Posted on 06/30/2019 7:45:24 AM PDT by null and void
The Doors: You have been bitten by an animal while trying to get it stoned.
The Who: You own a Goldwing with a baby-changing station.
Ted Nugent: Your hair has at some point been caught in a ceiling fan, boat propeller, or lathe.
The Rolling Stones: You own three cars and no stereo.
Canned Heat: You own three stereos and no car.
The Beatles: You can do exactly 1.5 pull-ups.
Badfinger: You are a Beatle.
Deep Purple: Some part of a law named after a young girl applies to you.
Led Zeppelin: The first three things you smoked were banana peels, catnip, and poppies, in that order.
Jimi Hendrix: You are under 20 or over 65.
The Kinks: You have bad teeth and are good in bed.
The Guess Who: You have good teeth and are bad in bed.
Black Sabbath: Your greatest joy is painting in unventilated rooms.
David Bowie: There is still, somewhere, a Dig Dug or Zaxxon machine with your high score on it.
Mott the Hoople: You are David Bowie.
The Moody Blues: You are a former volunteer at the Liberace museum, a serial killer, or both.
The Grateful Dead: Your stories about the seventies make your daughter’s roommates at Tufts very uncomfortable.
T-Rex: No matter how much you clean, there will always be trace amounts of glitter on your stove and blender.
The Eagles: You can only reach orgasm while listening to talk radio.
Pink Floyd: Your garage is full of failed versions of your stereo/barbecue hybrid.
Thin Lizzy: You are often forced to change or cancel your plans due to NO LOITERING signs.
ZZ Top: Your favorite Hank Williams is Hank Williams, Jr.
Chicago: You are incapable of talking about Chicago without mentioning their horn section.
Quicksilver Messenger Service: You become sullen when people don’t stick around while you fix their vacuum cleaners.
Crosby, Stills & Nash: You own an oversized hat.
Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young: You own three or more oversized hats.
Jefferson Airplane: You make your living buying and selling oversized hats.
AC/DC: You only remove your socks to shower, and then only reluctantly.
Aerosmith: You know a store that still sells puffy Reeboks.
Van Halen: You have a Peeing Calvin bumper sticker on your Jeep.
Sammy Hagar: You have a Peeing Calvin bumper sticker on your Subaru Brat.
Bachman-Turner Overdrive: You have an actual urine stain on your Subaru Brat.
Uriah Heep: You are the cause of the urine stain.
Santana: You have had an hours-long conversation with someone before realizing it was just a pile of clothes.
Rainbow: You have worn sweatpants to a funeral.
Foreigner: You have a severely wrinkled Jane Fonda poster under your bed.
Styx: You have a severely wrinkled Foreigner poster under your bed.
Allman Brothers Band: You do not own a bong, but can quickly make one from a piece of fruit or an abandoned toilet.
Bad Company: You have sustained several alcohol-related injuries involving sheetrock.
Cream: You know a guy who knows a guy who worked on Star Wars.
Journey: You own those running shoes that are shaped like feet.
Lynyrd Skynyrd: You somehow have both long hair and a sunburned scalp.
Yes: Your ideal partner would be into both tantric sex and fat guys.
Creedence Clearwater Revival: You are frequently missing part of an eyebrow.
Rush: You carry a small flashlight everywhere, and use it at least three times a day.
Blue Cheer: You have a subset of friends whose sole purpose is to hold your hair while you vomit.
Boston: Your best friend really likes Blue Cheer.
Steely Dan: You have snorted cocaine off a copy of Remembrance of Things Past.
Fleetwood Mac: You have snorted cocaine off a copy of The Hobbit.
Blue Oyster Cult: You have snorted cocaine off a copy of Type 2 Diabetes for Dummies.
Mountain: You have snorted cocaine off a Blue Oyster Cult record.
Nazareth: You have snorted cocaine off a member of Mountain.
Hawkwind: You sell cocaine to Nazareth fans.
Molly Hatchet: You sell baking soda to Hawkwind fans and tell them it’s cocaine.
