Thanks,I needed that.
Bud looks at the man, who obviously is a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, why not?"
The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell® notebook computer, connects it to his Apple iPhone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.
The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop® and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany
Within seconds, he receives an email on his Apple iPad® that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL® database through an ODBC connected Excel® spreadsheet with email on his Galaxy S5® and, after a few minutes, receives a response.
Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet® printer, turns to the cowboy and says, "You have exactly 1,586 animals."
"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says Bud
He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with amusement as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.
Then Bud says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?"
The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?" "You're a Congressman for the U.S. Government", says Bud.
"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, “but how did you guess that?"
"No guessing required." answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You used millions of dollars worth of equipment trying to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't know sh*t about how working people make a living - or about cows, for that matter. This is a herd of sheep” “Now give me back my dog.” AND THAT FOLKS IS WHAT THE PROBLEM IS
Luv ya Sod....Sac
Well, I’ll know where that story came from when I get stuck behind a Corvette going 50 miles per hour on the Interstate.
The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.
Bob has been missing since Friday.
As long as your beautiful daughter is a smart cookie.
To many dealers a woman walking through the door is like a lamb walking into a wolf pack.
Same with auto mechanics...
I have two beautiful daughters, now in their early thirties, but I confess I used them often to troll for help from salespeople, especially at the local Home Depot. It worked.
My wife has always loved “shopping” for houses we have no possibility of ever owning. She will go into any open house that is out of our price range.
She was driving in an exclusive neighborhood with a girlfriend and came up on a new development and went in to see the model home. The sales people ignored them completely.
A couple of weeks later she talked me into going to see it with her. We too were invisible to the developer.
About a month later her folks came to visit and she talked her dad into going. An older gentleman with a young redhead got a lot of attention from the minute they got out of the car. Funny how that works.
How do you settle a presidential election when the vote is too close to call? With a fishing contest in northern Wisconsin in the winter, of course!
After the first round of votes were counted, Hillary and Donald were extra deadlocked. Instead of going through a recount, they agreed to a week-long ice fishing contest to settle the election. Whoever caught the most fish at the end of the week would be the President-elect.
They decided that a remote frozen lake in northern Wisconsin would be the ideal place. No observers on the fishing grounds, but both would need to have their catches verified and counted each night at 5 PM.
After Day 1, Trump returned with a total of 10 fish, Hillary came back with nothing.
Day 2 finished, and Trump caught another 20 fish, but Hillary once again came back with nothing.
That night, Hillary and her
cronies got together and accused Trump of being a
“low-life, cheating’ %^&*(#*.” Instead of fishing on Day 3, they were going to follow and to spy on him and figure out how he was cheating.
Day 3 finished up and Trump had an incredible day, adding 50 fish to his total. That night, Hillary and her Democratic cohorts got together for the full report on how Donald was cheating.
Hillary stood up to give her report and said, “You are not going to believe this, he’s cutting holes in the ice.”
And this story, ... tells you the difference between a successful businessman and a career government politician.