Posted on 11/28/2018 2:27:08 PM PST by sodpoodle
IRISH AIRLINES....
After being airborne approximately thirty minutes on an outbound evening Air Lingus flight from Dublin, the lead flight attendant nervously made the following painful announcement in her lovely Irish brogue:
"Ladies and gentlemen, I'm so very sorry, but it appears that there has been a terrible mix-up by our catering service. I don't know how this has happened, but they did not deliver our meals until one minute prior to take-off. We have 103 passengers on board, and, unfortunately, we received only 40 dinner meals. I truly apologize for this mistake and inconvenience."
When passengers' muttering had died down, she continued, "Anyone who is kind enough to give up their meal so that someone else can eat, will receive free, unlimited drinks for the duration of our 4 hour flight."
Her next announcement came about 2 hours later...
"If anyone would like to change their minds, we still have 40 dinners available"
Lol.
sooo desu ne?
Into a Belfast pub comes Paddy Murphy, looking like he’d just been run over by a train.
His arm is in a sling, his nose is broken, his face is cut and bruised and he’s walking with a limp.
“What happened to you?” asks Sean, the bartender.”
“Jamie O’Conner and me had a fight,” says Paddy.”
“That little shit, O’Conner,” says Sean, “He couldn’t do that to you, he must have had something in his hand.”
“That he did,” says Paddy, “a shovel is what he had, and a terrible lickin’ he gave me with it.” “Well,” says Sean, “you should have defended yourself, didn’t you have something in your hand?”
“That I did,” said Paddy. “Mrs. O’Conner’s left breast, and a ting of beauty it is too, but utterly useless in a fight.”
Ah...hahahahaaa...oh man. You’re so bad.
How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Zero.
(My kids’ learned that one while studying world history. Although not from their teacher!)
I’m going to borrow that one. lol.
Definition of an Irish queer:
A guy who prefers women to booze.
Good! (I thought I might get banned!)
Was in County Cork yesterday, visiting Midleton and the Jameson distillery.
Lovely country, lovely people.
Very nice. Have a great trip.
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