Posted on 10/25/2018 8:55:42 AM PDT by sodpoodle
Do twins ever realize that one of them is unplanned?
What if my dog only brings back my ball because he thinks I like throwing it?
If poison expires, is it more poisonous or is it no longer poisonous?
Which letter is silent in the word "Scent," the S or the C?
Why is the letter W, in English, called double U? Shouldn't it be called double V?
Maybe oxygen is slowly killing you and It just takes75-100 years to fully work.
Every time you clean something, you just make something else dirty
The word "swims" upsidedown is still "swims".
100 years ago everyone owned a horse and only the rich had cars.
Today everyone has cars and only the rich own horses.
Your future self is watching you right now through memories.
The doctors that told Stephen Hawking he had two years to live in 1953 are probably dead.
If you replace "W" with "T" in "What, Where and When", you get the answer to each of them.
Many animals probably need glasses, but nobody knows it.
If you rip a hole in a net, there are actually fewer holes in it than there were before.
If 2/2/22 falls on a Tuesday, we'll just call it "2's Day". (It does fall on a Tuesday)
Why do we park on a driveway and drive on a parkway?
Why is being ‘Knocked up’ not the opposite of ‘Knocked down’?
cute
MOM upside down is WOW
AND
spelled the same either way. Said BOB
LOL! Bookmark!
Scientists have discovered that saliva causes cancer, but only when taken in small doses over a long period of time ...
George Carlin
Definition: Wasted Effort - 1. the early bird landing on AstroTurf. 2. Asking who the best man is at a nudist wedding.
If you’re in a car driving at the speed of light and turn on your headlights, can you see?
How do you ride a menstral cycle?
A man, a plan, a canal, Panama!
Reads the same forwards and backwards.
Reminds me of a portion of Jeff Dunham's routine with Walter ...
Talking about Walter's wife, Walter says "So she climbed on her menstrual cycle and ran me over ...
Nag-na-nag-nag-nag-nag ... Biiiiiitch ..... Biiiiitch ... Biiiiitch."
Love Dunham because he is funny and has clean humor
We put our garments into a suitcase but our suits into a garment bag.
Thank you, George Carlin
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