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Missouri Man Robs Bank Using Back of Birth Certificate While Wearing Ankle Monitor
JONATHANTURLEY ^ | 11/21/2022

Posted on 11/22/2022 7:46:12 AM PST by devane617

We have come a long way since the heady days of Professor James Moriarty.

In Missouri, Michael Conley Loyd, 30, pleaded guilty last week to bank robbery. That is not particularly notable, but Loyd wrote his demand note to the teller on the back of his birth certificate and robbed the bank while wearing an ankle monitor. It only got more bizarre from there.

Loyd took his roommate’s truck to the robbery. He told police that he really did not have a particular bank in mind and selected the Bank of America in Springfield by random. He then panicked after succeeding in getting the money. He threw his birth certificate and ID out the window as he fled. As he passed police cruisers, he anxiety increased and he began to throw the money out of the window.

The boyfriend of Loyd’s roommate reportedly later called police and they picked up Loyd (appropriately enough) at the Lazy Acres Mobile Home Park.

(Excerpt) Read more at jonathanturley.org ...


TOPICS: Chit/Chat
KEYWORDS: bankrobbery
Hmm. Very interesting.
1 posted on 11/22/2022 7:46:12 AM PST by devane617
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To: devane617

His weapon of choice was a gub.


2 posted on 11/22/2022 7:47:37 AM PST by C210N (Everything will be okay in the end. If it’s not okay, it’s not the end.)
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Fetterman voter


3 posted on 11/22/2022 7:51:02 AM PST by dsrtsage ( Complexity is just simple lacking imagination)
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To: devane617

RIMMER “The Canaries”... You know what they say it’s supposed to stand for? “Convicts Army Nearly All Retarded In-bred Evil Sheep shaggers”! They haven’t got an X chromosome to share between them!
LISTER Smeg! It gets worse as well.
[RIMMER laughs, loving LISTER’s predicament]
RIMMER Worse! Go on.
LISTER I’ve signed you up, too.


4 posted on 11/22/2022 7:52:55 AM PST by null and void (Cujo would have been a very short story if the family owned a gun!)
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To: devane617

I blame our failing education system for all these poor dumb criminals...

5 posted on 11/22/2022 7:55:23 AM PST by Magnum44 (...against all enemies, foreign and domestic... )
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To: devane617

This is so stupid that’s it’s actually hard to believe.


6 posted on 11/22/2022 7:55:56 AM PST by EEGator
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To: devane617

[[and they picked up Loyd (appropriately enough) at the Lazy Acres Mobile Home Park]]

LOL! too funny!


7 posted on 11/22/2022 7:56:01 AM PST by Bob434 (question)
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To: devane617
The boyfriend of Loyd’s roommate reportedly later called police and they picked up Loyd (appropriately enough) at the Lazy Acres Mobile Home Park.

Ummm, this dude has all the earmarks of a Florida man/criminal. Some time back a Florida bank robber - when told by the bank clerk she couldn't open her cash drawer - offered to write the robber a check... He accepted and she wrote him a check - being sure to spell his name correctly...

8 posted on 11/22/2022 8:08:36 AM PST by GOPJ (Lists of fake hate crimes by date: https://fakehatecrimes.org/)
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To: devane617

the police catching criminals is like stomping cockroaches scurrying about in the kitchen when you suddenly turn on the lights at 3 AM: you only get the slow and stupid ones ...


9 posted on 11/22/2022 8:09:28 AM PST by catnipman (In a post-covid world, ALL "science" is now political science: stolen elections have consequences)
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To: devane617

Florida Man getting competition?


10 posted on 11/22/2022 8:12:42 AM PST by Spacetrucker (George Washington didn't use his freedom of speech to defeat the British - HE SHOT THEM .. WITH GUNS)
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To: devane617

The only thing he left out was taking a selfie with the teller and posting it on social media.


11 posted on 11/22/2022 8:21:35 AM PST by Southside_Chicago_Republican (The more I learn about people, the more I like my dog. )
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To: Spacetrucker

That’s the first thing I thought of, too!


12 posted on 11/22/2022 9:09:02 AM PST by HeadOn (Love God. Lead your family. Be a man.)
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To: devane617

Loyd be one of the very slow ones.


13 posted on 11/22/2022 10:01:33 AM PST by Vaduz (LAWYERS )
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To: devane617

Who carries their birth certificate around??? Heck, I don’t even know where mine is.


14 posted on 11/22/2022 10:50:08 AM PST by Organic Panic (Democrats. Memories as short as Joe Biden's eyes)
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To: devane617

"I was sure this was gonna work!"


15 posted on 11/22/2022 10:53:34 AM PST by COBOL2Java (Gun laws empower criminals. Guns empower the people.)
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To: devane617

This story could only have been more awesome, if he had robbed the bank while holding a beer.


16 posted on 11/22/2022 10:53:37 AM PST by Pajamajan ( PRAY FOR OUR NATION. Never be a peaceful slave in new Socialist America.)
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To: devane617
Perhaps we should shoot him.
17 posted on 11/22/2022 11:01:21 AM PST by Billthedrill
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