Jethro Tull: You have a favorite rune.
Kiss: You have partied on a boat in a driveway.
The Byrds: There is a thin layer of sand on the bottom shelf of your fridge.Queen: You have injured several people by jogging into them.
Bob Dylan: You have the Swiss army knife that comes with a map reader and tweezers.
Electric Light Orchestra: You have three lava lamp bases and five tops.
The Beach Boys: You won’t live anywhere without a built-in microwave.
Mike Oldfield: You have five lava lamp bases and three tops.
The Band: You have misspelled your name while carving it into a picnic table.
Genesis: You know what a steeplechase is.
The Doobie Brothers: You have swallowed exactly two spiders—one accidentally, one on purpose.
The Zombies: You know what French cuffs are.
Warren Zevon: You have a jacket with elbow patches.
.38 Special: You have a tattoo of an animal driving a vehicle.
Bob Seger: You lost your virginity in a Chevette with a spoiler.
The Georgia Satellites: You lost your virginity in a Chevette that was being towed.
REO Speedwagon: You have a favorite brand of lip balm.
Bay City Rollers: Your shower has flower-shaped traction pads.
Bruce Springsteen: Your ringtone is either “Takin’ Care of Business” or “Chariots of Fire.”
UFO: You have burned yourself while urinating on a campfire.
Slade: You have smoked speed through a TV antenna.
Procol Harum: You have smoked hash through an antique rifle.
Heart: You have smoked chamomile tea through a hookah.
Alice Cooper: You have a photo of your dog wearing sunglasses on your phone.
Foghat: You swim in man-made lakes exclusively.
Stevie Ray Vaughan: You have a bolo tie in the shape of a gun, guitar, or state.
Stealer’s Wheel: You own an adding machine.
Traffic: You have several incense scars.
Emerson, Lake and Palmer: You have several self-inflicted incense scars.
Jackson Browne: Your favorite cola is RC Cola.
Hall and Oates: You have successfully fought someone off with a ski.
Blind Faith: You constantly misuse the word “penultimate.”
Billy Squier: Your vanity plates say ROKRMOM.
Neil Young: You know at least three stores that sell bidis.
America: You think America is Neil Young.
Joni Mitchell: You have accidentally eaten more than half of a scented candle.
Montrose: You have used a bandana as a coffee filter.
Steppenwolf: You have three or more cigarette burns in hard-to-reach places.
Golden Earring: You have three or more intentional cigarillo burns.
Jimmy Buffett: You have used AAA as a cab.
Brownsville Station: You have tried to use AAA without a car.
Meat Loaf: You have a mustard stain on your mousepad.
Joe Walsh: You have fired a gun while in your underwear.
Don Henley: You have been shot at while in your underwear.
Bread: You have a cordless phone with an extendable antenna.
Donovan: You have a non-mammal pet with a human name, e.g. an iguana named Phillip.
Joe Jackson: You are an excellent speller.
Steve Miller Band: You have not yet figured out how to turn off the hourly beep on your digital watch.
Grand Funk Railroad: You have become stuck trying to retrieve a quarter from behind a stove.
Blood, Sweat & Tears: You have become stuck trying to retrieve your friend who likes Grand Funk Railroad from behind a stove.
Little River Band: You have used a riding lawnmower to flee across state lines.
Big Brother and the Holding Company: Your coffee table is a big wooden spool.
Alabama:v You are from Alabama.
Kansas: Your first kiss was with a Toto fan.
Toto: You don’t really remember your first kiss.
MC5: You have barbecued a whole chicken at 3 am.
Ozzy Osbourne: You have barbecued a frozen pizza at 3 am.
Dio: You have accidentally dropped a flashlight into a barbecue.
King Crimson: You have spent an entire afternoon watching a screensaver.
Eric Clapton: You yell when you play table tennis.
Marshall Tucker Band: You wear black socks with white shoes.
Little Feat: You have hit a baby with a frisbee.
Buffalo Springfield: You have broken a reinforced window with a frisbee.
