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To: freedumb2003
I am just too damn tired. I wake up every morning wanting the day to be over.

Reading through your posts... you are suffering from fairly severe depression. You are at the end of your rope and not really in a good position to be making decisions that will chart out the direction for the rest of the time that you have left. I do not know what your marital situation was but the worst thing that you can do to screw up your retirement is alienating your wife and getting a divorce. All the best laid plans go out the window at that point.

If you look in the mirror there is a much better than a 50-50 chance that the divorce had a whole lot to do with you and the issues you created by not taking better care of yourself and neglecting your wife as a result. If there is some way to reconcile at least until you can get yourself in a better place mentally, physically and spiritually you should make that your first priority no matter how annoying you currently find your wife to be. Get some kind of counseling and figure out how to appreciate each other again and enjoy your retirement without being on a shoestring budget.

Getting a divorce right before you plan on retiring is basically always a pretty bad idea when you are the man.

97 posted on 08/19/2019 10:30:43 AM PDT by fireman15
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To: fireman15

Thanks for the advice. Again, this is why I am posting here. But this seems to not be about depression more than a realization of my life decisions that led me here.

>>Getting a divorce right before you plan on retiring is basically always a pretty bad idea when you are the man<<

Truer words were never spoken/typed. Staying married right before you plan on retiring also is bad if you are the man.

I don’t think there is a return point for the marriage. Maybe something will change but I doubt it. But thank you for your kind and thoughtful words.


105 posted on 08/19/2019 10:41:59 AM PDT by freedumb2003 (As always IMHO)
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To: fireman15; freedumb2003

Agree. Sounds like freedumb would benefit from monthly B12 shots to get through this (energy, happiness, and clarity of thought). And as other freepers commented, I would try to settle it out of court. Cash lump sum.


115 posted on 08/19/2019 10:47:33 AM PDT by SisterK (its a spiritual war)
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To: fireman15
#97 - that was a good reply and the best solution, if things can be worked out. The only caveat is that life is too short to live in a poisonous, negative environment with a person you do not love. If it can be worked out however, retirement is always better with two than going it alone.

Like I said in a reply earlier, I'm getting up to the retirement age and so my focus is "Keep the wife happy, keep the wife happy..." Because I'd have to pony up even more than FD2003 if my marriage went south!

But I can't complain. It's been a nice marriage so far. Something like 35 years. We keep it positive and we ensure our home is an oasis from the craziness outside it.

171 posted on 08/19/2019 1:23:48 PM PDT by SamAdams76
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To: fireman15; freedumb2003
Getting a divorce right before you plan on retiring is basically always a pretty bad idea ...

I'm surprised (could have missed a post) no one asked if you are Christians or another religion. Find a way to reconcile with your wife. What God has joined together, let not man put asunder.
213 posted on 08/21/2019 11:16:27 AM PDT by af_vet_1981 (The bus came by and I got on, That's when it all began)
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