36 couples wait for every 1 baby?
aren’t there a bunch of kids in foster care to adopt?
From what I’ve been told it’s a nightmare to adopt out of foster care.
Mostly this is because the courts want to give the kids back to the biological parents and are willing to give them a chance to shape up which often takes time.
Really though the kid often goes back and forth from bio home to foster home and back again.
Many people don’t want anyone other than an infant.
No.
Most kids in foster care are not available for adoption.
Even if both parents are in prison and will not be out before the child has reached their majority it is a devil of a job getting their parental rights terminated.
An acquaintance of mine is working to adopt a pair of siblings who were pimped out by their mother. They are under the age of ten. It has taken four years to get her parental rights terminated and it might be happening this fall.
It took three years to get the daddies to sign off on the adoption.
Adopting out of foster care is a mess. And at any time the government can swoop and take the child away for any or no reason. And you are not allowed to contact them again.
They vanish into the void and the next thing you may hear of them is that their body has been found.
People are afraid that the children in foster care are going to be very difficult to deal with and turn out badly because of genetics, abuse, neglect, and prenatal drug and alcohol exposure.
They’d rather take their chances with the baby whose mother made one mistake, not a lifetime of them.
Many couples rightly understand that they may not have the skills to raise an older child from foster care. Those kids often have a range of traumas and behavioral issues from the abuse they have suffered from both their biological parents and the system that insists on yo-yo-ing them in and out of foster care until they are basically unadoptable.
The system is designed to destroy children. I admire the couples who have what it takes to rescue children from it.
My sister-in-law’s sister fosters children for a short time in Florida. Hard to adopt because the courts like to reunite them with their families. One thing she said is that you hear horrific stories of abuse, most of it deals with rape even as young as babies. Lots of emotional burnout with foster parents because of that.
I agree with everything that’s been said about foster care, and will add in my 2 cents. We did foster with the intent to adopt and it didn’t work out because the foster care system is run by libs and
1) the goal is ALWAYS to reunite parents with their kids.
2) it takes a lot for a child to be taken from their parents and that means that the children have been through severe emotional/physical/sexual abuse or neglect by the time they enter the system.
3) see number 1. These poor children are returned to their abusive parents over and over again, causing even more harm. Parents rights are put first and the children’s rights are last.
4) see number 1. It’s very, very difficult to adopt out of the foster care system.
We need a huge overhaul of the child welfare/foster care system.
And look at how many HOMOSEXUAL COUPLES GET BABIES....SOMETIMES TWO OF THEM!!!
Here’s one foster care story-
Agency calls in the middle of the night to say they have 2 siblings. One was 3 and 1 was newborn. Filthy house, not even salt in the cupboard to eat. No formula for baby (mom not BF).
Children arrive wearing basically nothing and agency says be sure to give them baths and check for bugs. So my husband and I do that at like 3am. The 3 year old is sobbing, of course. Long story short, the children stay and we do the going to the doctor to get them checked, buy them clothes (some with vouchers), things that need to be done. The kids settle in and it’s time for a parent visit. I take them about 10 miles away for assigned meet up and parents are no-show. That happened twice. The parents did not come to see their own 3 year old or newborn once.
The children stay about a month and are thriving. I get a call one day that says the judge ordered them to go home! The agency comes and get the kids and takes them to their parents.
A few weeks later I get a call that the children have been picked up again and we were asked to take them again. We were out of town for a family emergency and they were placed elsewhere.
I pray for those kids every day.
That’s just one story.
We adopted a little girl (3 1/2) from foster care. Her birth mother was on drugs. That’s how lots of kids end up in foster care.