Blackfoot: You have stolen a wine cooler from the back of a pickup truck.
I became a single dad to my girls (4 and 1) when my wife lost a battle to breast cancer at 28.
I still remember my girls, albeit older, absolutely loving that movie when it came to TV.
What memories this brings back...and some of these fit...
Joe Walsh. Yep, I’ve fired a gun in my shorts...twice. Had to shoot a snake once and an armadillo another time. For those who are not familiar with armadillos, they tear up your yard digging for grubs. I Have holes in my yard right now and have only been able to nab a couple, I know we had 4 half grown “tankadillos” as I call them, a month ago.
Not sure if I have a favorite group, so many were excellent. I grew up listening to most of those on this list. Still have a few of the old albums...just a few old favorites - Genesis - “Nusery Crime” and “Lamb Lies Down on Broadway”
Jethro Tull - “Aqualung”, “Thick as A Brick”, “Songs From the Wood”, “Heavy Horses”, “Roots to Branches”.
Pink Floyd - “Dark Side of the Moon”, “Meddle”, “Wish You Were Here”, “Momentary Lapse of Reason” (I have no idea how many times we listened to the first 2 after ingesting various ummm...interesting substances...the term “window pane” had nothing to do with a piece of glass...)
And the list just goes on and on.
Joe Walsh, Supertramp, Styx, Frank Marino and Mahogany Rush, Beatles, Monkees, Rush, 10CC, Steely Dan (slang term for a dildo 100 years ago), Free, Jeff Lynne, Montrose, Traveling Wilburys, George Harrison, Tom Petty, Sammy Hagar, Blue Oyster Cult, Uriah Heep, Poco, Strawberry Alarm Clock, Vanilla Fudge, Captain Beyond, Iron Butterfly, Three Dog Night, Electric Light Orchestra, Blue Cheer, Atomic Rooster...
Captain Beyond was actually the first “super group”, they just got lost in the southern rock craze that started at the same time they released their 1st album, which was dedicated to the memory of Duanne Allman. Rhino (guitar) and Lee Dorman (bass) from Iron Butterfly, Bobby Caldwell, who was Johnny Winter’s drummer, and Rod Evans, first singer from Deep Purple. Their first album is an old favorite still, unfortunately their 2nd one went downhill, mostly due to the all too common hard drug habits that were very common, mostly heroin. Hard to find any hard rock album better than their 1st self titled one though. “Captain Beyond” is still at the very top of my list of all time favorite albums. “Dancing Madly Backwards” is a song most groups would have trouble topping...jazz influenced hard rock band...and Bobby Caldwell was probably the best drummer in the business at the time. Jeff Porcaro was next in line (Toto, Steely Dan and boatloads of studio work).
I’m also a fan of some who never did get the recognition. City Boy, Crack the Sky, Southerland Brothers (their guitar player is in Pink Floyd now, Tim Renwick), Charlie, Greenslade (Martin Briley was their guitar/bass player)...
John Hiatt is one of the best songwriters around. He wrote Confidence Man, recorded by Jeff Heally, Riding with the King recorded by BB King and Eric Clapton, One of Bonnie Raitt’s best ones, Thing Called Love...if you only do yourself one musical favor this year, check out Perfectly Good Guitar, great album and not a bad cut on it. Riding With the King has his original version of the song, and a couple of other good ones. Hiatt has been writing songs since the 70’s, here’s a comprehensive list of people who have recorded his songs -
Aaron Neville, B.B. King, Bob Dylan, Bonnie Raitt, Buddy Guy, Chaka Khan, Dave Edmunds, Delbert McClinton, Desert Rose Band, Emmylou Harris, Eric Clapton, Iggy Pop, I’m with Her, Jeff Healey, Jewel, Jimmy Buffett, Joan Baez, Joe Bonamassa, Joe Cocker, Keith Urban, Linda Ronstadt, Mandy Moore, Maria Muldaur, Nick Lowe, Paula Abdul, Paulini, Rodney Crowell, Rosanne Cash, Ry Cooder, Suzy Bogguss, The Nitty Gritty Dirt Band, The Searchers, Three Dog Night, Willie Nelson, Asleep at the Wheel, and Willy DeVille.
