Humor in real life, just in time for Turkey Day. I gotta admit, a little Wild Turkey makes me bold, too.
To: Viking2002
Are people allowed to hold sunflower seeds in one hand, and swing a sharp machete in the other?
2 posted on
11/14/2019 12:17:22 AM PST by
Mark17
(Dad of Air Force Officer in pilot training. US Air Force aircraft, go faster than US Army tanks)
To: Viking2002
I think I would feed them onions and carrots and celery. That way....
3 posted on
11/14/2019 12:21:13 AM PST by
Texas Eagle
(If it wasn't for double-standards, Liberals would be have no standards at all -- Texas Eagle)
To: Viking2002
Turkey: [Knocks on door.]
Me: [Opening door.] “Hello! Come right in! Just in time for dinner!”
11 posted on
11/14/2019 1:34:56 AM PST by
familyop
("Welcome to Costco. I love you." - -Costco greeter in the movie, "Idiocracy")
To: Viking2002
Turkeys can be pretty hard to hunt in the woods. I wonder if they would let me open a “Turkey guided hunts” business there.
13 posted on
11/14/2019 2:11:29 AM PST by
wastoute
(Government cannot redistribute wealth. Government can only redistribute poverty.)
To: Viking2002
Typically it is illegal to feed wildlife - unless your hunting deer in Texas. I hope the wildlife rangers don’t fine the guy to much.
21 posted on
11/14/2019 3:40:56 AM PST by
mad_as_he$$
(Beware the homeless industrial complex.)
To: Viking2002
Toms River is 10 minutes south of me. Traveling down The Garden State Parkway you can see the turkeys all along the side of the road just strolling along.
24 posted on
11/14/2019 4:04:32 AM PST by
jmacusa
("If wisdom is not the Lord, what is wisdom?)
To: Viking2002
Bow time! There be some nice plump wild ones!
27 posted on
11/14/2019 4:37:30 AM PST by
Freeport
(The proper application of high explosives will remove all obstacles.)
To: Viking2002
Here in the woods of west Ocala, FL, we have Eastern Wild Turkeys roaming our property all the time. A whole gaggle of them, all females and little ones (in the Spring). Only seen a Tom twice - hoowee, those guys are BIG.
The ones here don't like bread, though. I threw out some stale bread once (for the wild rabbits) and the turkeys ignored it. Crows got the bread - I hate crows. Try to take a nice walk and they follow you around screeching their warnings.
Saw a hawk take down a crow once in midair. Good for the hawk!!
31 posted on
11/14/2019 5:02:12 AM PST by
jeffc
(The U.S. media are our enemy)
To: Viking2002
Feed a turkey sunflower seeds and you’ve fed it for one day.
Teach a turkey to plant sunflower seeds and you’ve feed it for a lifetime.
36 posted on
11/14/2019 5:18:40 AM PST by
a fool in paradise
(Recall that unqualified Hillary Clinton sat on the board of Wal-Mart when Bill Clinton was governor)
To: Viking2002
39 posted on
11/14/2019 5:31:59 AM PST by
Fresh Wind
(The Electoral College is the firewall protecting us from massive blue state vote fraud.)
To: Prov1322
43 posted on
11/14/2019 6:24:00 AM PST by
Albion Wilde
(It is fatal to enter any war without the will to win it. --Douglas MacArthur)
To: Viking2002
Kinda hard to understand what the problem is here...
46 posted on
11/14/2019 6:37:15 AM PST by
OKSooner
(Free Beer Tomorrow)
To: Viking2002
A couple of weeks ago leaving a BestBuy near my work. There were two Tom turkeys working the parking lot.
One would block the vehicle and the other would walk up to the drivers door and beg.
Avian Panhandlers.
To: Viking2002
Invite them in for dinner.
48 posted on
11/14/2019 7:12:44 AM PST by
bgill
To: Viking2002
Wish they’d come up to my blind and knock on it.
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