McDonald’s menu hacks review: I ate them all so you don’t have to

masslive ^

[mylife]

The new McDonald’s menu hacks do not actually feature any new items you can order on the menu. Instead, they are permission slips for you to become fast food Ozymandias, building carb-laden meat monuments to hedonism. Look, ye mighty, and despair as these works crumble in your hands because you basically just smashed three cheap sandwiches together -- all because travelers from an antique land called TikTok said it was cool.

To be clear, you get absolutely nothing special if you try to order these items on the menu. If you order a Surf +Turf, all that’s going to happen is that the staff is going to hand you a Double Cheeseburger and Filet-o-Fish. It’s on you to build it yourself and avoid getting tartar sauce on your pants as you perform meat patty transplants to create McFrakenstein’s monster.

You will have random buns leftover. It’s not entirely clear what you’re supposed to do with them. I mean, I guess, I’ll just eat the bottom of a Filet-o-Fish with a half-shorn piece of cheese on it while staring blankly out the window. Yes, this is clearly what the cool kids are up to these days.

Here are the four hacks that make up the new menu:

Hash Brown McMuffin - Sausage McMuffin with Egg + Hash Brown (only available at breakfast)

Crunchy Double - Double Cheeseburger + 6-piece Chicken McNuggets + BBQ Sauce Packet

Surf + Turf - Double Cheeseburger + Filet-o-Fish

Land, Air and Sea Sandwich - Big Mac + Filet-o-Fish + McChicken

Sure, it’s all just reallocating the same ingredients in different ways. But that’s basically been Taco Bell’s entire business model for decades. Might as well try it out.

[Niteranger68]

Good chuckles in the article. I assume like most folks, in the realm of differential between what my taste buds love and my digestive system hates, it’s McD’s for the win.

[mylife]

Loves me some stuffed peppers with lashings of hot sauce!!

[mylife]

tis a funny article :)

[DaiHuy]

“Land, Air and Sea Sandwich - Big Mac + Filet-o-Fish + McChicken”

Why not just call it a SEAL

[Do_Tar]

Mmm, SEAL Sandwich.

I appreciate your marketing savvy.

[dainbramaged]

Many moons ago Taco Bell sold what they called a Bell Burger which was simply taco fixin’s on a hamburger bun. They helped to fill up a poor teenager.

[Allegra]

I always thought the Mexican Pizza was the best thing at Taco Bell. Apparently, they’re bringing it back.

I used to like the enchurrito. I haven’t been to a Taco Bell in ages, so I’m not sure if they still have that on the menu.,

[Tommy Revolts]

Somewhat interesting. I bet I haven’t eaten a McDonald’s in over 20 years.

[mylife]

you done good!

[Jamestown1630]

I’ve never seen it; but in recent years I’ve only gotten delivery and those menus are often different.

It’s not on their main site, though.

[Retain Mike]

If they keep their drinks at $1, then they need new items and higher prices elsewhere.

I always file out the survey,and get one of my sandwiches free.

[Vaduz]

Wondered why I always see a EMS van near by those places.

[mylife]

I'm feeling queasy myself...

[Dr. Sivana]

But that’s basically been Taco Bell’s entire business model for decades. Might as well try it out.

Except that when Taco Bell deviated from the formula, the products didn't stkc.

Note the now-gone Bell Beefer (Taco Bell version of Sloppy Joe) and the Mexican salad with shrimp.

[Vaduz]

LOL

[dsrtsage]

They should give coupons for metformin, atorvistatin, and coronary bypass with every happy meal

[mylife]

Mexican salad with shrimp sounds good to me!!

[mass55th]

I stopped going to McDonald’s when they used the Covid lockdown to get rid of their all-day breakfast sandwiches. The rest of their food is garbage.

[mylife]

you cant even walk inside! it’s crazy! the doors are locked!

[Harmless Teddy Bear]

At the basic level yes.

It is beef, wheat, peppers and tomatoes.

Rearranged a little but that is what they are.