I’m sure I left out a few of the great bands we listened to years ago, but there were so many and so diverse it was unreal. From the jazz/horn based groups like Chase and Chicago to classical/renaissance based Jethro Tull and Yes to plain old 3 chord John Fogerty to hard rock Foghat, Uriah Heep and AC/DC...and all of it great, nothing today compares except a few of the old timers still plugging away like the Eagles and Pink Floyd.
Ya see...shouldn’t get me started about rock n roll...
You win one internet!
“Daddy would have gotten us Uzis. “
Crud. Wasn’t fast enough for the internet.
The Yardbirds’ most played songs on US radio (at least FWIH) seem to be “For Your Love” (Clapton on guitar) and “Heart Full Of Soul” (Beck on guitar). Both songs were written by Graham Gouldman, who formed 10CC in the 1970s.
SWINGROWERS - HEALING DANCE, THAT’S RIGHT, BUTTERFLY, KIAWAMI
PEROV STELAR - BOOTY SWING, INVISIBLE GIRL, CATGROOVE, DEMON DACE, THE PHANTOM
EARL - TONGUE TIED, ALL THAT GLITTERS
POSTMODERN JUKEBOX - ALL ABOUT THAT BASS
Wall of Voodoo,
Flock of Seagulls and
Butthole Surfers,,,
.
Suck ?
Captain Beyond,,,
Absolutely Great
Album cover too!
Dang
Freepers know everything!!!
Still having the
Occasional FlashBack?
.
Me Neither.
Four bands in five years? Maybe he could not get along with anyone?
So... I like ELO (and lava lamps, yes, true) but I should be checking out Montrose, because I have strained coffee grinds with... oh, all sorts of things.
Gramps does - he introduced me to a lot of bands; forgot The Eagles.
As a kid who grew-up with the Beatles, I always preferred the music & musicianship of the Yardbirds.
“For Your Love” hooked me on my first listen...even with a very subdued and almost non-existent guitar. It was part of why Clapton left the group.
Not a one...the only people I’ve ever known who admitted to flashbacks were those who dropped acid daily for years, and the 60s stuff that Hendrix, Clapton and Morrison were getting. Owsley stuff. Most of them were pretty much crispy critters to begin with...Like Syd Barrett, who was Pink Floyd’s original guitar player, they had to hire Gilmour because Barrett was totally out of it, sometimes he would just space out on one note for 5 minutes...Shine on You Crazy Diamond was written about Barrett. (from Wish You Were Here) He walked into the studio while they recorded that album, they barely recognized him. Basically fried his brain doing LSD daily.
Other than a very small few like that, I’ve never actually known anyone who had any flashbacks at all. Probably 3 or 4 guys I met 40 years ago who were obviously deep fried to a crackly crunch to begin with...I doubt they are still even alive. But all of them did 60s acid near daily for a long time, the stuff that didn’t get cut with all kinds of garbage.
John Lennon was getting close to that level when he quit dropping acid, ditto for Jim Morrison from what I’ve read about him. Both pretty well fried...Many more graduated to serious hard drugs, mostly heroin and either died from OD or finally wised up and went to rehab. Clapton for one...and Steven Tyler. Johnny Winter too, I saw an interview he did before he died, he was in bad shape, and said he spent 9 months in rehab, he wanted to go the full course and get off heroin for good. If you can find it, Eric Clapton wrote a good autobiography, it’s a good read. He quit heroin cold turkey the first time, rehab the 2nd. Alcoholic for years, finally quit booze in a rehab for the 2nd time. Got so bad into alcohol he could barely play.
the only people I’ve ever known who admitted to flashbacks were those who dropped acid daily for years
Seems like it was a world
Away,
Just a phase or something
that,Most,
Moved on without any “Scars.”
My worst nightmare has been
the “EX!”
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