Posted on 02/05/2018 12:18:12 PM PST by EdnaMode
As a woman, I have long dreamed of the day I could bite into a chip that has the same density as a menstrual pad.
That day may be coming sooner than I thought. In a new Freakonomics interview with the CEO of PepsiCo, Indra Nooyi, Nooyi revealed that the company is getting ready to release special snacks for women that would be designed and packaged differently.
Nooyi disclosed some of the essential gendered (and scientifically unproven) differences between men and women and how they eat chips.
"When you eat out of a flex bag — one of our single-serve bags — especially as you watch a lot of the young guys eat the chips, they love their Doritos, and they lick their fingers with great glee, and when they reach the bottom of the bag they pour the little broken pieces into their mouth, because they don’t want to lose that taste of the flavor, and the broken chips in the bottom," Nooyi told Freakonomics. "Women would love to do the same, but they don’t. They don’t like to crunch too loudly in public. And they don’t lick their fingers generously and they don’t like to pour the little broken pieces and the flavor into their mouth."
OhNoSheTwitnt @OhNoSheTwitnt Good news, ladies. We got a female Colonel Sanders and Doritos that don’t crunch, so feminism is cancelled. We’ve achieved equality. 11:15 AM - Feb 5, 2018
Listen. I'm all for ascribing negative social behaviors to men without any scientific basis. But I cannot count the numbers of times I've taken the New York City subway at 3 p.m. and watched men AND women eat a bunch of chicken wings, lick their saucy fingers, then put their nasty ass hands on the communal subway pole. This foul behavior transcends gender, race and class.
That's not stopping Nooyi:
"It’s not a male and female as much as 'are there snacks for women that can be designed and packaged differently?' And yes, we are looking at it, and we’re getting ready to launch a bunch of them soon," Nooyi told Freakonomics. "For women, low-crunch, the full taste profile, not have so much of the flavor stick on the fingers, and how can you put it in a purse? Because women love to carry a snack in their purse."
LibyaLiberty speak for YOURSELF. i have long been waiting for a lady chip, and will now launch a campaign to pressure the Doritos company to add a kind of hijab-like layer to each modest serving. #Shariatos https://twitter.com/ShitAmyySays/status/960533974174007297 … 10:24 AM - Feb 5, 2018
Congratulations, ladies! What you lack in first female presidents you now have in first female fried chicken mascots and purse-sized Doritos you can squeeze next to your tampons.
America, the beautiful.
What next, pablum?
The author likes to bite her menstrual pads WHY, exactly?
Why not just go through the whole LBGTQXYZ-blah-blah-blah and make treats especially for each letter of that freak alphabet?
Women like soggy chips? Women want thick, moist chips? Ridiculous.
Doritos are just empty carbs coated in addictive msg. Worthless. But if I were to eat them I’d want them crispy just like the boys do.
Well, I’ll be the first to admit that licking Dorito’s cheese off ones fingers is one of life’s little pleasures.
But, I’ve never spent much time watching others eat chips.
I’ll readily stipulate that I’m a slob and think nothing of wiping my hands on my jeans, picking my teeth and eating every last chip in a bag. Hey, I paid for it, might as well eat it.
Women’s mileage may vary but I’m pretty sure my wife would lick the cheese off her fingers too. Never really paid attention.
Don’t give them any ideas. I’m surprised we haven’t sorted snacks by gender and sexual preference. Maybe with a really kinky Chex mix variety too.
Doritos Ketchup
This is SOOOO Genderist!
Why is Dorito’s NOT introducing 63 chips??? Very insensitive to other genders.
This girl just snarfed half a bag. I know they are empty calories, and messy, but ask me if I care ;-)
If you prefer gendered snack foods, you might be a dufus.
Although she could have spent an extra five seconds thinking about it, and avoided the feminine hygiene product tie-in to illustrate the ridiculousness of genderization of food textures, as her side comments imply.
They can manufacture custom-made chips for Sarah Silverman, who recently said she’d like to eat an aborted fetus.
I don’t eat em but I buy em. One son likes the spicy versions and one loves the plain nacho cheese. Neither son chews maxi pads.
By catering to the few, you know like women who have no molars, they will lose most of us with molars who buy their chips.
I want my Chex Mix with nothing but Chex and melba toast. What does that make me?
Very good point!
My wife often complains about the texture of chips, bread and the like. She doesn’t care for anything too crunchy, claiming it hurts her gums. No point in eating something you don’t find pleasant.
Heterosexual because you avoid nuts and raisins. And interested in women of different races because you seek out those dark toasts.
PepsiCo is one of the more left wing companies out there. I believe the company’s globalist CEO was on the short list for Hillary’s Secretary of State. Fortunately this woman is now only screwing up a once proud company rather our country’s foreign policy.
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