I hope this is not the general perception of international adoptive families. As I have mentioned before, one of my children was adopted internationally. I have some friends/acquaintances who also adopted internationally. Some from Eastern Europe, Russia, and Haiti, come to think of it. The process of disrupting an adoption usually comes when the personality/emotional damage of the child so disrupts the existing family structure that the parents aren't able to handle it. We had very good social workers on both ends of the process, but there are often experiences the child has had that aren't known for years after the adoption.
I don't know anyone in my circle of friends who has had a disrupted adoption. But in that case, and at that point, the local child welfare authorities and your referring agency I think would be mutually involved. Adoptions are finalized in country, at least ours was, and we were given entry documents at the American Embassy.
There is usually what's called a honeymoon period after the child comes home, and then, as Bettie Davis said, "Buckle your seat belts, it's going to be a bumpy (ride) night."
None of the families I know had lots of money, either. I'm sure that's not always the case. We went into this not knowing how we were going to pay for it, but my husband got a contract that paid our expenses just when we needed that amount.
The very, very rich live very, very differently than us. I nannied for one such family while I was in college. Sent the 12 yr/o rascal to boarding school, threw his toys away. Mom started kicking him one night after a Boy Scout thing and I got in between her and the kid to stop it. I yelled at this beyond rich woman. She didn’t fire me which was amazing. I prayed over him, prayed for him.
I'm glad you were there to get between them. I imagine you still pray for him.
“I hope this is not the general perception of international adoptive families. As I have mentioned before, one of my children was adopted internationally.”
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No, not at all, Tuscaloosa. It was just an eye opening tv show. And I think all parents have a honeymoon period then a “I’M NEVER GONNA SLEEP AGAIN” period, followed by head banging and “I have no idea how to parent this child.” P
Petey