[sodpoodle]

Muldoon lived alone in the Irish countryside with only a pet dog for company. One day the dog died, and Muldoon went to the parish priest and asked, 'Father, my dog is dead. Could ya' be sayin’ a mass for the poor creature?'

Father Patrick replied, 'I'm afraid not. We cannot have services for an animal in the church. But there are some Baptists down the lane, and there's no tellin' what they believe. Maybe they'll do something for the creature.'

Muldoon said, 'I'll go right away Father. Do ya' think $5,000 is enough to donate to them for the service?'

Father Patrick exclaimed, 'Sweet Mary, Mother of Jesus! Why didn't ya’ tell me the dog was Catholic?

[sodpoodle]

Father O’Malley answers the phone.
‘Hello, is this Father O’Malley?’

‘It is!’

‘This is the IRS. Can you help us?’

‘I can!’
‘Do you know a Ted Houlihan?’

‘I do!’

‘Is he a member of your congregation?’

‘He is!’

‘Did he donate $10,000 to the church?’

‘He will.’

[dp0622]

For 5k I’d do a Catholic (which I am), Jewish, Hindu, Buddhist and yes, Lord forgive me, muslim service for the dog!!!

Although i think muzzies eat dogs so i dont have to worry about that.

I’ll even say the service in Italian, that’s not too far from Latin, I think :)

[USS Alaska]

Why didn't ya’ tell me the dog was Catholic?

It's true:)

[trebb]

Or the Irishman looking for a parking spot at Walmart:

"Lord, it's cold and starting to rain, please clear a parking space for me."

A minute later:Lord, please find me a parking spot and I'll start going to Church on Sundays like I used to."

Now he has to go to the bathroom too and he says, "Lord, please find me a parking space and I'll even quit drinking me Irish Whiskey - anything you want of me and I'll do it."

At that moment, a car just ahead of him starts backing out of a slot and he says, "Never mind Lord, I found one."