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We all get Old!
email from friend | 9/25/2021 | unknown

Posted on 09/25/2021 5:17:10 AM PDT by sodpoodle

A lady goes to the bar on a cruise ship and

orders a Scotch with two drops of water. As

the bartender gives her the drink she says,

'I'm on this cruise to celebrate my 80th birth-

day and it's today..'

The bartender says, 'Well, since it's your birth-

day, I'll buy you a drink. In fact, this one is on

me.'

As the woman finishes her drink, the

woman to her right says, 'I would like to buy

you a drink, too.'

The old woman says, 'Thank you.

Bartender,I want a Scotch with two drops of water.'

'Coming up,' says the bartender.

As she finishes that drink, the man to her left

says, 'I would like to buy you one, too.'

The old woman says, 'Thank you.

Bartender,I want another Scotch with two drops of

water.' 'Coming right up,' the bartender says.

As he gives her the drink, he says, 'Ma'am,

I'm dying of curiosity. Why the Scotch with

only two drops of water ?'

The old woman replies, 'Sonny, when you

are my age, you've learned how to hold

your liquor. Holding your water, however,

is a whole other issue.'

'OLD' IS WHEN... Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you're barefoot..

'OLD' IS WHEN... A sexy babe or hunk catches your fancy and your pacemaker opens the garage door.

'OLD' IS WHEN... You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along.

'OLD' IS WHEN... You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police

'OLD' IS WHEN... 'Getting a little action' means you don't need to take any fiber today.

'OLD' IS WHEN... 'Getting lucky' means you find your car in the parking lot.

'OLD' IS WHEN... An 'all nighter' means not getting up

to go to the bathroom !


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Humor; Society
KEYWORDS: help
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I arrived last year;)

god bless

1 posted on 09/25/2021 5:17:10 AM PDT by sodpoodle
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To: sodpoodle

You arrived at old? What age is that? I’ve been here for a while, and I’m only 68.


2 posted on 09/25/2021 5:23:25 AM PDT by be-baw
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To: sodpoodle

I celebrate my 4th 20th +2 Birthday this week. I prefer them that way.


3 posted on 09/25/2021 5:26:06 AM PDT by Bringbackthedraft (In politicians we get what we deserve, usually the best that money can buy, guaranteed.)
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To: sodpoodle

My body is in its fifties. My brain swears up and down it is 17.

CC


4 posted on 09/25/2021 5:27:13 AM PDT by Celtic Conservative (My cats are more amusing than 200 channels worth of TV.)
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To: Bringbackthedraft

Ha! you’re just a child.

Trust me, when you’re my age you’ll see how...


5 posted on 09/25/2021 5:29:26 AM PDT by Mr. K (No consequence of repealing obamacare is worse than obamacare itself)
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To: sodpoodle

Time really does fly. I remember waiting for Christmas when I was 10. 1/10 of my entire life waiting.


6 posted on 09/25/2021 5:29:51 AM PDT by mware (RETIRED)
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To: Celtic Conservative

Especially on a Uranus thread. ;-)


7 posted on 09/25/2021 5:30:54 AM PDT by EvilCapitalist (Pets are no substitute for children.)
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To: sodpoodle

I may get older—hopefully much, much older—but I ain’t lettin’ the ‘old man’ in!


8 posted on 09/25/2021 5:31:27 AM PDT by BradyLS (DO NOT FEED THE BEARS!)
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To: sodpoodle

Thanx, I needed that, especially not caring where your spouse goes as long as you don’t have to go too.


9 posted on 09/25/2021 5:32:05 AM PDT by knarf
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To: Bringbackthedraft
Would you like a bag sir?

Nahh .. I HAVE one of those ... I'm waiting for two twenty year olds

10 posted on 09/25/2021 5:33:11 AM PDT by knarf
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To: Celtic Conservative

I look through 18 year old eyes.


11 posted on 09/25/2021 5:33:34 AM PDT by knarf
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To: knarf

Lol!


12 posted on 09/25/2021 5:35:39 AM PDT by EvilCapitalist (Pets are no substitute for children.)
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To: knarf

Getting old is inevitable. Thinking old is not.

CC


13 posted on 09/25/2021 5:35:47 AM PDT by Celtic Conservative (My cats are more amusing than 200 channels worth of TV.)
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To: sodpoodle

I take Humalog and a fluid pill, so I can sympathize with her, Make it Scotch on the Rocks, please.


14 posted on 09/25/2021 5:39:31 AM PDT by GailA (Constitution vs evil Treasonous political Apparatchiks, Constitutional Conservative.)
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To: Celtic Conservative

I am embracing my Codgeryness…;)


15 posted on 09/25/2021 5:41:47 AM PDT by rlmorel (Leftists are The Droplet of Sewage in a gallon of ultra-pure clean water.)
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To: Celtic Conservative

No problem with the thinking part, but my bones and muscles don’t want to cooperate.


16 posted on 09/25/2021 5:42:01 AM PDT by mware (RETIRED)
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To: sodpoodle

17 posted on 09/25/2021 5:42:37 AM PDT by Candor7 ((Obama Fascism:http://www.americanthinker.com/2009/05/barack_obama_the_quintessentia_1.html) )
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To: Celtic Conservative

Me too except my body has started to reject the 17 part.


18 posted on 09/25/2021 5:49:20 AM PDT by TermLimits4All (Biden will never be my President. There’s only 1 option left and it won’t be pretty.)
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To: sodpoodle

Being called “old man” is similar to being called “fat ass” in my book. I’m 63 and just joined a new company filled with millennials.

One that I’ve never met in my life called me “old man”. I told her “I’ve never met you or even know your name. If you’re a member of the Welcome Wagon, you should hand in your resignation”.

She calls me by name now and with great respect.


19 posted on 09/25/2021 5:52:45 AM PDT by albie
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To: sodpoodle

To Author: Brilliant deduction, Watson!


20 posted on 09/25/2021 6:11:02 AM PDT by chopperk
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