOL again with The Bee


14 posted on 12/19/2022 6:35:06 PM PST by Weirdad (Orthodox Americanism: It's what's good for the world! (Not communofascism!))
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To: McGruff

Elon got the result he wanted.
He is too rich to spend his time babysitting Twitter.


15 posted on 12/19/2022 6:58:29 PM PST by Berlin_Freeper
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To: McGruff

Da Bee, nothin’ but net on this one.


16 posted on 12/19/2022 7:24:06 PM PST by Roadrunner383
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To: McGruff


17 posted on 12/19/2022 7:52:31 PM PST by Chode (there is no fall back position, there's no rally point, there is no LZ... we're on our own. #FJB)
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To: McGruff

18 posted on 12/19/2022 7:58:39 PM PST by BookmanTheJanitor
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To: McGruff

“Officials with the FBI are reportedly outraged that the mail-in results were enough to overturn their expensive Chinese bot farm and are demanding a recount.”

LOL...just too, too hilarious!


19 posted on 12/19/2022 8:06:07 PM PST by ProtectOurFreedom (If you're not part of the solution, you're just scumming up the bottom of the beaker!0)
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To: McGruff

Bump


20 posted on 12/19/2022 10:13:20 PM PST by orlop9
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